Issue 7 Page 2

Alfie’s Lung Joke

Dr Centre-Link is examining applicants for their Transport Concession cards.
He has a reputation for being tough and trying to trick the applicants. Any wrong answers and their applications are rejected!
Ken is next in the waiting room. He is very worried about the test. He is starting to feel short of breath. He increases his oxygen flow from 2 to 4 litres per minute. This helps just in time as John comes out smiling. “No worries Ken. When the Doc asks you what happens when you get dressed, tell him you start gasping for air. When he then asks you what happens when you walk up a hill, tell him you can’t breathe at all. No sweat, ol’ mate. The card is yours”, says John.
Ken feels a bit more relaxed now. Until his name is called. He trembles a bit as he is ushered in to the Doctor.
“Good morning, Ken”, says the Doc. “Please sit down. I would like you to answer 2 simple questions.”
“Yes, Doc”, answers Ken promptly, before adding: “Do my best”.
“Well Ken, tell me what would happen if I cut off your right ear?”
Without any hesitation, as if he had pre-empted the question, Ken replies: “Why Doc, that’s an easy one. I would start gasping for air”. Doc is quietly amused by this but he manages to maintain his professional composure.
This is not the answer he expects for this question. He is used to applicants being coached as to how to obtain their concession cards. Rather than failing Ken outright, he decides to give him another chance.
“Tell me then, Ken. What would happen if I cut off both of your ears?”
Again without any hesitation, Ken replies: “Doc, that’s also easy. Why, I would not be able to breathe at all. My oxygen tubing would fall right off!”

Issue 7 Page 2