Playing By Hearts

For Better Or Worst, ONE LIFE`S TO LIVE`S James & Kassie Depaiva Are A Perfect Love Match

           Hard to believe, but One Life To Live`sJames and Kassie DePaiva are almost sassier than their on-screen counterparts, Max  Holden and Blalr Cramer. But underneath all those snappy quips they exchage lies a deep love. James and Kassie tied the knot on May 31th.1996, and almost three years later, Kassie happily declares,"We`re pseudo-neylyweds, but James still does it for me. I think he always will because it is just so right." Here`s why...

Digest: Can you recall when the two of you first met?
Kassie: I was preforming at the Whaler Bar, and I sang a song called, "A Lesson I`ll Never Learn."
James: It was beautiful, and I felt compelled to compliment Kassie on it. But it just so happened she was talking to someone from a record company right at the time I chose to walk up.
Kassie: I thought," Oh my God. He`s making fun."
James: Generally, I do not do genuine things in my life because every time I do, it ends up getting thrown in my face like this. She thought I I was this drunken jerk who was hitting on her or something.
Digest: In 1993, you were brought together again when Kassie was joined ONE LIFE TO LIVE as Blair, Max`s love interest.
James: When I walked into the makeup room and Kassie was there, I thought, "I know her," and I had no idea why. For some reason, we gave each other  a hug hello and I thought,"I need to stay away from this woman. This will be trouble."
Kassie: We were both at very painful times in  our lives, and I think we commiserated on that level. Then we were thrown into a storyline of total tease and passion and we`d do a little rehearsing on the side[laughs].
Digest: So your first impression of James changed?
Kassie: I realized he was just a stinker. Jimmy likes to ruffle your feathers. I have two older brothers, so that type of tit for tat is right up my alley. I gave it back as good as he was giving it!
Digest: Why do you think your marriage works so well?
James: I had two bad marriages, and at a certain point, you realise this is going to take a little more effort on my part[laughs]. One reason we got together is communication. When we had problems, we got some counseling. We aren`t going to let anything get in the way. We`re also pretty much on the same track of where we want to go in our lives, so it`s incredibly comfortable.
Kassie: Now that Jimmy is in my life, it is so much more complete. During the difficult times that we`ve had this past year with finding out about our sons [James Quentin, affectionately called J.Q..] hearing loss --- Jimmy has known when to reach out to me, grab my hand when I needed it. I guess through this time of uncertainty, it`s nice to have someone so solid and so certain in your life.
Digest: How is J.Q. doing?
Kassie: Fine. he`s huge[laughs]. On Janiary 1, he turned into a real 2-year-old, but he`s 19 months!
Digest: When did you first realise there was something wrong with J.Q.`s hearing?
Kassie: I guess the typical things you take for granted --- doors slamming, banging of pots and pans, calling out his name. He didn`t make a peep. It wasn`t until his first birthday that I realised we had to pursue it.
Digest: Will J.Q. be learning sign language?
Kassie: Nope. We have chosen the oral deaf approach, which is teaching him to speak and to listen. He works with a speech therapist five times a week and recently had a cochlear implant. Hopefully, by the time he is in first grade, J.Q. should be able to go to regular school. It is going to be a little bit more difficult for him to commumicate, but we all have a different path. J.Q. is going to go in a little bit of a roundabout way, but he`ll reach his destination.
Digest: Do you think having to deal with J.Q.`s situation made your marriage stronger?
James: Any time you have a bump in your life and you ride through it with someone, it`s going to bring you closer together. I think it tied us together more as a family unit.
Kassie: Our marriage is very, very strong. It`s almost like I don`t even have a choice in the matter. I belong with him and he belongs with me. And our son is a product of that completeness.
Digest: What do you love most about each other?
James: I`d say her generosity of spirit.
Kassie: Proably the things that drives me the craziest about him!
James: That`s a pretty long list, then.
Digest: What is the most romantic thing your husband has ever done for you?
Kassie: On my birthday, we went to, Two If By Sea for dinner. [Kassie whips out a poem her husband wrote that evening and recites it.]
Digest: Do you consider yourself to be romantic?
James: No, we were just at a romantic restruant. I looked at her and wrote it. I didn`t go home and say," How do I live thee, let me count the ways..."
Digest: Still.writing poetry on the spot is pretty romantic.
James: I think I`m very in love with my wife. You notice there hasn`t been any more after that! I was good for one poem.
Digest: How else do you keep the romance alive in your marriage?
James: One thing that I feel is very special about our relationship is that we aren`t event-oriented, but we do have date night on Wednesdays where we can have time alone away from our son.
Digest: Since you work together and live together, do you ever het sick of each other?
Kassie: We tend to forget we are individuals sometimes, but I enjoy my husband`s company. Not that it`s always roses --- it certainly isn`t. But it`s the thorns that make you appreciate te roses. And believe me, Jimmy and I have our thorns!
James: But good or bad, no matter what happens or what`s said and done between us --- we`re going to be together. It`s meant to be that

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