Of Kitty Cats and Gundam Pilots
In the time it had taken him to find Heero, get a step ladder to remove him from the remarkably small space between the kitchen cabinets and the ceiling, lament the loss of his favourite blue cashmere sweater (that matched his eyes almost exactly) and return to the bathroom Duo had flooded it. He was sitting in the bath, where Zechs had left him, trusting he was too little to get out on his own, which was true, but had managed to unscrew the faucet, though Zechs was sure he had tightened it as much as he could, and bung up the overflow with toilet paper. He was also giggling madly.
Putting Heero down he looked at the mess that was his once pristine bathroom. Bottles of cologne had been poured down the sink, meaning that despite that one of them had defecated in his shower stall and another peed in a corner that the room smelt strongly of Aqua de Parma. Both of them were also stinking.
He started counting to ten as he unplugged the bath and looked at Duo, “Bad Duo,” he said waving his finger.
Duo's large amethyst eyes just seemed to get bigger, “nyao.” He said but didn't look at any way offended. Then he decided to have a little sing song as he shirked his denim shorts, which were soaked through anyway. “nyao, nyao, nyao.”
Zechs decided it might be more productive to forget counting to ten and just count straight to one hundred. He was going to be grey before his time, he just knew it. Turning around he undressed Heero and lifted him into the bath tub. Heero took the opportunity to nuzzle his head against Zechs and murmur nyao in a rare show of affection. All of Zechs' anger went down the plug hole as he unstopped the overflow.
He ran a luke warm bath for them, bringing the water up only a couple of inches and using the lavender scented bath oil that he had bought earlier that day. Duo was happily splashing and singing and even Heero seemed to enjoy himself. “Will you two sit still for me?” Zechs asked them, “I've got a special present for good little kitties, so are you going to sit still for me, and not run the water, Duo?”
“Nyao.” Duo told him brightly with a winning grin.
“I'll only be a minute.” He said, wary because he had learned the hard way not to leave them on their own, “and I'm leaving the door open.” He said, from the hall cabinet he lifted several large warm towels and one of the bags of shopping which was full of bath toys. He closed over the toilet, and laid the towels down before showing them each of the toys before he put them in the bath. Heero seemed rather taken with the family of rubber ducks, holding out his arms for it, but Duo liked the shark, pushing it around with his hands singing nyao nyao nyao.
Heero didn't want his hair washed, despite that it was clumped together with some form of paste, as Zechs opened the bottle of “no more tears” baby shampoo he performed the best strategic retreat he could considering that he couldnt' actually climb out of the bath on his own. Zechs found it quite amazing that he had no problems climbing on the kitchen but he couldn't get out of the bath.
“Come now, Heero,” Zechs said, “Duo's not complaining.”
On he contrary Duo had started a deep rumbling purr in his chest and was happily shaping his lathered hair into strange shapes and curls. Zechs remembered being in the academy and working Noin's hair into ringlet and he decided he would do that to Duo, if he ever got Heero to wash his hair.
“It's magic.” Zechs said, feeling very sheepish as he said it, “it makes your hair lovely and clean and it won't sting if it gets in your eyes, I promise.”
“Nyao.” Heero said quietly, and rather meekly, as he sat down in the bath.
“Have I ever broken a promise to you?” Zechs asked him.
“nyao.” He actually sounded contrite.
“You have to wash your hair or you'll get cooties, so lean forward for me.” He made quick work of Heero's hair. And then lifted the two of them out of the bath, wrapping each one in a warm snuggly towel. “That wasn't so bad, was it?”
He looked around his house, at the havoc that they had wreaked. “Let's get you into your jimjams, shall we?”
“Nyao?” Duo said and Zechs was almost sure that he querying the use of the word jimjams.
Rooting around in the bags revealed pairs of briefs emblazoned with Action Man and two pairs of character pyjamas. “Now,” he asked them, “who wants to be batman and who wants to be the Flash?”
Duo grabbed the batman pyjamas and tried to put the trousers on over his head. Rolling his eyes Zechs helped them dress and then with one under each arm he put them down for a nap on his bed. Then assured that the plushies he had bought them would keep them amused if they woke he went to tidy the house.
“You left them alone?” Noin asked from the vid phone screen.
“Only for an hour.” Zechs said.
“I'm not surprised they made a mess,” Noin said in an exasperated town, “I'm only surprised you had a house to come home to.” She swept her bang from her face, “I sent out Walker and Treize sent out Une to buy the things we needed, you could have ordered someone to do it, or to look after them, you are a high ranking member of Oz.”
“I didn't think of that,” Zechs said, realising that his antique sheep skin rug and suede sofas were both destroyed and that he would have to buy new. “All right, I told them to be good, and they got into the kitchen cupboards.”
“They're never going to grow up,” Noin said, “according to Trent they're going to be like this forever.”
Zechs went pale. “Really.” He asked.
“Well, that's the theory.” She said, “no one's ever done anything like this before, we still don't know what kind of life span that they have, and remember they're fifteen, they're just thinking like kittens, they're always going to be that tiny and that cute but they might start thinking like adults.”
“I didn't know that.”
“We got the opportunity to grill Trent after you left.” She answered calmly, “so where are they now?”
“I bathed them and put them down for a nap, then I ordered out for a plumber to unblock the toilet. But they peed in the shower.” He said.
“Can they reach the toilet, I had to get a step stool for Relena.” There was a pause. “You didn't get them a step stool did you?”
“No.” Zechs answered. “I've never had kids before.” He protested.
“They're not children, Zechs,” Noin said quietly, “they're miniaturised Gundam pilots moulded with feline DNA.”
“It's amazing, Heero can get into my wardrobe and then climb up unto the kitchen cabinets to nap but he can't reach the toilet.”
“You weren't there to help them.”
“Nyao.” Came from the bedroom.
“I have to go, they're awake.” Zechs said cutting off the call and lifting the last of the items that were to go into the bedroom. Instead of buying them beds he had bought animal duvets and baby blankets to cover them, but he was beginning to think that he would put them in the cage.
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