Cordelia smiled at everyone who walked by, though on the inside, she was terrified. What if they didn't like her? She looked at her skirt and adjusted her hair. It was her first day of junior high and she had to make a good impression. She glanced over at Alexander "Xander" Harris and his little gal-pal and fellow geek, Willow Rosenberg.
What losers, she thought. She sniffed and turned back to the more
important people in front of her. Harmony knew a lot about make-up,
Aura was good at hair care, but none were as good as her. All of
them surrounded her. She was practically the center of everything.
She loved it! She hated it....
//I wore them obliviously
Though they would choke the life from me//
Cordelia smiled as she watched Xander get her a drink. Who would have believed she'd given everything she had known since junior high to hang with Buffy and her friends. Specifically Xander Harris. And Willow Rosenberg. Once the bane of her existence, now the lifelong friends they were sure to become with time.
She had worked so hard to get the status she held at Sunnydale High.
And it was all taken with the knowledge that there was a great evil that
lived with them every day of the year. From the beginning of their
lives, they had been oblivious. They had always concentrated on the
little, unimportant details the most...
//I got here by myself but
I know that I will never leave the same way
I got here by myself but
How many more will I have had led astray//
"Wow, Willow, I see you've been to the thriftshops again," Cordelia remarked as she walked by the young redhead and Xander. She continued walking, though she knew by now Xander's face would be turning red from anger. As she rounded a corner, she saw Willow pulling on his arm, trying to keep him from going after her.
She smiled and laughed with her friends.
//I work the floor in search of someone
Who would give me half a chance
I know if I look hard enough
I'll always find someone who'll dance//
As Xander approached the table, she gazed at him. He wasn't the same person she had known all those years ago. None of them were; they had all changed. They had all become older in just a year.
Finding herself liking Xander was a big surprise. Maybe she always had liked him, even if he was still a bit of a loser. Not that she minded it that much.... Alright, so I do mind, she chastised herself. At least I can be honest with myself. I like Xander, even though he's a complete geek and I'm still embarrassed to hang around him with my other friends.
There, she thought, I said it. I -so- said it. She sighed and thanked Xander for the drink. Neither of them spoke, just watched the people dance. They watched Willow dance to a slow tune with Oz.
Willow's done well for herself, she thought. Smiling in approval, she glanced to Xander. There was an odd expression on his face. One she couldn't exactly place. Something she had never really seen on his face before. Not in all the years she'd known him. Alright, not in all the years she'd teased him.
Her conscience was beginning to get to her. She had used
them as laughing stock to get people to like her, to make herself superior
to others. But now...now she was superior in a way. Buffy and the
others were teaching her what real friends were like. They would
be there no matter what, while the people she thought were her friends,
would abandon her in moments if she made one slip on the social ladder.
//I got here by myself but
I know that I will never leave the same way
I got here by myself but
How many more will I have had led astray//
Cordelia held court once again at the Bronze. Strolling through the entrance she immediately spotted the one she wanted. He was tall, dark, and handsome - everything a teenage girl could want. Slowly, she walked to him. Definitely eye candy. She flashed him a smile and walked over, but stopped when she saw Ms."I'm-a-geek" Willow rush up to him. She whispered something into his ear and the two walked away, disappearing into the crowd.
Her friends gawked at the loss of their leader's prey. She'd never had that happen to her before. Cordelia turned to her friends, still seemingly at a loss for words. Fear began to rise as her group of friends began to walk away from her. The same fear gripped her as she followed quickly after them.
"He was a loser any ways. Not worth my time," she tried to state confidently. "He actually went with Willow Rosenberg! He's -so- not worth it if he likes geeks."
The others nodded and began to circle her again. They had seemed
unsure of what to do for a bit there. And Cordelia knew she wouldn't
be able to live without these people. She needed them to be around.
She loved it. She hated it...it was killing her to live.
//It's not long before I notice
There are no doors to be seen
I can see I'm going nowhere
Somewhere that I've already been//
She jumped in her seat as she felt Xander's arm come around her shoulder. He gave her a lopsided grin and pulled her close. She sighed happily and leaned into him. The road to this particular place in her life was a rough one, but she had never been happier. She had made it this far on her own, and though the future would never be the same, she knew she would just take it all in stride.
Smiling, she kissed Xander and watched her real friends. She would
make it through life on her own...with a little help every now and then.
Well, I hope this wasn't too choppy of a story, but Cordy just started talking and wouldn't let me get to bed till I had written it down for her. Please let me know what you think! Good, bad, indifferent, doesn't matter, I'll take them all! Well...except flames, but that's not really a comment :)