Girl Drink Drunk
INT. THE BLONDE IGUANA’S BARROOM - NIGHT
The Blonde Iguana’s Barroom gives off a feel of nostalgia with its overpriced watered down booze, mirrored walls, mosaic carpeted floors and overall smoky decadence. It’s most famous and highly advertised feature is it’s ceiling, that can be opened on nice days to reveal a blue sky and sun, sun, sun. Or, when opened on nights, as it is now, can provide cheap romanticism by allowing patrons a chance to be bathed in moonlight with that extra twinkle of the stars. Candles on the bar and its small, round tables provide allow more light, but only enough for faces to be partially seen. In its past glory days, this place would’ve been packed to the threshold with movers and shakers, but now, it’s moderately empty with the exception of a group of businessmen at one table, a couple at another, and a few other stragglers. At the bar sits Angel, nursing a colorful “girl” drink, eavesdropping on a guy nearby talking on a phone.
MAN
Man, hoes today, man. I almost had to break one of ‘em down today, man. Bitch gon’ step to me, talkin’ all this ‘bout why she don’t have my money. This girl on real thin ice, cause this is about the fifth time she’s done this…I know, I know, but the thing is, they making me mean. I can be a real pussy cat, man, but these bitches want me choke ‘em! I swear, if it’s not one day, it’s the next, when one of them tries to step to me. I guess I gon’ hafta bust one of them all the way back to the white meat. (Chuckling) Y’know…Fo’ real. We jes’ gon’ hafta squab!(Settling down) Yeah, yeah. Oh, man. I’d feel like I was disrespecting you if I didn’t ask: How’s your family, man? Your mom alright?
Angel turns her attention to her drink and sips from it, as she looks up at the small television attached to the wall, at the bar. Some sitcom plays on:
GIRL
(whining)
Mom, can I borrow the car?
MOM
(Reading a newspaper)
On a school night? What ever for?
GIRL
There’s a party at Bethany’s house and everyone’s gunna be there. If I don’t go, I’ll be a total loser! And then Brad’ll never go out with me!
MOM
Aw, honey!
She gets up and puts an arm around her “daughter”.
MOM
It doesn’t matter what others think. As long as you’re true to yourself.
Audience “Awws”.
MOM
And if this boy doesn’t appreciate that, who needs him?
Audience cheers.
GIRL
Mom…that’s total bull! You don’t love me!
The girl thuds up the stairs in a ridiculous fashion as the audience cheers loudly and laughs its way into commercial.
Angel sighs.
ANGEL
They just don’t make ‘em like they used to.
Then, she finishes her drink.
WOMAN
Make what?
The woman sits a good chair apart from Angel. She obviously came down while she was distracted and set up quick, because she already has a drink and a lit cigarette to suck on. She’s wearing a tailored suit with flip-flops and her hair is fixed in a messy ponytail. She’s pretty, but her face looks tired and washed out. Even her voice seems to be a bit shaky.
ANGEL
Sitcoms.
The woman nods. Her hands shake a bit as she puts the cigarette to her lips.
WOMAN
I could see why you’d say that.
ANGEL
I mean, in the seventies, sitcoms weren’t just situational comedies. They spoke to the people at home. They reflected the times. They weren’t just about a quick laugh or a resolution by the end of the show; they were thought-provoking, man. Yeah, they were heavy sometimes and tv is supposed to help you escape, but you just can’t ignore life sometimes. Don’t get me started on Friends.
The woman thinks for awhile and then exhales smoke.
WOMAN
I never really thought about it that way.
Takes a swig from her drink.
WOMAN
Then, again, I don’t really watch TV that often.
ANGEL
Well, how can you? Between “shitcoms” and “reality” television, you’re not really missing anything. I mean, it’s getting so bad, I can’t hardly watch the news anymore.
The woman’s ears seem to perk up at that.
WOMAN
Now, that’s interesting.
Angel nods.
WOMAN
Why is that?
ANGEL
I can’t trust half of what they say anymore. Besides political influence and all the corny jokes they pop, it’s no use. I really hate it when they feign interest or sympathy…all that shit. Of course, I read the newspaper, but they’re just as fucked up, so…
The woman finishes off her drink and orders another, which is promptly refilled.
WOMAN
That’s a pretty jaded view to hold.
ANGEL
Well, just on that one subject.
WOMAN
Good. I’d hate for you to wind up being one of those old curmudgeons that hang around bars and talk to those sitting closest to them, because they’re in such a desperate need for human contact. Are you with anyone now?
ANGEL
Yeah, I’m with someone.
CUT TO:
A bird’s eye view of DEMONICA wearing a two-piece bathing suit, sitting on a pink inflatable life saver in the middle of a vast pool of water, splashing nicely. As we move in closely, synchronized swimmers come up, grab onto the raft and spin her.
DEMONICA
(High pitched)
WHEEEEEEEEEE!
CUT TO:
Various shots of Demonica diving into the water, from different angles.
CUT TO:
A shot of her sliding down the water slide, from different angles, until landing with a big splash.
CUT TO:
Then, a shot of the synchronized swimmers diving in, leading up to Demonica.
CUT TO:
The synchronized swimmers in a formed pyramid with Demonica on top.
CUT TO:
The swimmers doing a leg dance with their top halves submerged, with Demonica in the middle on the raft.
CUT TO:
Angel and Woman in the bar.
WOMAN
I mean, being by yourself is ok and you’ve got to love yourself first and all that shit, but, without someone or something else…
She seems to tear up a bit.
WOMAN
…life’s not worth living.
She sniffles. And just like that, what ever she was thinking, she’s sobered up from. She’s sitting up straighter and she knocks back her drink. She orders another and pays for her drink.
WOMAN
Viva Las Vegas.
She holds her drink out and Angel clinks her glass with the other.
WOMAN
I’ll see you in the next reel.
The woman walks away with her drink and out of the bar. Angel turns her attention back to the television.
Soundtrack:
“Beyond The Sea” Bobby Darin
“Theme from Original Star Trek” Alexander Courage
“You’re Nobody ‘Til Somebody Loves You” Dean Martin