Original Yellow Receipt
Collecting a parcel, the Kenyan way.
In 50 easy-to-follow-steps

By David Hands

The Guide

Step01. Receive your yellow original parcel collection receipt, at your mail box


Step02. Find in which building your parcel is.


Step03. Go there


Step04. Find on which floor of this building your parcel is at.


Step05. Make sure you do not go there between 13:00-14:00. Even though the Post Office is open, the parcel department is closed for lunch


Step06. Enter the room, and find the right counter to go at.


Step07. Wait in cue, once you located the right counter.


Step08. Give your original yellow receipt.


Step09. Prove that you are the person that is mentioned on the original yellow receipt.


Step10. Wait, while the person who you gave your original yellow receipt to, gives it to somebody else behind them.


Step11. Wait, until that somebody else matches the number on your original yellow receipt with the number on your parcel.


Step12. Once your parcel is found wait until the number on your original yellow receipt is written in a big book.


Step13. Receive your parcel. Do not be fooled, this is only the beginning.


Step14. Go to next counter with your parcel and your original yellow receipt


Step15. Wait in cue


Step16. Give your parcel and your original yellow receipt.


Step17. Open your parcel for customs examination.


Step18. Explain what is inside your parcel.


Step19. Watch the customs officer take your parcel (which is now open) and put it under his counter. Do not looked surprised and do not argue.


Step20. Wait until the customs officer stamps your original yellow receipt and calculates (roughly) how much custom duty is and writes the amount on your original yellow receipt. If no duty to be paid go to step 26


Step21. Go to customs cashier with your original yellow receipt and without your parcel.


Step22. Wait in cue


Step23. Give your original yellow receipt to the customs cashier.


Step24. Pay your customs duty


Step25. Get a receipt for payment


Step26. Go to the next counter


Step27. Wait in cue


Step28. Give your original yellow receipt


Step29. Wait until the person behind the bars goes through a whole pile, of other duplicate yellow receipts in order to find your duplicate.


Step30. Once the duplicate is located, collect both duplicate and original yellow receipts.


Step31. Go to next counter with both duplicate and original yellow receipts


Step32. Wait in cue


Step33. Give both duplicate and original yellow receipts to the person, behind more bars.


Step34. Wait until the duplicate and the original yellow receipts are stamped, and the original yellow receipt is given back to you, while the duplicate yellow receipt goes into a pile of other duplicate yellow receipts.


Step35. Take the original yellow receipt to the next counter


Step36. Wait in cue


Step37. Give your original yellow receipt to the person behind the counter


Step38. Prove once more that you are the person who the name appears on the original yellow receipt


Step39. Pay Post Office Charges. Have exact amount, otherwise they will ask you to go out of the building and get change.


Step40. Exchange the original yellow receipt with a new original white receipt. Your original yellow receipt goes in a drawer with more original yellow receipts


Step41. Go back to the counter that kept your parcel.


Step42. Wait in cue


Step43. Give the original white receipt to the person that opened and kept your parcel


Step44. Wait until this person, locates your parcel which is under his counter (gets harder if there was a chance in shift)


Step45. Collect your parcel


Step46. Take parcel and original white receipt to another counter, so they can write in another big book, the number of the original yellow receipt, which was copied on the new original white receipt.


Step47. Walk down the stairs


Step48. Show your original white receipt at the door downstairs in order to prove that everything was done correctly and that you have paid everything that needs to be paid.


Step49. Once everything is cleared walk out,........ go home and.......... cry!!!!


Step50. Unless your are a masochist, if you receive a little original yellow receipt, in your box mail, leave the country


So, if you are my enemy, send me a parcel, if you are my friend, keep it and I'll pick it up, the next time I see you, please!
To collect a parcel it took nine employees of the Kenyan Post and Telecommunications, 48 minutes of my life, and if smoking and drinking was allowed in the building, probably around 7 shots of vodka and half a packet of cigarettes.
God bless the little original yellow
receipts.

 

copyright David Hands

 

 

Other African related pages  

Tingi Tingi     Brazaville     African Photos

 

Home    Africa   Bosnia    Middle East    Photo Gallery    Links    Contact