Timeframe: Postgame. It's not like that really matters though...

After a morning bout of sex, Cid took a shower. "Well, fuck! This water is too fucking cold!"

Shera was cooking breakfast as the blond walked out with only a towel wrapped around his waist. "I'm sorry Cid. I had to use all the hot water to cook breakfast because the stove isn't working."

"Damnit woman!" Cid stormed back to his room where Vincent was crying. "Now what?!"

"I saw a spider under the bed and it scared me!" The ex-Turk's eyes were even redder from his crying.

"For fuck's sake!" Cid crawled under the bed with a ducky slipper in search of the soon-to-be-squished arachnid.

Chaos saw his chance. Without warning, Vincent transformed into his demon form. He grabbed Cid and easily snapped his neck, laughing victoriously. Then he changed back to leave the frail man next to the dead body of his lover. "Oh gods, what have a I done? I don't deserve to live!" He grabbed his gun and promptly shot himself in the head.

Thankfully, both men had a Final Attack-Life materia combo equipped.Vincent on a bracer Cid had made him promise never to remove, and the pilot on an amulet around his neck (it had been a gift from his lover). Once back to the land of the living, Cid stopped Vincent from trying to impale himself on the tie rack in the closet.

"Fuck Vince, if I was mad at ya, I'd...I'd... throw ya out a damn window or soemthing!"

That remark led to Cid pulling Vincent back thorugh the window he'd jumped out of (it was only ground level...). The sobbing Vincent drapped himself over Cid, repenting loudly for his mistakes.

Of course, as Cid had long ago lost his towel, he only saw one course of action to help Vincent...

This sexual episode lasted only 20 minutes or so, after which Vincent stepped into the kitchen. "Good morning, Shera."

The female made a slight 'hmm' noise in reply, then went into her room. She returned shortly, now dressed army style, right down to the combat boots (to which she had added sharp steel spikes). "Vincent, how about we go practice shooting?" She indicated a rifle slung over her shoulder.

Getting his gun from the bedroom, Vincent met up with Shera in the backyard. "OK, I go first. Hold this." Shera handed him a bullseye target to hold.

"Um, is this such a good idea?"

"Don't argue!"

"Y-Yes ma'am!"

Shera fired a couple of times, but still didn't really know how to aim correctly, so she missed the ex-Turk. So far.

"SHERA! What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" Cid shouted from a nearby window.

"Just trying to kill some time, honeybuns!" She smiled sweetly as she some more.

"Honeybuns?! Where the fuck did--AARGH!" The shout proved Shera's aim was getting to the point where she was actually hitting things now.

Shera squealed and ran inside. Vincent, on the other hand, was on the ground sobbing. "It's all my fault! If only I had blocked the bullet with my body! WAAAAAH!"

A couple minutes later, a revived Cid walked outside to find Vincent making a noose out of some extra clothesline. "Would you stop that Vince!"

"B-But it's my fault you got shot..."

"Fuck that. It's that Shera's fucking fault. She was shooting that stupid things without even knowing how to use the damn thing!" He gently held the sobbing brunet, but his hands started to wander south. Way south.

Half an hour later, the satisfied boys strolled into the house hand in hand. "Hey Vince, why don't you wait in our room while I talk to Shera for a sec?"

"All right Cid." Vincent smiled as he received a kiss on his forehead before departing.

Cid watched him go, then took a deep breath before going to Shera's room. "Hey, I'm coming in."

Shera was now outfitted in her Shadow Ninja Outfit, with everything but her eyes covered in black. Cid could only sigh, "Hell Shera, not with the silent ninja shit again." He took a moment to looka round the room. It seemed Shera's sewing skills were improving nicely, as proven by her newest 'Vincent Voodoo Doll'. She went through them on a weekly basis.

"Fine, if ya won't talk to me, at least listen. Stop trying to kill Vince! For the hundredth fucking time!"

Ninja Shera merely spun around and and continued to practice using her ninja stars on a pillow.

"Can't fucking have no fucking peace in my own fucking house." Cid shuffled over to his room, happily surprised that Vincent was not crying or trying to commit suicide. "Heya Vince."

"Cid... I'm feeling a little... amorous..." The ex-Turk seductively licked his lips.

//Here we go again.// "Just lemme get undressed Vince."

"No, NOW!" Vincent sprung off the bed and tackled Cid, rippign his clothes off. It didn't take long for them to make love. Probably 10 minutes, give or take a few for Cid complaining about rug burn. "Vince, stop this shit! What the hell you crying for NOW?!"

"B-Because I hurt you! I must atone for my sins against you!" Vincent pulled up his pants and ran to the kitchen, while Cid hurridly tried to find some article of clothing that hadn't been torn to microscopic pieces.

In the kitchen meanwhile, Ninja Shera had given way to Tight Leather Assasin Shera (trademark, don't ya know-_^). She was sharpening a dagger with a small wedgestone.

Vincent ran around the kitchen, searching for some implement to kill himself with. "Aha! With this spork I shall end my monstrous being!"

"Waitwaitwait! Let me help you Vincent!"

Thankfully, before Shera could help our angsting hero, Cid walked in, wearing a bedspread wrapped around his body and trailing behind him. "Shera, put that fucking shit dagger down and lave him the hell alone!"

Shera sighed and continued sharpening her weapon, confident she'd have another opportunity sooner or later. Cid had to do a wild tackle since Vincent was still holding his spork. And although they mgiht have had another chance to 'do the deed' (as the comforter had slipped off Cid), Shera wasn't a voyeur and would have beaten the livign crap out of both of them.

Then again, the fact that Cid had been stabbed with the spork during the tackle could have also been a factor. His amulet activated and saved him again, so he acted quickly and grabbed Vincent, intending to toss him in a closet before he could try to hurt himself again. Of course, Vincent started sniffling so that canceled that idea. "Well, let's go back to my room Vince! I have an idea!"