By a Whisker
Episode Synopsis:
Carmen steals two rare white lion cubs for her private game preserve.
Guard 1: Tomorrow's front page ought to be more interesting than this: "White Lion Cubs Found in Africa." Not exactly what you call earth-shaking, now is it? And lo, did you feel something?
Guard 2: Yeah, I'm feeling a little bit queasy. Better take a bit of fresh air.
Guard 1: She's done it! Carmen Sandiego has actually stolen the Crown Jewels and part of the Tower of London!
Player: I'll find you wherever you go, Carmen.
Carmen: You may find me, Player, but you'll always miss me..."by a whisker."
Chief: If the place was still being used for a prison, the Queen of England would give Carmen Sandiego the penthouse suite and throw away the key.
Zack: Oh, great. The C-5 blew our landing again. No Tower of London in sight.
Ivy: I hope you can speak Mongolian, Zack.
Zack: Uh...not a word. But some Mongolians speak Chinese.
Ivy: Good. Say something nice--fast.
Zack: {Excuse me! Have you seen the Tower of London?}
Henchman: Hi-ya!
Ivy: What did you say?
Zack: I'm not exactly sure! I either asked for directions or said their sisters wash ugly camels!
Zack: Whoa!
Ivy: Hit it! Whoa, what in the world was that?
Sir Nigel Fenwick: So sorry. I fired a flare gun and frightened off your pursuers. Inspector Sir Nigel Fenwick, Scotland Yard.
Zack: Cool, the famous London police! I'm Zack. This is Ivy. We're from the Acme Detective Agency.
Sir Nigel Fenwick: It'll be very exciting working with me. You'll learn ever so much. It appears only two diamond necklaces are missing from the costume display.
Zack: Why would Carmen go through this elaborate heist for two necklaces and leave the Crown Jewels behind?
Sir Nigel Fenwick: A simple Carmen clue which I discovered when I first arrived gives us the answer. There you have it. Now, we'll take my jet to Vancouver, Canada, where you can watch me catch Carmen red-handed.
Ivy: Wait a minute. How could you deduce that it was Vancouver, Canada, that quickly?
Sir Nigel Fenwick: Elementary, my dear Ivy. Time was the essential clue.
Zack: Uh, Ivy, he's right. It's six o'clock PM here in Mongolia, but Carmen's clock is set at three AM. Player, where in the world is it three o'clock right now?
Zack: Come on, Ivy! This Sir Nigel guy is good!
Ivy: Wait a minute, Zack! You know the first rule of good detective work: "Check and double-check all your clues before making a deduction."
Zack: Look!
Ivy: Now, why would Carmen use an eagle instead of a cuckoo in a cuckoo clock? And--
Carmen: --My next theft? Maybe it's a hideout in a park.
Ivy: I bet Sir Nigel didn't even hear this part of the clue. And I've already figured it out.
Zack: You have?
Ivy: It's elementary, my dear Zack. An eagle was a famous symbol of the ancient Romans.
Carmen: My next theft? Maybe it's a hideout in a park.
Ivy: "Maybe it's a hideout in a park?" Carmen's doing a bad Italian accent.
Zack: Alright, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. Sir Nigel must've called ahead to warn them.
Ivy: Wait a minute!
Zack: Ack!
Ivy: Something's very wrong here!
Henchman: Tickets from the boss.
Ivy: Nowadays, Mounties only wear their red coats for ceremonies. These guys are fakes, Zack!
Zack: Ivy, Canada exports logs, they don't bring them back to the woods. I've got a bad feeling about this stop.
Henchman: You two have a good ride?
Ivy: Not as good as the one you're about to take!
Henchman 1: After them! They're heading into the woods!
Henchman 2: Don't lose them! Carmen went through a lot of trouble to lure them here!
Ivy: Zack, this is brilliant!
Zack: Thank the beavers. They build these lodges for warmth in the winter and for protection from predators. Like Carmen's henchmen. All the air we could want.
Ivy: And now, if we only liked to eat bark.
Zack: We're sure lucky that beaver dam was in the right place at the right time.
Ivy: Lucky would be having one of those henchmen's tickets. Then we could figure out Carmen's next move.
Zack: Hey, what's this imprint here, sis?
Ivy: Whoa, I must've rolled on something when I fell.
Zack: Got a mirror?
Ivy: Still looks backwards to me.
Zack: That's because the alphabet isn't always as simple as ABC, Ivy. We write with Roman letters, but this is the Cyrillic alphabet, used in Russia and Bulgaria.
Ivy: What's it say?
Zack: It says, "Ticket for the Trans-Siberian Express!"
Ivy: Woohoo! Player, C-5 us there!
Conductor: *gasps*
Zack: {It's okay! It's okay! We're from the Acme Detective Agency.}
Conductor: {Yes, I've heard of you.}
Ivy: Well, at least the C-5 hit the mark this time. Ah!
Zack: Hey, a purebred Russian Blue.
Ivy: What is it with you and cats, Zack?
Conductor: {Here, Misha.}
Zack: Whoa, he feeds his cat caviar, Ivy.
Conductor: {Today's your lucky day, Misha. A case of caviar smashed open in one of the boxcars.}
Zack: Ivy, could it be Carmen's after a boxcar full of caviar?
Ivy: Sure, but how does caviar connect with the totem pole, the black Hawaiian sand and two necklaces?
Zack: It's caviar to us, but to Misha, fish eggs are the ultimate cat food. If Carmen's a cat lover, then she sees kitty collars where we see diamond necklaces. To us, they're totem poles, but to her they're the ultimate kitty scratching posts.
Ivy: Okay, I'll bite. But how does the black beach sand fit into this cat theory?
Zack: Oh, Ivy, if you've gotta ask that, you should never own a cat. And if my hunch is correct, Carmen's henchmen should be in the caviar boxcar right this minute!
Ivy: Tickets, please?
*Carmen's henchmen escape*
Sir Nigel Fenwick: Am I too late?
Ivy: Go ahead, Chief.
Chief: I've got a Scotland Yard rustler aboard you might be interested in. This is Sir Nigel Fenwick of Scotland Yard...and this is Frank M. Poster, a Carmen Sandiego henchman and master of disguise!
Ivy: I knew there was something I didn't like about you!
Sir Nigel Fenwick/Frank M. Poster: Well, I guess the little masquerade is over. So now it's my job to throw you off the tracks, so to speak.
Ivy: You forgot one detail, Mr. Frank M. Poster. We have you, and when this train stops, you'll be arrested by the Russian police.
Frank M. Poster: Oh my. How embarrassing. I could just sink right through the floor.
Zack: Ivy?
Ivy: Yeah Zack?
Zack: We're both smart people. So how come we always wind up doing things that make us look like we have the IQ of beef jerky?
Ivy: I don't know, forget it. Now, come on, think--If Carmen's shopping for a kitty, what kind do you think she'd go after?
Zack: I've got bad news, Ivy. There's Carmen's henchman coming from behind!
Ivy: I've got worse news, Zack. There's a waterfall ahead!
Ivy: What? Let go of the leash, Carmen!
Carmen: No. I've created a splended environment on my own private game preserve, Ivy. You give up.
Ivy: Game's over, Carmen. You lose.
Ivy: Carmen! Give me your hand! You'll go over the falls!
Player: I thought you were finished for sure, Carmen.
Carmen: Cats don't have nine lives the way people say, but I do, Player.
Player: I'll catch you soon enough.
Carmen: You'll have to find me first, and the world is my hiding place. See you next crime.
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