god i love eminem...if there ever was someone that makes me laugh when i'm angry cuz they have balls to say what i wanna say to people that made them mad...it'd be him.
with that said, i really need to vent. see, this girl i'm kinda seeing, well, it was her birthday yesterday. don't get this wrong when i say that i personally had a shitty time...i know it was all about her but i still had a shitty time. i didn't have the heart to tell her...i'm only typing this cuz the way my relationships go, this shit will never become issue cuz something will happen to fuck things up...maybe i could write a song about it...fuck i'm an idiot.
the actual reason i'm writing this is not cuz of that...i think i'm still a little drunk and needed to get that out. anyway, i'm writing this to ask some questions. can someone give me the definition of a friendship? has anyone ever had the experience of thinking that someone was a friend, only to find out that this "friend" only ever gave a shit cuz she was into your roommate? ...even though you'd known the bitch for years? ever felt fuckin used by someone you trusted? if that's ever happened, have you ever had said "friend" bump into you at a bar and pretend like they give a shit, "i miss hanging out with you"...followed promptly by you trying to be nice and not head butt said "friend"? not that it's been a recent thing...and not that i'm making it obvious to the person that it's them...i just wanted to know...
i can't even pretend...i'm pretty pissed. it's not like it's the first time i've had this happen in my life but this sucks cuz i thought this person wasn't stupid. this leads to another question...have you ever been wrong? i have...recently. i could leave it at this but i guess i don't feel good enough yet for this words-to-paper rant. i'm a really passive person...honestly, but this chewed me right up. i shoulda figured this was coming cuz it's not the first time this person did something similar for their own purpose. i'm sure that with all this said, this person is either gonna hate me big time (another name to chalk up to the list), or try to apologize like a moron and promise once more to call and hang out. i have some advice to said person - do option 1 if you think i'm really gonna give a fuck more than i do...do option 2 but don't expect me to take you seriously...option 3 is to take number 2 seriously (now pay close attention), stop just saying you're gonna call and actually do it...when you aren't doing it out of guilt. now i feel better...peace
zwixxx