a simple request

i want someone who will make me want to cry again
i do feel for anyone who is suffering
i once saw an old man in a parking lot
he was a cripple
he had braces on both legs, and used pair of those aluminum crutches that attach to one's arms
the crutches that MS victims use
he propped himself up against a wall to rest and have a cigarette
it was cold and windy out
he was having a lot of difficulty lighting his cigarette
his hands shook so much that he had to hold the lighter in his right hand, and try to hold his right hand
steady with his left
it wasn't working too well
he couldn't hold his lighter still for long enough at the tip of his cigarette to light it
on top of that, the wind kept blowing the lighter out
i watched him for ten minutes before he actually succeeded in smoking
i wanted to go over and help, but i couldn't
it hurt too much
it was this day that i learned what the expression, "pains my heart" truly means
what i learned is that it is not just an expression
i truly felt a pain in my heart for this man
it was one of the saddest things i have ever witnessed

i didn't cry

i want to find that woman whom, when she is sad, i cry for her
when i am sad, i cry to her
i want to find the love that will allow me to cry again
prince … from "love 2 the 9s" … "when we said we loved each other, instead of smiling, would you cry?"
god. if that doesn't say it all!

when you kiss anyone you are attracted to for the first time, your heart jumps
maybe even the twentieth time
if you are attracted to someone, when she touches your face, with that affectionate look in her eyes,
a small cold rush runs through your body
your sudden loss of breath makes you gasp lightly
your hairs stand on end
i know you must have felt this at least once
if you haven't, i am so sorry
i want to have that feeling every time she touches me
after having sex a thousand times
after touching and tasting every part of her body countless times
after seeing her at her best and worst
after being the one holding her hair back while she vomits the pound of bad shellfish she ate
after seeing her the morning after that party that we both got drunk and said things we didn't mean
pale face, tangled hair, smudged mascara and all
five, ten, twenty years later
i still want to gasp to catch my breath when she strokes my cheek with the back of her hand
i want her to still gasp
i want every kiss to be like that first one