How do people find this place? Sure, some people may be desperately seeking information on sock puppets, Pantomime horses, and dancing mice. And then there are those who type an unlikely phrase into a search engine, and, inexplicably, get sent here. Phrases like these, for example.
'Swift kick in the arse'
Well, if you say so. Bend over- *thump*.
'Big fat fluffy teddy bears'
As opposed to small, skinny, bald ones.
'Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory with subliminal messages'
Don't listen to your parents when they tell you chocolate is bad for
yoooou... Chocolate is gooooood... buy lots of chocolate... Chocolate will
make it all better...
'Ugg boot picture'
Look. Ugg boots are great and all, but I think looking at pictures
of them might be bordering on the obsessive. Or else someone has a very
weird fetish.
'Recess Cartoon porn'
Aaargh! What is wrong with you people!?
'Russell Crowe porn pictures'
Aaargh! Again, What the hell is wrong with you people!?
'Smokin the Sherm'
What the hell is 'the Sherm?' Whatever it is, I doubt it's legal.
'Send me some valium'
No way. I need it! Get your own darn valium!
'Drunk bodyshots'
No, thank you. I only do bodyshots when I'm sober.
And, finally- 'Goats postitgnome'
Uh... what?
So... those people may have been a little off track. But I like to think
I can do something for everybody. So, here for your enjoyment- Big
fat fluffy teddy bears giving Russel Crowe a swift kick in the arse while
smokin' the sherm, taking valium, doing drunk bodyshots,looking at Recess
cartoon porn, and discussing Willy Wonka subliminal messages with a goat's
postitgnome!