A crystal ball rings out with the tinny notes of the first bars of "Barbie Girl."
"Coming!" yells a voice from another room. A self-contained human tornado rips through the doorway, almost bouncing off the pink and black decorated walls. The tornado resolves into a young blonde woman, who immediately grabs a headset next to the crystal ball. After plugging the headset into the base of the ball, she flops into a comfortable revolving easy chair covered in neon pink possibly-faux fur. Giving the ball a quick rub, she carols, "Hello?"
A faint outline of another woman could barely be seen in the swirling mists contained within the mystical crystal.
"Oh _hi_ Mirriam!" the blond, Ambrosia, chirps. She makes a few smooching sounds into the headset. "You would not _believe_ the day I have had! But you first...." Welcoming now done, she grabs an emery board from the crystal ball's table and starts inspecting her nails.
"No..." she said, accompanied by the sound of a few swipes at her nails. "No... no... he _didn't_!" Her face and voice now takes on a definite 'I told you so' tone. "It's your own fault though... I _told_ you that he would cheat on you, sure as mold in cheese." The woman's forehead creases as she frowns, wrapping a strand of hair around a finger. Her head tilts to the side. "Or is that mold on cheese?"
"My day?" Ambrosia replies into the microphone of the headset. "Well, first I had to take off this _disgusting_ hex one of the Nightsiders put on this _really_ cute guy. Like, oh -my- _gods_, _what_ a _hottie_! He's some important guy or something. And of _course_ he wants to watch me take it off..."
Another frown appears as she rolls her eyes. "Puh-lease, Mirriam! The _hex_! Mind _out_ of the gutter, will ya?" The look in her eyes becomes mischievous as she continues, "Not that I would have minded with _him_..."
"But seriously Mirriam, I was _so_ nervous! I mean, I _never_ stay looking as good as I want when I'm standing over a cauldron and my makeup _never_ stays on." She takes a few more swipes at her nails.
"I think it's the fumes from the caldron... something about marsh water from the night of a full moon that just, like, dissolves my foundation _totally_!" She listens for a moment. "My fave hat, of course!" Ambrosia bats at a pink fuzzy pointed witch's hat that is resting on its stand near the chair. "I know it _totally_ clashes w/ the color of my cauldron but it's my fave color and I look _soo_ hot in it!"
"No, no nail polish. Have you ever seen what fennel snake _does_ to 'Moondust' polish? What-_ever_! I never _can_ get an eye out of a newt without chipping a nail..."
"Oh NO!" she wailed into the headset. " 'What's the matter?' What's the _matter_? _Ewww_, like, I've got _eyeball_ under my _nails_!"
"'So?' Mirriam, Enrique's going to _kill_ me the next time I go into the salon! You _know_ he always gives me that look like I'm a _complete_ frau-frau whenever I come in with eyeball under my nails!"
A fluffy white cat slowly slinks its way into the room as Ambrosia sends her chair spinning slowly around. He looks up at her, shakes his head sadly and quickly leaps onto the table with the crystal ball.
"And for another thing..." Ambrosia's eyes narrowed as the table comes into view. "Wait a minute, Mirriam, the c-a-t just came in.."
The cat sighs and replies in a faintly British accent, "I am quite capable of spelling, Ambrosia. What are you discussing?"
"None of your business, hairball, now get out!"
"No." The cat assumes the sphinx-position and closes his eyes, claws invisibly latching into the doily covering the table.
Ambrosia gets up from her chair and towers over the table. She takes a hold of the cat's middle and pulls upward. "Move," she says as the entire doily rises with the cat. "It," as she pulls this way and that on the still-attached cat, dangerously imperiling the crystal ball resting on the doily. "NOW, Endy!" she yells, but the cat stubbornly refuses to be moved.
"Do you give up?" the cat asks sweetly. "And I am not a hairball, I am your familiar and I would appreciate if you would treat me with at least a touch more respect."
Ambrosia sighs. She begins to pet her familiar. "You're right, Endy. You are more than a regular old cat..." Endy starts to purr, relaxing under her touch. "I'm sorry..."
With a quick scoop, however, Endy is rapidly plucked from the table and thrown out the door, landing on the floor with a howl. "And as something more than a cat, I'd think you'd remember that I don't _want_ you in here when I'm on the ball with Mirriam!" The door is slammed in the cat's face and Ambrosia slouches back into her chair sideways, legs over one of the arms.
"Sorry about that, Mirriam. Endy can be _such_ a pain at times..."
"Black cats _are_ cute, sure, but Endy was such a sweet cutey little ball of fluff when he was little and I just _couldn't_ resist! Beats me where he got that capital-b bor-ring attitude and that accent. I mean, what's up with _that_? It's not like he hasn't lived with _me_ all of his life, so why doesn't he sound like me?"
"Mirriam, you have a _gireka_! Not only are they cute and totally cool, they've been known to rip out the throats out the enemies of their masters! There's, like, _no_ comparison!"
The image on the ball wavers a moment, as if a stone had been dropped into the mists within it.
"Oh, you have ball-waiting? Okay, I guess I'll talk to you later, then. Wait until you hear what happened with the hexed hottie! Okay, bye-ee!"
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