Because We Aren't in Anyone Else's Board Fic
Written by: JenJoy & Maye
Disclaimer: The Regulars own themselves, anything Buffy is owned by Fox.
Once upon a time, in the occasionally enchanted kingdom known as the Spoiler Board, JenJoy and Maye were attempting to create a new thread. As it was a bright and sunny afternoon, most of the members were outside going about their business, but these two faithful Creatures of the Night were shunning the sun in the hopes of saying something that might get them into another board member's Board Fic.
JenJoy: So.....um....you hear any new Buffy spoilers?
Maye: OOH, well, let's see.....um......no. Hear any for Angel?
JenJoy: Well, actually, no. Isn't there anyone else out there?
insert cheesy sound effect of crickets chirping here
JenJoy: Guess not.
Bob: Hey, I'm here. I am a new poster. I've never been here before......really.
Maye: Oh hey, newbies are always welcome.
Bob: That's cool. So, what's up with this COTN thing? Cuz I heard you are all
freaks who should die.
JenJoy: Hey....wait a minute......you're not a newbie....you're LARRY!
Bob: Ah, no, I'm not Larry, he's....he's my cousin, yeah that's it, my cousin.
Maye: You can't fool us, Evil One! I'd know your unoriginal and repetitive insults
anywhere! You can't post here!
Bob/Larry/Ashram/Mohammed/whoever: And who's going to stop me?
cue the superhero music
JenJoy and Maye: WE ARE!
Maye: For you may insult me, you can belittle the COTN, but we say death to any
and all who choose to insult OUR Board Momma!
JenJoy: Die fiend!
Impressive battle insues. JenJoy and Maye deftly ignore any and all pathetic attempts at posting the Evil One puts forth, but are unaware that with each post, Larry is setting a trap for our heroines! Soon, they are completely surrounded by weak posts, cutting them off from all intelligent conversation! *gasp*
Maye: Oh no, we're surrounded!
JenJoy: What do we do now?
Kurupt: Never fear! For I have returned from across the seas to put this board to
rights!
The Creatures of the Night: And we are here too! To the rescue!
Maye: Oh sure, NOW you show up.
XW: Hey, don't complain, you're the one writing this fic.
Maye: Well, if you are going to use logic.....
Yet another impressive fight scene ensues. Gellar's man and Mina/Elizabetha appear, battling Larry with tennis rackets.
Oz,wielding his lightsaber and sporting a puffy jaw : Take that, evil poster!
JenJoy: Uh, Oz.....the fight's over that way. You are slashing at imaginary
butterflies again.
Oz: Oh. Sorry.
wwwolfe leaps into the fray, his sharp remarks wounding our enemy. Larry recoils in terror
Evil Larry: No! My feeble insults are no match for your wicked satire!
Nyx begins to draw humiliating pictures of the enemy, as Bagel pelts him with an endless supply of cookies
Larry: My powers are dwindling...No!
AnGeL X: I've warned you time and again. You have wasted your last chance.
Board Momma pulls out her all-powerful delete button. She pushes it, erasing Larry from existence. Maye and JenJoy are free, the board is safe, and the world returns to normal.....well, what passes for normal around here.
The End
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