Trying to Conceive

A couple tried for a while to conceive a child but had no luck.
So, they went to the doctor. The doctor advised them to continue
trying on their own, but they were sure there was a clinal reason
for infertility. So the doctor examined the woman, ran a few
tests, and determined she could in fact get pregnant. The doctor
then wanted a sperm sample from the man. He gave the couple a
sealed sterile jar, and sent them into an exam room to get the
sample.

They were in the room for an hour, and it was time for the clinic
to close when the couple came out. They looked very embarrassed,
and produced an empty jar. The doctor looked at the jar, looked
at the couple, and asked if there was some problem. The man
looked at the ground and said,

"Well, doc, I hate to admit I had a problem with this. I tried,
but my hands are really tired. I tried with my left hand, I tried
with my right hand, I tried with both hands, nothing. So my wife
tried to help me, and then SHE tried with her left hand, and
tried with her right hand, she pulled and pulled, but it just
didn't help.

"Then we found some vaseline in a cabinet. She rubbed it really
good under the edge but that didn't help either. She tried using
her mouth, but after trying that for a while, she just ended up
with a sore jaw. We couldn't figure out what else to do, so we
came out here."

The doctor said, "Do you often have a problem with impotence?"
The man said, "Impotence!? Hell no, doc, we couldn't get the damn
jar open!"