An Ordinary Day in 2050
by Soledad Cartwright
Author's note: I borrowed the names of Pik Molander and Dado Bimbi from a science fiction story whose author and title I don't remember any more. I noticed the names, however, because they were funny. So, the names aren't mine, though the story is.
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It was an average morning on Starbase L5. Pik Molander, commander of the station got out of his tube a 04.00 hours and looked up his working schedule. Five freighters were supposed to dock in (what was fortunate because he had some business with the freighters' captains), and High Commander Ferris promised to visit the station (which was unfortunate because High Commander Ferris was an idiot).
Furthermore, the station's Chief Medical Officer, a certain Dr. Savage asked for a short breefing as soon as the commander could spare some time for her. Pik Molander decided to speak with the doctor first, which he did every time, the CMO asked him to do so. Dr. Savage was a chubby little woman who looked as harmless as one of her caughing syrups, but she wasn't. In fact, no man on the station dared to refuse her when she selected him for partnership. She wouldn't kill them, of course. There were much more cruel ways of punishment for a doctor.
So the commander was eager to satisfy the horny doctor who was more than worthy her name, and he was just going to call her as his secretary, a Q15-type android came into his office and told him:
''Commander we have a problem. The fusion generators have just blown up. We have approximately 6.7,8 minutes to evacuate the station. Your orders, sir?''
Pik Molander sighed heavily. This seemed definitely not to be one of his favourite days. But again, he was used to solve problems, wasn't he? "Initiate evacuation procedure <<Exodus>>, he told the android, and ask Mr. Dethwe to come in my office."
"By your command", the android replied and left the office. It was 05.00 hours. Pik Molander sighed again and softly cursed under his breath. He hated this stupid, half-transparent mechanoid that was sent him by Space Controll, after his personal secretary, a little blonde, purple-eyed, big-titted nympho from the Venus-colony has been poisoned by the vigorous Dr. Savage. The commander understood, why Space Controll didn't wanted to lose another sex bomb like Miss Colt - and no one dared to provoke Dr. Savage, not even Commodore Dull -, but he couldn't get used to that machine. He hated it, and he hated it a bit more every day.
By the way, he hated Chief Petty Officer Dethwe as well. He found aliens stupid and disgusting, but Dethwe was worse than all the aliens together. He wasn't even a disgusting person for his own, since he was a clone. And he was a nervous wreck anyway. A nervous wreck who was never on time.
Dethwe entered the commander's office about three minutes after the android had left it. "Evacuation procedure is on its way", he reported with that annoyingly high-pitched voice of his.
"Casualties?", the commander asked. Dethwe waved with his small, fleshy hand.
"Dr. Savage has already eliminated them, commander. She asks if you would care to board your personal escape pod."
"Tell her to take my pod and wait for me on the launching bay", Molander ordered, ''And see after that Venerian cocoon at the stasis chamber. Let it transport to sickbay."
"As you wish", the clone answered without respect and was gone.
Pik Molander allowed himself a devilish grin. If things went on their expected way, in four more minutes he would be free and wealthy.
"Commander", the android rolled in and blinked with its silly red and orange headlights, "your escape pod just exploded on the launching bay... with Dr. Savage in it!"
Pik Molander tried to look sad but hadn't succeeded.
"What a pity'', he said, his face fallen down. ''Has the Venerian cocoon been transported into sickbay?"
"Yes, commander."
"Very well, then. Go to Engineering and help Mr. Dethwe putting out the fire."
"By your command", the android said again and left. Molander shaked his head. With any luck, he wasn't going to hear that silly phrase anymore.
Thirty seconds later the station's tactical officer, Dado Bimbi, a seven-feet-tall, orange-skinned Velorian with six arms, came into the commander's office and reported: "Sir, evacuation ins't going very well. The escape pods have been damaged through the explosion on the launching bay, and we only have two more minutes left. I'm afraid, we'll have to eject the fusion core."
Molander wasn't very happy with this solution. "But the government wanted us to blow up this bloody station, so that they can blame commodore Dull for it and send him to retirement."
Dado Bimbi looked at him with worried eyes. Then he folded his arms - all six of them - and told him: "I'm not going to die for this huge amount of garbage. Sir." "Neither am I", Molander answered. "Not now, when we finally got ride of Dethwe and the savage doctor. All right, then. Let's eject the core."
And so they did. The fusion core went up like a supernova. Station L5 was shaking violently, but the artificial gravity hold on. Pik Molander looked out of the window of his office and smiled. True, his failed his actual job. He didn't blow up the station. But he managed to eliminate Dr. Savage and that annoying clone... and the android was flowing around in one thousand pieces somewhere out there. It was a delightful thought.
He left his office and went down to sick bay. In the intensive care area, the five feet tall Venerian cocoon was just breaking up. Out came a purple-eyed, bigh-titted little Venerian nympho, with long, blonde hair... which was her only clothing. Pik Molander smiled and patted the little Venerian female on the bare butt. Things were definitely going better from now on. Who knows; one day he might even be able to blow up the station, after all. But until then, he'll have a much more satisfying secretary than the android Q15.
The End