i'm filled with a rage and there's nothing else to call it
coming from a family filled with bigotry and alcoholics
i'm pissed cuz no one will benefit from my knowledge
all because i never took the time to finish college
i mean this, i'm a genius, yet some dumb asses
will make a million dollars because they passed some classes
years ago - a tragedy, my son passed and
now my girl left me for another dude, i done had it
i really don't know how i deal with the insanity
after the laughter comes the tears, how simple can it be?
no one understands, not friends or family
sometimes i think not even they're fans of me
so some nights i lay starin' at the sky's canopy
lost in deep thoughts of my fantasies
pushing away the pain of the life God handed me
there's gonna have to be some serious words between the Man and me
i feel like i'm burning with a rage inside
my soul just crawled into a cage and died
so take a look at the scribbles in this sacred book
cuz the hate has shook my tears on the page i cried
i'm filled with a rage to the point i'm fed up
being drown by my problems and i can't keep my head up
i feel like a loose cannon but smilin' on the surface
no idea what'll happen next, feelin' violent and i'm nervous
that one day i'll no longer be silent cuz i'm worthless
fearing that the truth is all my talent has no purpose
i try so hard to be open-minded and compromise
but everytime i open up to someone, i get stomped by lies
held down, gagged and bound, beaten and sodomized
hopin' it will be over one day and i travel beyond the skies
cuz my whole life's been hell, heaven's the only destination
left, see, cuz death creep when my breath seep during meditation
it's just so hard to keep hope alive
when you're provoked inside and the pain broke ya pride
and that's where i'm at down to my last nerve
the rage got my thoughts pushin' ab-surd
i feel like i'm burning with a rage inside
my soul just crawled into a cage and died
so take a look at the scribbles in this sacred book
cuz the hate has shook my tears on the page i cried
i'm filled with a rage and i know it ain't healthy
so i'm addressing you - can you help me?
but you turn away cuz you dont know what to tell me
all you have is the empty rhetoric you try to sell me
i beg for real help but it falls on deaf ears
maybe it'd just be better if i left here
cuz i get pushed to the point where i shed tears
and in the shadows of my life i see death near
so what can i do? how did it get like this?
why do they constantly persecute the righteous
i mean i've been told i'm made in God's likeness
but i feel he's ignoring me even while i write this
and so i stand alone feelin' the pressure of strain
to the biggest measure again of no pleasure but pain
and so hopefully eventually i'll know a day
when i turn the page and my burnin' rage go away
i feel like i'm burning with a rage inside
my soul just crawled into a cage and died
so take a look at the scribbles in this sacred book
cuz the hate has shook my tears on the page i cried
© 2003 Joshua Stewart