The Hardy-har-har's of Teaching

I would have entitled this, "The Joys of Teaching" but I don't want to give you the wrong impression that I actually LOVE teaching. I don't.

I hate teaching.

I hate coming to school twenty minutes before my first class to flip through my notes, figuring out how to explain those concepts to my kids, and worse, figuring out how to let them appreciate the lesson while keeping them awake. After all, the subject IS Calculus.

I hate preparing exams. The burden of choosing which problems to include in the exams is just too much. The problems should really measure how much a student has learned, but I have to make sure, though, that these problems would not give me a brain tumor when I finally do the checking.

Did I just type the most dreaded part of teaching? I hate checking. The color red simply reminds me of blood, and whenever I check my students' papers, blood, I mean, the color red is just about anywhere: x-marks, bigger x-marks, question marks, circles, zeros, corrections, huge x-marks, bigger zeros ... all in bloody red.

Of course, checking isn't just about "painting" the test papers red (literally). It also involves finding the part where the solution got mixed up, figuring out what the student understood about the problem, fighting the urge to give high partial points, so that the student would get the actual score he or she deserved.

I hate the look on my students' faces when I return the results of their exam. They would cover their faces until I call their name, reluctantly get their papers, take a peek at their scores, and pout. That last one would really bother me because I know that they could have done better.

I could go on and on, complaining about my job. But I can probably stop here. I'm sure, by now, you get my point: I hate teaching.

But maybe, just maybe, when I finally get the guts to decide that I absolutely, 100%-surely hate teaching, and I finally find it in my heart to quit this hell of a job, and say my final, "Goodbye, kids," I'll bring with me tons of heartwarming memories:

Celine's crinkles, Kathleen and Wendel's lovestory, Fay's 1.0 grade; a student asking me if we were on the same Algebra class, and my quiet reply that "No, I'm your teacher"; hundreds of text messages from my students; Cybelle's Japanese characters written all over her Calculus test paper; Katfaj's sketches of the Powerpuff Girls, also on her test paper; Carlo's singing telegram; school mate Bea;

Ely's smile; Jocy's grin; William's cheerfulness; sleepy afternoons and students actually falling asleep (and waking up after I've dismissed the class); intelligent questions, weird questions, even wrong questions; corny jokes; consultation sessions at the canteen; "Yuh!" and "At least you've gained skills"; Dynamic Duo Karla and Gideon during a contest; how the cutie couple, Rina and Imman, would make sipsip in my guestbook, and finding out that they weren't a couple after all; Joseph's e-mailed suggestion that I should use pink, orange, or lavender ink instead of red, after reading this; Asid's "Teeeacher! Teeeacher!"; Katrina's (almost) convincing nods; Frauline's shy nods; "lookmates" Doy and Frank; Math 53 couple Hazel and Dacs; chatting with the Bio kids after the last meeting; Jhoanne's inspiring e-mail;

A satisfied grin from someone who passed an exam; students crying after the semester because of a failing grade; hate-mail that made me pray to God to ask for strength to be able to smile when I come to class the next day; crying after class because of a student's sarcasm; Carla May's humility and her text message that she finally passed Algebra; math major Betty's remarkable study habits and her thank you gift; Camille's determination; news from old students that they are getting better grades in math now; jumping jolly Eloi happily sreaming, "Maaaaaa'am!" whenever she sees me; everyone's determination and patience that push me to do my best in teaching; Lizbeth's thank you's that make me want to teach more ...

Again, I could go on and on. I don't actually want to end this list because as long as I can stand these hardy-har-har's of teaching, this list will go on (and on, hopefully, until it approaches infinity).