Everything I Need To Know In Life I Learned From Willow


*A stolen Barbie is a good reason to break up (Welcome to the Hellmouth)

*Night is a dark time. Traditionally. (Welcome to the Hellmouth)

*An ideal date does NOT include a vampire, a really dark night and a mausoleum. (Welcome to the Hellmouth)

*Ask to see if anyone minds if you pass out (The Harvest)

*Decrypting the city council's security system can really help you out. (The Harvest)

*Schools are strict about stuff blowing up. (The Harvest)

*Surprises in hot dogs are not good. (Teacher's Pet)

*mean kids are obnoxious. Professionally. (The Pack)

*Signs of a crush - constantly monitoring his health, his moods, his and his blood pressure. (The Pack)

*If you fail math, you flunk out of school, you end up being the guy at the pizza place that sweeps the floor and says, 'Hey, kids, where's the cool parties this weekend?'(The Pack)

*Hyenas aren't well liked. (The Pack)

*Speaking up leads to madness and sweaty plams. (Angel)

*Know when to shut up. (Angel)

*Meeting boys from the internet is a bad idea (I, Robot, You Jane)

*Breaking up with a guy can sometimes get violent. (I, Robot, You Jane)

*Dramatic scenes don't require any talent. (The Puppet Show)

*Spiders are freaky! (Nightmares)

*Very bad. To sing. (Nightmares)

*Once you've fought one witch, you can fight 'em all. (Invisible Girl)

*"Date me" is silly. (Prophecy Girl)

*It's the computer age. Nerds are in. (Porphecy Girl)

*When playing Rock, Paper, Sissors, it's a bad idea to always be sissors. You're hand will cramp up. (When She Was Bad)

*The Three Musketeers were cool. (When She Was Bad)

*Love makes you do the wacky (Some Assembly Required)

*A tomato is a fruit. (Some Assembly Required)

*Little powdered donuts are great for a field trip to the cemetry. (Some Assembly Required)

*Running is wrong, but it's okay to hide. (School Hard)

*Smoking is addictive. (Inca Mummy Girl)

*There are lots of dress up alternitives at a celebration of cultures. (Inca Mummy Girl)

*Coffee is the non-relationship drink of choice (Reptile Boy)

*Lying to the librarian = world askew(Reptile Boy)

*Askew means cockeyed (Reptile Boy)

*Outbrusts don't make you feel better. (Reptile Boy)

*Wild things go on at frat parties. (Reptile Boy)

*Boys are fragile (Halloween)

*The whole point of Halloween in free candy (Halloween)

*Wild = spaz (Halloween)

*Coffee can make you jumpy. (Lie To Me)

*Imagining two teachers together is icky. (The Dark Age)

*Sometimes you don't have to check for a pluse to ralize that someone is dead. (The Dark Age)

*A dead guy turning into a puddle is something you don't see everyday. (The Dark Age)

*If your friends are in trouble, there is no time for fighting. You have to put your heads together and get them out of it. (The Dark Age)

*You're not going to be young forever. (What's My Line Part 1)

*Notice changes in a guys hair colour. (What's My Line Part 2)

*A box of animal crackers can make for a really good conversation. (What's My Line Part 2)

*If your friend starts to call you "cute bunny", check his diet for drugs (Ted)

*Tardy people actually show up. (Bad Eggs)

*Always sit by your phone incase your friend calls at 2:45 in the morning (Bad Eggs)

*Pregnacey is a major concequence of sexual activity. (Bad Eggs)

*Complement your boyfriend's band often (Surprise)

*The talking thing can turn into the ackward silence thing. (Surprise)

*If you can't think of a nasty word when you need to tell people off, let them know you're upset and can't think of the word right now, but that's what they are(Innocence)

*If you don't have cable, make your own fun! (Innocence)

*Forget that crush on your best friend...and go for the older guy! (Phases)

*The innocent schoolgirl act DOES work!(Phases)

*Warewolves are quite the party animal. (Phases)

*If can feel good to help. (Phases)

*The written version can sound pretty good. (Phases)

*Sometimes what a girl makes has to be the first move. (Phases)

*Count to 10 when you're angry (Phases)

*The "no biting" rule is a good rule for a relationship. (Phases)

*If you love someone, try to axe murder them (Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered)

*Teachers are to be respected, even if they're only filling in until the real teacher shows up, because otherwise chaos could ensue. (Passion)

*Men can be jerks sometimes. Dead or alive. (Passion)

*Finished homework is a much better "get well" gift than chocolates. (Killed By Death)

*Dead guys can't finish their coffee. (Killed By Death)

*The ability to halucinate on cue can come in handy. (Killed By Death)

*When teaching, do "the joke thing". (I Only Have Eyes For You)

*Take all interrogations seriously. (Go Fish)

*Peeing in the pool is gross. (Go Fish)

*The trick to interrogation is not to leave any marks. (Go Fish)

*If you threaten to sweat blood, make sure it's only metaphor blood. (Becoming Part 1)

*Big no to danger. (Becoming Part 1)

*If you know your name, who's president, and how many fingers, there is a good chance your brain didn't get mushed. (Becoming Part 2)

*Use your resolve face often. (Becoming Part 2)

*Failing a grade isn't a turn on (Anne) Submitted by Isis

*Don't try spells you're not ready for or you can make neighbours mad. (Deadman's Party)

*Witchcraft comes in handy if you've got a zit. (Deadman's Party)

*Boys like it when you do things with your mouth (not that bad thing with your mouth!) (Faith, Hope & Trick)

*If you're going to make fun of someone, make sure they aren't right behind you first. (Faith, Hope & Trick)

*Never try a 'fire out of ice' spell while on your bedspread. (Faith, Hope & Trick)

*Sunnydale is never boring. (Faith, Hope & Trick)

*It can take a while to get used to a half monty, let alone a full one. (All Men Are Beasts)

*A private limo is cuddlesome. (Homecoming)

*Flukes are caused by clothes. (Homecoming)

*By over compensating, you can spin a whole group's dynamics out of orbit. (Homecoming)

*Be proud of your boyfriend's acomplishments and failures. (Band Candy)

*Bands are like an army, except with music instead of bullets and usually no one dies. (Band Candy)

*Secrets are normal and good. Why else would we keep them? (Revalations)

*Keeping secrets is a lot of work. (Revalations)

*Bowling is easier if you use the inflatible things in the gutters. (Lover's Walk)

*Shoe rental can be a turn on (Lover's Walk)

*Never disagree with a drunk and heartbroken vamp. (Lover's Walk)


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