 |
 |
| NAKED WEAPON. Starring - Maggie Q - Anya - Daniel Wu - Jewel Lee. Director - Ching Siu-Tung. 2002. I watched “Naked Weapon” with two friends the other night and we had such a great time. Yeah, the dialogues are stupid, the plot is stupid, in fact, the whole movie is fucking stupid – which is exactly why it is so much fun. It’s like “Desperado,” except, of course, that one is a MASTERPIECE. Anyway, “Naked Weapon” is ninety minutes of solid B-movie entertainment that is so shameless it actually becomes good. Instead of picking on the horrendous acting or gigantic plot holes, why not just accept them, laugh at them and have a good time? Essentially, the film is about a powerful crime syndicate led by a Madam M (Wong Pui-ha Almen), who abducts young girls from all over the world, brings them to a remote island, and trains them into deadly assassins. If this makes a lot of sense to you, you should resume taking your medication. This is no doubt one of the most outrageous plots of the year, but who cares? I, for one, find it hugely entertaining. There are a dozen cat fights and the gore is not like anything I would expect from a film aimed primarily at commercial success. And what’s more, there are these hilarious scenes in between where the girls express their “feelings and desperation” as if we really care. Some of them are downright funny, like this girl who said “it’s so unfair, it’s been hell since day one,” as if she has just been struck by the idea after six years in captivity. Eventually, as one may easily guess, none but three of the girls survive the training. They are Charlene (Maggie Q), Katt (Anya) and Jing (Jewel Lee, some kung-fu champion I think), who will eventually become professional assassins that kill by sleeping with their targets, giving them steamy massages and twisting their spines in the process. Now, that’s about the most stupid assassination technique I have ever heard of, but I guess we all understand that this whole deal about female assassins and “killing men when they are at their weakest” is bullshit that serves only one purpose: to let Maggie Q and Anya shed their clothes in front of the camera and give middle aged men sordid pleasure. In that respect, “Naked Weapon” delivers, especially considering a surprise treat by Maggie Q, if you know what I mean. Maggie Q’s real life ex-boyfriend, Daniel Wu, plays CIA agent Jack, who, of course, has a heart of gold and wants to rescue Maggie from the clutches of Madam M. In fact, this guy is so noble he actually pushes her away when Maggie Q tries to screw him… after she gets hit by a dart doped with aphrodisiac, now that’s another hilarious story. “Naked Weapon” is directed by Ching Siu-tung, who is more famous for his work on choreography. And it shows. “Naked Weapon” is filled with high power kung-fu action which, although not that impressive, will undoubtedly appeal to the Western audience. In fact, you just know for whom this movie is made when the all-Chinese cast speaks only English. Wong Jing, who takes writing credit for this movie, is renowned for being the Hong Kong Jerry Bruckheimer except his movies are often dumb low budget comedies made for the sole purpose of a quick cash-in. “Naked Weapon” carries his usual trademarks, but on the technical side, it is surprisingly stronger than many other Hong Kong productions. The cinematography is top notch, while the score matches the beat of the action. This is not just another piece of vulgarity carved out of crap, and as I have said, if you can view it with the right state of mind, it is solid B-movie entertainment. 6******stars. © 2003 Marcus Chan NATURAL BORN VIEWERS. |
| . |
|
|
 |
 |