(Note: Timeline; 4 weeks after Starsky comes home from the hospital after being shot down by Gunther.)
Hutch's POV
I couldn't stand the little bastard, but I had to at least try to tolerate him for Starsky's sake.
He wanted to see his little brother. Starsky had been home from the hospital nearly 4 weeks now and Nick had come out from New York when I told him that his brother really wanted to see him.
When I picked him up at the airport you could tell all he wanted to do was get this "visit" over with but his and Starsky's mom had insisted that he see his big brother.
His Mom had broken her leg and her Doctor had said absolutely no to
a trip cross-country for at least a few more months.
Besides she called every night and talked to her oldest son and when
she was finished with that conversation she always talked to me and quizzed
me on just how her "baby" really was doing. She is a beautiful lady
and she loves her son very much. I always try to reassure her that Starsk
will never want for anything as long as I am alive.
Nick had only been in his brother's bedroom a few minutes when he left with some lame excuse that he had to take a leak.
I walked out behind him and closed the door to Starsky's bedroom and turned on Nick Starsky.
Why you little selfish bastard! I can't believe this! You've only been here for a few days and you make an excuse everytime you go sit with your brother so you can get out of his room as fast as you can.
"Hutch", Nick said to me. Please listen to me, this is so hard for me seeing Davey this way.........so thin, so weak and those scars! God, those scars are, are so awful. I can't look at them. He doesn't look like my big brother anymore.
I tore into him, those scars are what!?
Nick, what do you mean he's not your brother anymore, I wanted to kill the little bastard. Yea, your brother looks like death warmed over, what the hell did you expect him to look like?! He almost died!
I tried to compose myself some.
Look, Nick, if you can't handle it any better then you just did you can take your sorry ass back to New York and stay there because the last thing your brother needs is for you to look at him with revulsion.
Nick, he doesn't have the strength to deal with you and your insecurities right now.........everyday is a struggle for him to try to get better.
Nick just looked at me and sort of grinned.
You know, Hutch, my BROTHER loves YOU more then he could ever love me. And you love my brother more then I can ever love him.
The comments were dripping with sarcasm.
I'll leave in a few days and I'll tell Maw what she wants to hear, that her precious Davey is coming along just fine.
I thought to myself, if you left this minute it wouldn't be too soon for me.
Nick picked up his jacked off the couch and walked out the door.
I walked back into my partner's room.
I had seen the look of sadness and disbelief on Starsky's face when Nick had seen Starsky's chest before I had buttoned up his pajama top for him.
Then Nick had made that lame excuse of his and had practically run out of his brother's room.
I looked at my partner.
He was clutching the blanket tight to his chest and his eyes were clouded over with tears.
Hey, Buddy................
God, what do I say.
Starsk, Nick's just a kid and he's never seen gunshot wounds or surgical scars before.
I had to try to soften up what Nick had done by walking out on his borther. Maybe what I had just said might help just a little.
You know things like this can be pretty scary to some folks.
Starsky looked up at me, Yea, I guess, but it doesn't seem to keep you from doing for me or keep you from touching me or holding me when I need you to.
His eyes were filling up with tears and his voice was trembling.
Aww, it never could, and it never will, Buddy, it never will.
And then a lone tear slid down my best friend's cheek and he reached up toward me and I knew what we both needed..........Me and Thee.............
So I bent down to cradle him ever so gently in my arms and he just hung on to me like a lifeline and I held my most precious burden close to my heart.......right where it would always belong.
The End