The Pride and the Shame

by: Ricia Fedora
Disclaimer: Any Darkwing characters I mention belong to Disney. All other characters are so being mine, Ricia's and so not being yours. Got it? Good. Let's move on.

Thanks to: Oh where to begin. Aero for helping me create Ricia Fedora at The Old Haunt and for threatening my life if I didn't write the next part, John for listening to my ramblings about the watch and helping me sort out some stuff, Lily for telling me the name of the Dean, Douglas Adams for inventing the term "Professor of Chronology", Renee and Chris for the whole Ricia image and The Viscount for the gift of the pocketwatch.

***************

"All the time in the world"
"All the time in the world"
"Mom?? Dad??"
"MOM? DAD?"

Ricia Fedora woke with a start. Her pounding heartbeat keeping steady time with the hundreds of clocks surrounding her. Clocks set to every time zone. All moving forward steadily. Ricia slipped out of bed and walked quietly to the kitchen for some coffee. "Just a nightmare." She sank to the floor. So long ago. It happened so long ago. She didn't want to remember. She closed her eyes and listened to the ticking. The beautiful ticking always soothed her nerves. The phone rang disturbing her meditation.

"Hello?....No, sir I realize what time it is, I was....Yes I like my job very much...I...but...I'll be right down." She hung up the phone and sighed. The Dean of Saint Canard University was a small man. Small in stature, mind, ideas, generousity, heart among various other things. Ricia made a face at the phone and went to get ready for work.

********

"Okay. Now if we combine chrotons and electrons in a steady flux what will be the result?" Ricia said to the group of college students sitting in front of her. They stared at her like deer caught in headlights. Ricia sighed. Thank Chronos it was Friday. She looked at the clock. Five minutes to go. "Okay, I'm tired, you're tired, just read the chapter next time, okay?" Students mumbled and nodded and filed out of the room" Ricia flopped down on her chair and stared at her ceiling. She didn't hear the door open.

"Ah. Professor Fedora. Slacking off I see."

Groan. Not him. Not now. Ricia kept her eyes glued to the ceiling on the off chance he'd think she was dead.

"Professor Fedora!!!"

Damn.

"Yes Dean? May I help you?", Ricia asked in a polite tone.

The Dean scowled. His opinion of Ricia Fedora was a well broadcasted. He thought she was arrogant and didn't know her place. Mostly he thought chronology was a waste of time science. This was because he couldn't profit from it. He had tried threatened to cut off her funding but she seemed not to care one way or the other. Infuriating woman.

"Fedora, your class ends at 4:45, not 4:40!", he yelled at her. He didn't really care when she let her students out. He just needed a reason to chew her out.

Ricia looked at him like he was a three year old. "I'll try to remember that. Now if you're quite done, I have a date."

"With who?"

"With me."

The dean turned and gawked. Standing in the door was a elder duck. His hair had long gone gray, but his eyes still possessed most of their youthful sparkle. The dean made some strange straggled noises and walked out. The second he left Ricia started to laugh. "Oh Ian! That was priceless! His face!"

Ian Featherton, her father's eldest friend and Ricia's honorary uncle chuckled, "He had it coming. Course now the rumors will fly"

Ricia shrugged. "Let them. Nobody respects me around here anyway."

Ian smiled sadly at her and placed a hand on her shoulder. "C'mon let's go to dinner."

********

Ian wiped his face with his napkin "So Ricia, how are you doing these days?"

Ricia flinched. Here it came.

"Any men in your mind?"

Bullseye!

Ricia blushed and fidgeted. "Um...Uncle Ian I don't have time for that. I've got my students and my studies."

"Ricia, this is important. You know a new generation of Fedoras must be born! You're the last one..."

Ricia cut him off. "I know that! Don't you think I realize the importance of having a kid? Dad told me all the stories and explained what will happen if I don't continue the bloodline!" Ricia closed her eyes and saw her father standing there. "Now, Bright Eyes, our family is very important. We need to keep time going forward. Our pocketwatch will keep everything going steady. And our bloodline will go on forever. Right my daughter? But don't worry. You have all the time in the world. All the time in the world."

"Ricia? Ricia, are you alright?" Ian stared at her with concern.

Ricia's eyes flew open and she looked in shock at Ian. "I'm...I'm fine. I'm fine. I need to go. I've got papers to grade." She stumbled out of her chair and fled the restaurant.

She walked to her apartment, mind spinning. Suddenly a gang of thugs surrounded her. Ricia backed away a little. Where was that stupid vigalante Darkwing Duck when you needed him. Probably stopping Quackerjack from taking over the city with exploding Super-balls or something. The leader of the gang spoke up.

"Hello, beautiful. Nice night isn't it? Now be a good little girl and give us your money."

Little girl? She was probably five years his senior. She reached into her jacket pocket. She never carried a purse if she could help it. "I don't have money but I do have this." She pulled out a gold pocketwatch. The thugs took a step towards her then there was a green flash. Ricia looked tiredly at the now frozen thugs. She shook her head. Not frozen just ahead of the rest of time. She chuckled as a cloud of blue smoke appeared.

"I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the rusty gears that stop your clock! I am Darkwing Duck!!!"

Ricia nodded respectfully. "Mister Darkwing." She swept a hand towards the criminals. "They're all yours." She walked away leaving a baffled Darkwing to collect the seemingly imobile thieves.

********

Ricia slammed her apartment door. She didn't need this. She wanted a normal life. She wanted everyone to leave her alone. She took out the gold pocketwatch and placed in on the table. It mocked her. "Ha ha! Reluctant Time Keeper! I own you! I own you!", it seemed to say. Ricia rubbed her eyes tiredly. She walked to her bedroom and sat at her desk. It was a big English desk that had been passed from one Fedora to the next. Family was so important. Ricia reached up and took off her black fedora, another gift from her father. She smiled remembering what a fit her mother had had when her father presented Ricia with the old hat. Her mother had insisted in wasn't lady-like for a young girl to wear men's clothing. Ricia laughed out loud and glanced over at a full length mirror. Dressed in a man's business suit completely with tie, her mother would have spazzed out completely if she could see her daughter now. Ricia preferred the style of old fashioned suits to the modern "power woman" suits.

Her eyes swept up and down. She was pretty enough in a strange sort of way. Brown and black hair, a bizarre combination of her mother and father's hair colors. Green eyes which stood out intensely from her purple feathers. Ah...the purple feathers, a true enigma. Her mother's feathers had been white and her father's a cream color. Rumors spread like wild fire when Ricia was born. The tawdry affair of Calinda Fedora was all that was talked about for months. Professor Jakob Fedora, former head of the Chronology Department at SCU, just smiled and shrugged. He knew Ricia was his blood. The proof was in the watch. Only a one of Fedora blood could touch the watch and Ricia had clasped the watch soon after she was born. "A true born Time Keeper" her father had insisted.

Now, he and her mother were dead. Ripped away from her violently in a flash of revenge and murder. Now all that remained of the Fedora Time Keepers was a 32 year old female college professor. Ricia tossed the hat into her closet. She could feel the pressure pounding in her brain. It wasn't as easy as everyone seemed to think it was. Men didn't like woman like her. She was intelligent and eccentric. Most of her dates booked when they saw the clocks. At SCU she'd been deemed a nasty wench who considered herself above men, so it can be guessed how popular she was there.

Ricia picked up a magazine laying on the floor. It had opened to the Personals section. Hmmmm...now there was an idea. Ricia picked up a pen and began to write:

Intelligent, strong-willed SFD
ISO intelligent, patient man
with a good sense of humor
Species not important.

Ricia stared at the ad she had written. She shrugged. Why not? She reached for the phone to call her ad in.

************

Ricia sighed as Dean Tightbill continued to blab on about things that didn't interest her in the slightest.

"So blah blah blah fired blah blah blah."

Wait.

What was that?

"So blah blah blah fired blah blah blah."

Fired? Fired?

"Who's fired?" , Ricia asked shocked.

Dean Tightbill smirked. "Why, you Miss Fedora. We're scrapping your whole department. This college will finally be rid of your whole cursed family!"

Ricia shook with rage. "You can't do this! I have students! What about them? What about their studies?"

He shrugged. "They'll have to find other courses of study. I've finally got you Fedora! Your jobless and your joke science has been wiped from Saint Canard University! And there is nothing you can do about any of this. I win Fedora."

Ricia's eyes narrowed as reached for her pocketwatch. "Oh....really?"

*******

Ricia cleaned out the desk in her office. She looked at the portraits hanging on the wall. Her great-grandfather, her grandfather and her father. Three generations of Chronology professors. Her portrait was supposed to be added when she got tenure. She wiped her eyes. She'd have to remember to ask Ian to put the paintings somewhere safe or Tightbill was likely to have a bonfire when he woke up.

She walked across the campus. She glanced over at a group of students laughing hysterically. The source of their amusement was what appeared to be a statue of the Dean stripped to his underwear. Ricia smiled softly. "You lose Tightbill", she whispered.

*******

Tick tick tick.

Ricia stared at the wall.

Tick tick tick.

She didn't blink or move a muscle.

Then....

Every clock chimed the hour. Hundreds upon hundreds of clocks ringing and clanging.

"Your joke science has been wiped from Saint Canard University"

"Joke science"

"Joke science"

Ringing and clanging

"You're the last one Ricia"

"You're the last!"

"The last"

Ringing and clanging

"All the time in the world"

"All the time in the world"

Time

Ringing

Time

Clanging

Then it stopped

Tick tick tick

*************

"So you see that's how I won the Hyzine Award for chicken farming."

Ricia nodded. Her personal ad had worked. Sort of. She had arranged a date with a Mister Quackren. So far he was boring, rude and obnoxious She smiled sweetly and said, "That's wonderful. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go before I beat your head in with the napkin holder. Good night."

Ricia walked out of the restaurant. She seemed to be doing that alot lately. She was sick of people. Maybe she'd just become a hermit and live in a cave. Normal flow of time be damned. Chaos sounded kind of nice.

She found her self walking past the old lighthouse. Now there was the perfect place. Great view. Nobody to bug you. Really good reading light.

"Look out!"

Huh?

WHAM!

Ricia was sprawled on the ground. Next to her was a slightly dented toaster.

"Are you alright?"

Ricia groaned. "I think so."

The stranger looked annoyed. "Not you! The toaster!"

Ricia stared at him. He was a rat type creature, dressed in a strange jumpsuit with a battery on his back and a plug hat on his head. She recognized him from the papers. Megavolt.

When confronted with a toaster wielding super villian, the sensible course is to scream and run.

Ricia stood up and glared at him. "That toaster nearly gave me a concussion!"

Megavolt looked at her. "You put a big dent in him"

"He started it!"

"Did not"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too...I'm not having this conversation. Look I want an apology and I want one right now!"

"From the toaster?"

"I don't care who apologizes! I'm in pain and I just got fired and had a really bad date! I'm in a very bad mood."

Megavolt considered this, at least he looked like he was considerng it. He could have been thinking about bagels. At last he looked at her. "You're hurt?"

Ricia blew up. "No! I always bleed from my forehead!"

He backed away a little. She continued to seethe at him til the dizziness took over and she collasped.

*********

She awoke in a small room, her head bandaged. It took her a second to realize she was inside the lighthouse. Megavolt sat staring at her.

"Um...are you okay?"

Ricia looked warily at him. "Who? Me or the toaster?"

"You."

"I've got a headache but I'm okay."

"He's sorry. The toaster is sorry"

Ricia's facial expression softened. "How is he? Is he okay?"

Megavolt looked at her in surprise. "You really care?"

"Of course. I know how it is. I have...clocks."

"Clocks?"

Ricia closed her eyes. "Clocks. Hundreds of clocks. And I know all their voices and all their songs. Joy. Fear. Anger." She opened her eyes and gazed steadily at Megavolt. "So you see I understand such things."

Megavolt just continued to stare at her. She sighed and glanced at her pocketwatch.

"That's nice."

Suddenly Ricia remembered she was with a supervillian. She clutched her watch to her. "You can't have it! You can't touch it!"

Megavolt tilted his head. "Why?"

Ricia blinked. "Um......" Truth be told she had no idea. Her father had said something terrible would happen if somebody besides a Fedora touched the watch. "You can't touch the watch cause you're not a Fedora."

Megavolt blinked in confusion. "I can't touch the watch cause I'm not a hat?"

Ricia laughed in spite of herself. "No! My last name is Fedora. Only people with Fedora blood can touch the Time Keeper's pocketwatch."

Megavolt just nodded and wandered off to check on Mr. Toaster.

Ricia sat in the bed looking around her. The room was filled with odds and ends, most of which we're a complete mystery to her. She got up and walked over to something that looked like it was made of coat hangers and an old washing machine. She reached over to press the button. Suddenly a gloved hand grabbed hers. "Don't", Megavolt commanded.

Ricia started in surprise. "I...I didn't mean...I was just...um... How's the toaster?"

"He wants to see you."

"Lead the way"

Ricia and Megavolt spent a good part of the day talking to different household appliances. Megavolt introduced her to the blender. She was a willful creature who did what she liked. Ricia admitted it reminded her of her own blender. Megavolt assured her most blenders were like that. The dryer was a old and wise machine who'd seen many things. Ricia listens enraptured by his tales of lights and darks, of delicates and permanant press. She listened with pity as he sobbed out his story of a shrunken sweater.

Just as Megavolt was introducing the desklamp Ricia looked at her watch and gasped. "I have to go! My clocks need to be wound!"

Megavolt looked disappointed. "Do you have to?"

Ricia nodded pulling on her coat. "They need to be wound. Some of them anyway. A few are self-winding...some are digital. But I need to get home. Thank you for everything." She patted the toaster gently, quickly hugged Megavolt and ran out the door.

Megavolt's eyes widened as he stared at the closed door.

Then he smiled.

*******

Ricia fumbled for her keys. A eerie silence met her ears. She was late but...not all the clocks should have stopped. She opened the door and saw the reason for the silence.

The mess was incredible. Clock parts strewn all over the place, splintered wood and broken glass littered the carpet. Ricia picked her way through it desperately looking for something intact. Everything was destroyed.

Trying to keep herself from screaming she reached for the phone to called the police.

*******

"Oh my God. Oh my God."

"Ma'am?"

"My clocks. All my beautiful clocks."

"Ma'am?"

Ricia ignored the cop. She felt like her whole world had collapsed.

"Ma'am, we need to ask you some questions. Was anything actually taken?"

Ricia shook her head. "No, they just br-broke everything."

"Are you sure. I mean there were so many clocks. You wouldn't know--"

Ricia cut him off sharply. "I'd know!"

"Why would anyone come in your apartment to break clocks?"

"Cause the lock on Timepieces R Us was too complicated! How the hell should I know?"

"Ma'am I understand how you feel but..."

"You understand?? You don't understand squat! When's the last time someone broke in your house and smashed your most precious possessions? Get the hell out of my apartment! Go do your job and leave me alone! I don't know who did this! If I knew I wouldn't need you!"

"Ma'am..."

"GET OUT!!!"

The cop dashed out the door, which slammed behind him.

Ricia fell to her knees and sobbed. It was so quiet. So damn quiet.

Tick tick tick

Ricia reached into her jacket and pulled out her pocketwatch. Crying she clutched it like a life preservor. She reached over for the phone and dialed.

"Hello?"

"Uncle Ian?"

"Ricia? Are you okay?"

"No...oh God. Uncle Ian they destroyed everything. My clocks!"

"What? No...I didn't think it would happen to you."

"What would happen? Ian do you know who did this?"

"Ricia I want you to hide! Go to a friend's house and stay there! We can't afford to lose you. Not now!"

"Why? What's..."

"Just do as I say!"

Ian hung up. Ricia stared at the phone. A friend's house? She didn't have any friends! None mentioning anyway. In the corner of her eye she spotted her toaster lying on the floor. She stared at it. "Oh don't be stupid! He's not going to hide me from...whatever it is Uncle Ian wants me to hide from." The toaster just continued to lie there." Ricia glared. "Fine! You win!" She walked out the door and headed towards the lighthouse.

***********

Megavolt adjusted something in his latest invention. He glanced up at his toaster. "No the pretty lady isn't coming back! Stop asking that." He stood up. "There now, my little one let's hear your first words." He pressed a button.

Knock knock. "Megavolt, are you in there?"

Megavolt stared in amazement at the new device. "You sound like Ricia."

"Megavolt!!"

Megavolt spun toward the door surprised. He opened it to find a very distraught Ricia standing there.

"Ricia?"

She flung herself at him and hugged him tightly. "Oh Megs! They broke all my clocks. Uncle Ian said I should hide at a friends house ,but I don't have any friends except for you and I was wondering if I could stay here! Just for a little while."

Ricia let go of Megavolt and looked at him pleadingly.

"Um....okay."

"Oh thank you!"

********

Ricia sat at Megavolt's table, toaster in her lap. She had told Megavolt the whole story. Her voice only shook a few times.

Megavolt looked sadly at her. "Do you know who your Uncle Ian is going after?"

Ricia shook her head. "It probably has something to do with me being a Time Keeper."

Megavolt walked over to his latest invention. He reached for a screwdriver. "What's a Time Keeper?"

Ricia petted the toaster. "We keep time flowing forward. If the Fedoras die out chaos will result. There won't be anybody to control where time goes. Uncle Ian is worried I'll get killed so...here I am."

Megavolt looked confused then looked over at Ricia."You're the last Fedora."

Ricia looked down. "I am. I have no children. If I don't have one there won't be anybody to claim the title." For some reason mentioning her need for children made Ricia blush horribly. Thankfully Megavolt didn't seem to notice.

He smiled. "I'm glad."

Ricia blinked. "You're glad I have no children?"

"No...I'm glad you're here."

Ricia smiled. "I am too."

For awhile they said nothing to each other. Megavolt continued to work and Ricia stared off into space, petting the toaster gently.

*******

"It's a couch."

"I'm aware of that thank you."

Ricia looked at the coach. It was a bizarre shade of orange. It looked like it wasn't so much created as thrown up.

Megavolt handed her a pillow and blanket. "Night!" He walked out of the room leaving Ricia to contemplate the coach some more.

******

A figure stared at the lighthouse. "Now Miss Fedora, you can't hide from Mranonak." He took a drag from his cigarette. "Soon I shall control the universe and time will be a hated distant memory." He flicked the cigarette into the bay and started towards the dark lighthouse.

*****

Ricia sat on the coach making a mental note to have it's builders killed. She suddenly heard a crash. She stood up. "Megavolt?"

Silence.

"Er...Mr. Toaster?"

Mranonak grabbed her from behind. She screamed and kicked him hard. He yelled and let go. She dashed across the room and pulled out her pocketwatch.

Megavolt dashed into the room. "Ricia? Are you...?" He looked at the newcomer. His hands crackled with electricity.

Ricia raised her watch and pressed the button.

Now for those of you who were wondering, here's the answer to the question: "What happens when you combine electrons and chrotons in a steady flux?"

KA-BOOM!

Ricia was flung backwards and slammed agaist the wall. She slumped to the floor.

*******

"Ow...what happened?"

Megavolt was holding her trying to get her to wake up. "You're okay?"

Ricia let him help her up. "No, I'm not. What is it with you? Whenever I'm near you I get a head injury!"

Megavolt looked hurt. "I'm sorry."

Ricia suddenly felt guilty. "Never mind. Where's our uninvited guest?"

Megavolt pointed over to a tied up and gagged canine.

Ricia grabbed the gag and ripped it out of his mouth. "Talk. Now."

Mranonak glared at her. "Burn in hell, spawn of Chronos!"

Megavolt shot a bolt of electricity his way. "Don't talk to her like that."

Ricia was touched by his defense of her.

The canine sneered. "What's the matter Fedora? Can't take care of yourself. Got to have your boyfriend do the dirty work." This made both Megavolt and Ricia blush. Ricia hit Mranonak across the face.

"I can take fine care of myself! And he's not my boyfriend!" She turned to stare at Megavolt. "Are you?"

Megavolt looked lost. "Um...I'm..."

Mranonak rolled his eyes. "Hello! Evil clock smashing guy here!"

Ricia stopped gazing at Megavolt and turned slowly towards the tied up intruder. "You...smashed the clocks! You broke my...my friends!"

"Oh how observent Fedora. You obviously didn't get your intelligence from your father."

"What do you know of my father?"

"We had some dealings."

Ricia stared at him. She stared closely at him.

I control you now Time-Keeper

Mom? Dad?

Now the order ends

MOM? DAD?

"No...it can't be. It can't be."

Megavolt touched her arm. "Ricia...?"

Ricia pulled away and looked scared.

"Ricia?"

Mranonak laughed. "You recognize me. I must tell you if I'd known you were there I'd have killed you too."

A deranged howl escaped Ricia's mouth as she lunged for his throat. "Die you son of a-"

"Ricia!"

Ricia turned and stared. She wasn't in the lighthouse anymore. She was in misty nothingness. Her father stood there.

"Daddy?" She ran and hugged him.

"There there. I have a job for you. You must destroy Mranonak. Fire the watch twice."

"You told me I couldn't do that. It could have horrible repercussions!"

"Mranonak is a threat to our way. You need to claim your title of Time Keeper. Now go Bright Eyes. Your boyfriend is concerned about you."

"He's not..."

Jakob Fedora laughed. "Sure he is! You can't lie to me Bright Eyes. You feel something for that man."

Ricia opened her mouth to respond but found herself back in the lighthouse.

Megavolt was staring at her. "Ricia? Are you alright?"

Ricia kissed him on the cheek. "Lovely." She grinned at Mranonak. "Time to die!"

He laughed. "You can't kill me! Only one thing can kill me!"

Ricia continued to smile as she pulled out the watch. "Twice hit. Twice dead."

For the first time, there was genuine fear in Mranonaks eyes.

There was two big flashes of green light.

The chair was empty.

Ricia fell exhausted agaist Megavolt.

Megavolt put his arms around her. "Is he gone?"

Ricia nodded and closed her eyes.

EPILOGUE:

Ian Featherson gazed at Ricia over a cup of coffee. "A super-villian?" Ricia shrugged. "Why not? Could be fun."

Ian looked at her. "I trust you Ricia." He turned and shook Megavolt's hand. "Welcome to the family.

Ricia glared at him. "We're not getting married Uncle Ian!"

Uncle Ian grinned. "Yet."

Megavolt looked at Ricia. "What is he talking about Ricia?"

Ricia shrugged and smiled. "I have no clue Megs. Not a single clue." Her eyes sparkled as she held the electric clock he had presented to her ,and Megavolt seriously wondered what he had gotten himself into.

THE END

Comments? Flames? Marriage proposals? Send them to thericia@excite.com



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