The TCWA Sunday Night SLAM!!!!!

Show transcript from October 19, 1998:

(Show intro)

You want to run with THE BIG DOGS???? Well stop PISSING ON MY LEG LIKE A PUPPY!

Promo shows ME DDTing Flint, MECHANIC splashing several jabronies at once, THE MASKED MARVEL and CLUTCH doing the OUTCAST sign, SALVO hitting a CAMERA MAN with a STUNNER, The ROADPIGS executing a devastating DOOMSDAY DEVICE on some poor sap, RAPTOR la koo koo RACHA dancing in the middle of the ring with his robe on, and BUZZER executing the DIAMOND CUTTER on Zandar followed by Buzzer saying ....


(Fireworks EXPLODE!)

Scott Hanson: WELCOME EVERYONE! We are here LIVE at the Titan Arena! I am your host Scott Hanson along side Jimmy Valentine getting ready for the DEBUT of the TCWA Sunday Night SLAM!!!!

Jimmy Valentine: I don't know what romance novel you stepped out of PRETTY BOY Hanson but all I've got to say to you is you better stay in line with the REAL host of this show THE MASTERMIND JIMMY VALENTINE... Because if you don't, I'll open a can of WHOOP @$$ on ya!

Scott Hanson: Speaking of WHOOP @$$... (STONE COLD MUSIC EXPLODES) It looks like SALVO is making his way to the ring!

Jimmy Valentine: Waa? What is THIS????

STONE COLD STEVE SALVO: Cut that d*mn music OFF!

(Music stops)

SALVO: Last night I got SCREWED so d*mn bad you'd think I was STEVE AUSTIN or somebody! I don't know what kind of B.S. the TCWA is trying to pull but I shouldn't have been DQ'ed out of the World Title tournament! The REAL Stone Cold wants retribution and I want it RIGHT NOW -HERE- TONIGHT!!

( I appear from behind the entrance way's curtain with a microphone in my hand)

DDT: SALVO I couldn't have said it better -MYSELF-!

(Salvo is looking around at the crowd as if to say "What is this JACK@$$ doing here?")

DDT: You're D*MN right you were SCREWED out of becoming the TCWA World Heavyweight Champion... You have EVERY right to be UPSET... You have every right to want REVENGE....

SALVO: Stop talking like you've got TOILET PAPER in your mouth son and get to the d*mn point!

(The crowd begins laughing hysterically)

DDT: My POINT is, before I was so rudely interrupted...

(Crowd starts booing)

DDT: You DESERVE an opportunity at the TCWA World Heavyweight Championship TONIGHT!

(Crowd starts chanting @$$HOLE, @$$HOLE at ME!!???!!!)

SALVO: I didn't quite hear you Tyrrell... You've got 18,000 people chanting ASSHOLE, ASSHOLE at ya!

(Crowd is "rolling on the floor")

DDT: I just said I am granting you a WORLD TITLE SHOT TONIGHT!

SALVO: Maybe you're not such an @$$hole after all...

(Salvo turns to the crowd...)

SALVO: What do y'all think???........

(People are still chanting @$$HOLE!)

SALVO: Fair enough than Tyrrell... You are ALWAYS going to be an @$$HOLE and I'm going to be the next TCWA World Heavyweight Champion!...

(STONE COLD music comes back on- Salvo goes up onto the second rope and raises his arms saying the title is coming to STONE COLD tonight!)

DDT: Oh SALVO.. by the way.. one more thing before I leave ... YOU will not be the ONLY one receiving a World Title shot tonight since you weren't the ONLY one who got "SCREWED" out of becoming champion....

(Mr. Tyrrell  then exits through the backstage curtain.. Salvo is seen in the ring with a smirk on his face as the TCWA Sunday Night SLAM goes to a commercial break)

Scott Hanson: We are back with the TCWA Sunday Night SLAM! Our ring announcer is standing by for our opening contest....

Vince Butler: Ladies and gentlemen this is our opening contest for the DEBUT of the TCWA Sunday Night SLAM!!!!!.....

(VADER music starts up)

Vince Butler: From BOULDER COLORADO weighing 467 lbs... THE MAN THEY CALL........... THE MANIAC..... MECHANIC!!!!!

Jimmy Valentine: Yeah WHAT TIME IS IT!??! WHAT TIME IS IT!??!

Scott Hanson: It's VADER time???

Jimmy Valentine: NO it's -TOOL TIME- you IDIOT!

Scott Hanson: The former 3 time TCWA World Heavyweight Champion MECHANIC is making his way towards the ring as Vince Butler is getting ready to announce Mechanic's opponent...

Vince Butler: AND his opponent.....

(Ricky THE DRAGON Steamboat music begins playing!)

Vince Butler: From Tokyo Japan weighing 240 lbs. -RICKY "THE DRAGON" INOKI- better known as QUICK KICK!

Scott Hanson: This LIVE match has been a long time coming! Check out Quick Kick! He looks to be in the best shape of his LIFE!

Jimmy Valentine: Quick Kick looks in great shape now but lets see how little Ricky looks after he has had his HEAD separated off his SHOULDERS by my man- the MASTADON!

Scott Hanson: This is going to be one HECK of a match! - A real GUT check!

Jimmy Valentine: Checking out MECHANIC'S gut, it looks like he's lost alot of weight!

Bell: Ding! Ding!

Scott Hanson: The bell sounds and we are OFFICIALLY underway.....

MECHANIC: Tonight -PUPPY- I DOMINATE YOU and make a statement to the WORLD at your expense CHUMP!

Quick Kick: Take your best shot!

Scott Hanson: Ohh!!! Mechanic just clubbed Quick Kick in the back of the head! Oh and AGAIN!

Jimmy Valentine: Yeah! Set him up!

Scott Hanson: Mechanic sends Quick Kick off the ropes and BOOM... NO Quick Kick ducked the clothesline attempt and comes off the other side with a flying double knife edge chop to the chest!

MECHANIC: (Still on his feet) NO PAIN!.... NO FEAR!

Jimmy Valentine: You're just making him mad Quick RICK...

Scott Hanson: Quick Kick comes off the ropes again and.... OOH! Mechanic caught Quick Kick in MID AIR as Inoki was going for the flying body press!

MECHANIC: (Going thumbs down while holding Quick Kick with one arm) This is for YOU GRUDGE...


Scott Hanson: Mechanic with a POWERSLAM! And a cover... 1.... NO! Mechanic didn't want to make a cover????

Jimmy Valentine: Mechanic is out to prove a point here!

Scott Hanson: Mechanic with a hammering blow to Quick Kick's head and now what's this? Ohhhh... A DDT? Uncommon for the big man!

Jimmy Valentine: You can tell the influence the owner of this company has on Mechanic....

Scott Hanson: Mechanic now... How about THAT!... A THRUST kick! When is the last time Mechanic had the DEXTERITY to do THAT!??!

Jimmy Valentine: Like I mentioned earlier Mechanic has dropped some weight... They announced him at his ROOKIE weight of 467!

Scott Hanson: Mechanic now up on the second rope! WHAA? Quick Kick moved out of the way and Mechanic just crashed FACE FIRST into the mat!

Jimmy Valentine: Quick Kick side stepped 'em and now Quick Kick is getting FIRED up!

Scott Hanson: Quick Kick with a DROPKICK! Mechanic is still on his feet! Quick Kick with ANOTHER DROPKICK! The big man still won't go down! Quick Kick is going up to the TOP ROPE!....

Jimmy Valentine: OHHH!

Scott Hanson: Even a DROPKICK OFF THE TOP ROPE didn't take Mechanic down!

Jimmy Valentine: Quick Kick looks like he's getting frustrated...

Scott Hanson: Quick Kick is going for a BODYSLAM!.... Forget about it!

Jimmy Valentine: Mechanic got 'em in the kidneys with a forearm and look... POWERBOMB!! POWERBOMB!!!!!

Scott Hanson: OHH! Quick Kick just got FOLDED UP like an ACCORDIAN!... Cover... 1, 2,.... NO!!! Mechanic picked Quick Kick up at 2 and 1/2???

MECHANIC: This one is for you VADER!!!!

Scott Hanson: Mechanic sets Quick Kick off the ropes!!! OHH OOHH! Here it comes! Watch this IMPACT!....

Jimmy Valentine: THE PUPPYSIZER!!!!!!!!!!

Scott Hanson: Waa?? Somehow Quick Kick turned it into a LEG SCISSORS DDT!!!! A LEG SCISSORS DDT!!!

Jimmy Valentine: WHAT?????

Scott Hanson: Mechanic is DOWN! Quick Kick is slapping on the STF!

Jimmy Valentine: You've got to be kidding me?????

Bell: DING!!!! DING!!!! DING!!!!


Jimmy Valentine: I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!!!!!

Ring Announcer: (Dragon music comes on over the loud speakers) The WINNER of the match..... QUICK KICK!!!!!

Jimmy Valentine: How can this be happening? I've got to talk to Mechanic... Something's just not right....

Scott Hanson: The crowd is in TOTAL DISBELIEF as QUICK KICK raises his hand in victory over MECHANIC!!!

(Commercial break)

Scott Hanson: What a STUNNING upset victory for Quick Kick over MECHANIC!

Jimmy Valentine: I'm telling you! Something is just not right with Mechanic... Last night he lost to BUZZER when he had things well in hand and TONIGHT... Well I just don't know what to say....

Bell: Ding! Ding!

Scott Hanson: It's time now for our next matchup....

Vince Butler: This contest is a special challenge 6 MAN TAG TEAM CONTEST scheduled for 1 Fall with a special 20 minute time limit.... Introducing first with their new manager KREMLIN... (Trooper music begins playing) Here is the team of IVAN and BORIS MALENKOVICH and THE ABOLISHER.... THE COMMUNIST REGIME!!!!

Scott Hanson: Wow! Look at the SIZE of these 3 men ESPECIALLY the 7'4 well over 450 pound ABOLISHER!......

Vince Butler: And their OPPONENTS.... (LOD music ERRUPTS!) First from CHICAGO IL ROADPIG RUSH and ROADPIG CANNIBAL .... THE LEGION OF DESTRUCTION!!!!!... THE ROADPIGS!!!!!... And their tag team partner (A MOTORCYCLE revs up!) From Sturgis South DAKOTA!... HOSS HARLEY!!!!

(Hoss Harley rides on a HARLEY DAVIDSON to the ring!)

Jimmy Valentine: >Cough< >Gag< Somebody tell that BUFFOON to get a better muffler! That smoke is killing me!

Scott Hanson: What are you talking about! That is an AMERICAN MADE Harley! OOOH YEAH!!!

KREMLIN: Hey you STUPID Americans!

Scott Hanson: What's this now?

KREMLIN: Hey I'm talking to you PIG BOYS! I have something SPECIAL for you veak SWINES later tonight!

Bell: Ding! Ding! Ding!

(Commercial break)

Scott Hanson: We're back with the TCWA Sunday Night SLAM! The match between The RoadPigs and Hoss Harley versus the Communist Regime is already in progress... Jim, I wonder what Kremlin has up his sleeve?

Jimmy Valentine: You've got me but if I know Kremlin, which I do, the ROAPIGS, and Hoss are in for something NASTY!

Scott Hanson: What do you mean by THAT? OH! Ivan Malenkovich just tried to take RoadPig Rush's HEAD off with that RUSSIAN SICKLE!

Jimmy Valentine: Most guys have clotheslines but these Russians have PERFECTED the art of the LARIAT, as they like to call it -THE RUSSIAN SICKLE-!

Scott Hanson: RoadPig Rush needs to make the tag but now a BEAR HUG by the big 300 plus pound Russian stops that from happening! Rush is now DRIVEN into the Communist Regime's corner!

Jimmy Valentine: They have cut the ring off... Excellent tag team strategy... And watch this...

Scott Hanson: KREMLIN is distracting the referee meanwhile Rush is getting PUMMELED and DEMOLISHED THREE on ONE in the corner! Come on ref TURN AROUND!

Jimmy Valentine: This is beautiful! I couldn't have directed a better rule breaking tactic myself!

Scott Hanson: You like to see people cheat don't you!

Jimmy Valentine: Hey if you're not cheating; you're not tryin hard enough like my mentor used to say!

Scott Hanson: We wish DON GRAY the best where ever he is...

Jimmy Valentine: WHAT!??!

Scott Hanson: Somehow Rush leaps across the ring and makes the tag to CANNIBAL!

Jimmy Valentine: Explain yourself Hanson!


Jimmy Valentine: Ha! Ha! The ABOLISHER is not effected!

Scott Hanson: The Abolisher has RoadPig Cannibal by the THROAT!

Jimmy Valentine: CHOKESLAM!!! CHOKESLAM!!!

Scott Hanson: NO! HOSS HARLEY with a FLYING CLOTHLINE OFF THE TOP ROPE just sent the ABOLISHER out of the ring!

Jimmy Valentine: The Abolisher- all 7'4 of 'em- landed ON HIS FEET after going over the top rope!

Scott Hanson: KREMLIN is on the apron! RoadPig Rush nails HIM with a FLYING SHOULDER TACKLE! The crowd is on their feet! Wait a minute who the HECK is that coming down to the ring!!!????

Jimmy Valentine: IT'S..........

(At the same time): IT'S NASTY NED BORGA!!!!!

Scott Hanson: What is HE doing here? Borga has just grabbed one of the RoadPig's CEMENT blocks!

Jimmy Valentine: OHHHHH!

Scott Hanson: BORGA has just come into the ring and smashed RoadPig Cannibal over the head with the cement block! RoadPig Rush turns around and BOOM..he gets hit with the cement block as well! Hoss Harley is coming into the ring and BOOM... NASTY NED BORGA just LAYED OUT HOSS HARLEY with the CEMENT BLOCK!!!! This is HORRIBLE!

Jimmy Valentine: NASTY NED BORGA has just SINGLE HANDEDLY laid the ROAPIGS and Hoss Harley OUT!

Scott Hanson: I have never seen anything like THIS! This is HORRIFYING!

(As Kremlin, Boris, Ivan, The ABOLISHER, and NASTY NED BORGA stand over their victims with their fists raised in TRIUMPH!)

Scott Hanson: Someone get some help for Hoss Harley and the RoadPigs for crying out loud!.... Fans we'll be right back.....

(Brief time out)

Scott Hanson: We're BACK from our commercial break. The CARNAGE we just witnessed moments ago has been removed from the ring and....

(2001 MUSIC starts playing!)

Scott Hanson: Oh boy....

Jimmy Valentine: You know what that means!

Scott Hanson: That could mean only TWO things... One, RIC FLAIR is now working for the TCWA.... Or TWO....

Jimmy Valentine: WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

(As GUESS WHO shows up)

Scott Hanson: SLIC RIC RAPTOR is on his way down that aisle...

SLIC RIC RAPTOR: (Coming to the ring in dress clothes and sunglasses) WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Last night in front of the whole world SLIC RIC RAPTOR got SCREWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWED!!

DDT: (Appearing from behind the entrance curtain with a microphone in my hand) RAPTOR I couldn't have said THAT better -MYSELF-!

RAPTOR: (Taking off his shades and revealing a BLACK EYE from being PUPPYSIZED with a lead pipe last night) You see this Tyrrell... I should give YOU one of these right now PUNK!

DDT: Raptor I know you're upset but you are displacing your anger... I more than ANYONE wanted to see YOU become the TCWA World Heavyweight Champion for the 8th time last night!

(Crowd starts chanting FAGIT, FAGIT at ME!!??!)

RAPTOR: Don't worry Dave! Your MOTHER more than anyone was SCREAMING "GO CHAMP GO" all night long when I took her for a ride on SPACE MOUNTAIN!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!

(Strutting in the ring like CRAZY!!!)


(Crowd going OHH!)

RAPTOR: Oh don't worry Dave... SHE was doing plenty of THAT too!

(Crowd going WOOOOOOOO!!!!)

DDT: (Somehow composing myself) Alright you just want to trade insults all night... Then I won't tell you WHY I'm REALLY standing out here right now...

RAPTOR: You're here to tell me your male pattern baldness is CURIABLE????

DDT: (STILL somehow composing myself) What I've been trying to tell you, you F'N JACK@$$!....

(Crowd starts to boo)

DDT: I believe YOU more than ANYBODY deserves a FLAIR err excuse me a FAIR opportunity at the TCWA World Heavyweight Championship!

RAPTOR: I'm listening...


RAPTOR: (Laa Koo Koo Racha dancing in the ring) TYRRELL... The PARTIE'S ON! WOOOOOOOO!!!!


Scott Hanson: FLINT is making his way to the ring!

DDT: What the H*LL is this??? Security DON'T let HIM out here!!! I FIRED that BASTARD for good last night!

FLINT: (Grabbing the microphone from a CONFUSED looking Raptor- Security is just letting Flint stand in the ring?) TYRRELL, SHUT YOUR D*MN HOLE!

(Crowd jumping around in excitement)

FLINT: You know last night you thought you were a real GENIUS the way you eliminated me from the World Title tournament....

DDT: Well I...


(Some fan throws a cup of beer at Flint- Good shot whoever that was!)

FLINT: Tyrrell I've got an offer for YOU, an OFFER you can't REFUSE....

DDT: (I am looking around with an intrigued look on my face) Go on... I'm listening...

FLINT: If you give ME a World Title shot tonight I will personally END my feud with you FOREVER!

DDT: FOREVER? That sounds tempting.... But what happens if I DON'T grant you a title shot tonight???

FLINT: Well then TYRRELL I'll make sure your life is a living HELL from NOW until ETERNITY!

(Hart Foundation music pops back on! The crowd is dancing in the aisle as the show goes to a commercial break....)

Scott Hanson: It looks like the stage is set for the Main Event...

Jimmy Valentine: Now hold on just a minute Hanson... Mr. Tyrrell NEVER agreed to give FLINT a World Title shot tonight... We DO however have two other men that HAVE been given the go ahead.... RAPTOR.... And......


Scott Hanson: Speak of the DEVIL! HERE HE COMES!!!! HERE HE COMES!!!! I don't care who else in this industry says this but I'm going to say it anyway "BUSINESS IS ABOUT TO PICK UP"!!!!!

Jimmy Valentine: STONE COLD STEVE SALVO is making his way down the aisle and listen to these fans! They think this guy walks on water!

Scott Hanson: I don't know about that but... (2001 music) According to Mr. Tyrrell himself this man however is the 2nd COMING!!!!!

(Slic Ric Raptor comes out in a $1,000,000 robe and a huge bandage to cover his umm, "shiner")

(After a long intro)

Scott Hanson: And now here comes....

(Hart Foundation music starts)

DDT: (Over the loud speakers) CUT THAT RIDICULOUS MUSIC OFF!!!!!

(DDP MUSIC cranks up INSTEAD!)

Scott Hanson: What's going on HERE? It looks like the TCWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION is coming to the ring right NOW and NOT FLINT--- It's BUZZER!??! Yes!!! Yes!!! It's BUZZER making his way to the ring!

BUZZER: (To the crowd) BANG!!!!!

DDT: (Over the loud speakers again) ALRIGHT- RING THE F'N BELL AND START THE D*MN MATCH!

Scott Hanson: Buzzer is not even in the ring yet and -BOOM- BOTH Salvo and Raptor are attacking Buzzer! As I understand this was supposed to be a FATAL FOURWAY but it looks like it's going to be a TEXAS TORNADO TRIANGLE MATCH instead! The rules are simple... THERE ARE NONE! The man that is able to pin one or both of the other two opponents becomes the UNDISPUTED Champion!

Jimmy Valentine: OHH! Salvo just hit RAPTOR with the time keepers bell!

Scott Hanson: Raptor has been PUPPYSIZED INSIDE OUT two nights in a row by a foreign object! Meanwhile Buzzer has a television cable cord and is CHOKING Salvo with it from behind! MAN! This is getting BRUTAL ALREADY!

Jimmy Valentine: OHH! Salvo with a JAWBREAKER to break the hold!

Scott Hanson: Raptor is still laying flat on his back! He may need medical attention!

Jimmy Valentine: Look out HERE!

Scott Hanson: Salvo with an irish whip on Buzzer into the steel barricade! NO! It's Salvo who hits the barricade and tumbles OVER the railing into the first ROW! RAPTOR is somehow getting back up!

Scott Hanson: He has the heart of a REAL WORLD'S CHAMPION.... Say what you will about him but... Raptor has a CHAIR and BAMMMM! Buzzer just got his BELL RUNG when SKULL just met STEEL there!

Jimmy Valentine: Salvo has been handed a BEER from a fan!

Scott Hanson: Salvo is getting recharged! Stone Cold is now climbing back over the steel barricade and BOOM Raptor MEASURED Salvo's bald head for that one! Stone Cold is busted wide open!

(A fan throws trash at Raptor!)

Jimmy Valentine: Buzzer is getting a second wind!

Scott Hanson: Buzzer with a running knee lift and...


Scott Hanson: Raptor's head just met the edge of the STEEL STEPS! That's gonna take some serious stitches to patch up!

Jimmy Valentine: Hold on... We've got TROUBLE!

Scott Hanson: TROUBLE??? What??? OH NO! NOT NOW! ZARTAN and ZANDAR are making their way through the crowd!

Jimmy Valentine: Buzzer has grabbed the chair from Raptor's limp body!

Scott Hanson: Buzzer has the chair and is saying COME ON DOWN to ZARTAN and ZANDAR!!!!


Scott Hanson: Look WHO'S coming from the other side of the arena!!!!...

Jimmy Valentine: They're not even scheduled to be HERE!


Jimmy Valentine: You talk about "BUSINESS PICKING UP"??? Our ratings just shot through the FRIGGIN ROOF!

Scott Hanson: ZARTAN and ZANDAR are being CHASED out of the arena now!

Scott Hanson: SALVO has gotten back to his feet... He just kicked BUZZER from behind!

Jimmy Valentine: Look OUT!


Jimmy Valentine: NO! BUZZER saw it coming!!!


Scott Hanson: Salvo just got hit with a DIAMOND CUTTER on the STEEL CHAIR!!!!!

Jimmy Valentine: NOBODY'S getting up from THAT! I don't care WHO you are!

Scott Hanson: Raptor has a SWITCH BLADE!

Jimmy Valentine: Where did he get THAT??!!

Scott Hanson: There's no telling judging by this blood thirsty crowd! A fan could have handed it to him!

Jimmy Valentine: This is ARIZONA... You can carry concealed weapons in this state!

Scott Hanson: Raptor is slashing at Buzzer and...


Jimmy Valentine: What's going on?

Scott Hanson: Raptor is distracted and Buzzer kicks the knife away from him!

RAPTOR: (On his hands and knees BEGGING) NO! NO! NO!


Scott Hanson: Buzzer just got hit with a LOW BLOW by RAPTOR!

Jimmy Valentine: He's the DIRTIEST PLAYER IN THE GAME!

Scott Hanson: How in the... SALVO is getting back up!!!!

Jimmy Valentine: Salvo looks PISSED!

Scott Hanson: Look who's coming to the ringside area now-

Jimmy Valentine: WHO the H*LL?????

Scott Hanson: It's REPEATER!!!!!

Jimmy Valentine: Why is REPEATER out here?????

Scott Hanson: REPEATER is putting the IRON CLAW on RAPTOR!

Jimmy Valentine: I don't understand? What the heck is going on????

Scott Hanson: Salvo and Buzzer are battling it out in the concession stands now!

Jimmy Valentine: Meanwhile Raptor is still HELPLESS in the IRON CLAW!


Scott Hanson: Wait a minute! I have just received word THE MASKED MARVEL and CLUTCH have finally caught up with ZARTAN and ZANDAR out in the PARKING LOT! We have a camera out there! Let's go to that footage....

(THE ENTIRE ARENA is suddenly in complete DARKNESS!)

Jimmy Valentine: Waa? What happened to the lights???? Are we still on????

Scott Hanson: We seem to be having technical difficulties and.....

A Deep Voice From Over The Loud Speaker: TYRRELL.... TYRRELL.....

Jimmy Valentine: WHO the.....



Scott Hanson: OH MY GOD! That man has to be at least 7'5 and well over 500 lbs!!!!!

?????: TYRRELL your day of reckoning will come VERY SOON! The LAST BELL TOLL of your career will soon be sounded! For your FINAL CHAPTER will be written before the 12th hour of HALLOWEEN NIGHT!!!!!..............

Scott Hanson: (As the lights come back on) I don't know what to make of THIS!....

Jimmy Valentine: What in the world???? Raptor, Salvo, and Buzzer are all KNOCKED out in the middle of the ring??

Scott Hanson: What a BIZARRE sequence of events! I've just received word from our producer that we are almost out of time! We'll have to show the CONCLUSION to this program NEXT WEEK! NO! Not like THIS! What in the...... SOMEBODY in the crowd behind us has just grabbed JIMMY VALENTINE!


Scott Hanson: NO!!! Not ME too!!!! I'm just a COMMENTATOR! DON'T.......

-(To be continued)-

BOO HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!!!!!!!