Zac Robinson

TODD

Univ. Central Oklahoma

Here I am at the All-Star game getting some helpful advice from my wife Heather before I take the mound.

I have a lovely wife, Heather, and we moved to Taegu, Korea South in July of 2000.  I recently got extremely drunk on soju and can't remember a thing.  I'm pretty sure Heather took advantage of me like she's always trying to do, but I'm not sure.  She claims that I will be a father in June.  Hopefully, his eyes won't be slanted or she may have taken advantage of the wrong guy.  I've already bought the little guy some ballerina shoes in hopes that he will some day follow in the footsteps of his infamous uncle, Ben.  I think Heather threw up a testicle, so I'm guessing it's a boy. I was right.  We now have a left handed baby boy.  I wanted to name him Sylvester, but Heather won the coin toss and he is named Jace.  He's doing well, but he's having a hard time finding a job.  He'll probably just turn professional gigolo next month.

If not for this nagging groin injury, I would have stolen first base a lot earlier in the count.

Recently, I have added 6 pounds to my frame and I am up to 178 pounds now in my quest to become the whitest sumo wrestler.  Also, I have been busy with my part-time job as a wax lip model.

I will forever be indebted to my dad, the first person to poke me on the top of the head.

Helpful Korean Words anyahaseyo - hello makeju - beer hanpyong - one glass igoo - oh shit booyah jusayo - show me cumsoomida - thank you jusayo - please