Here are lines from Ned and Alexis:

not in any order:

Alexis- "Alexis Davis."

Helena- "Hello, hello hello. How nice to hear your voice."

Alexis- "I hadn't planned on running any more errands for you. I got the distinct impression we were done with that."

Helena- "I'm sure it wasn't anything I said."

Ned- "It'll be great to see you again too. These phone call leave something to be desired."

Alexis- "Well, I'm bringing that home as well."

Alexis- "Will you please remember to act surprised when he [AJ] starts to brag about it?"

Ned- "Hurry back, or you'll miss my brilliant performance."

Alexis- "I will."

Alexis- "I just need a day of R&R in Hawaii. I want to look my best...How are you?"

Ned- "I'm fine. Port Charles, however, is falling apart."

Alexis- "That's all right. I've been in Jakarta, remember?"

VO Alexis- "Please leave a message for Alexis Davis at the tone."

VO Ned- "Welcome home, beautiful. I hope you like the flowers. They come with a card, but I kept it so I'd have an excuse to see you."

Alexis (picking up the phone)- "Hello..hi...hi" (the line is dead, and then she sees the flowers) "Hello, Ned."

Helena- "There's one more thing I need you to do. Set Tony Jones free." (Alexis is silent) "I'll take that as a yes."

Alexis: (to Ned) My Uncles tried to freeze the world. Top that.

Edward (to AJ): I need your input. Don't keep anything bottled up.

Ned: Oh, rest assured, Grandfather.When AJ's around, nothing stays bottled up for long.

Ned (upon seeing Jason in his new clothes): Goodbye, James Dean. Hello, Donald Trump.

Jax: Just about sums up the last 40 years of Western Civilization.

Ned: Just welcome Alexis into ELQ with a bottle of champagne and a kiss?

AJ: There's a start.

Ned: Alright, I'll do just that. I'll welcome her in style. Quartermaine style.

Jax (upon entering the Q Mansion): Something smells good.

Ned: Grandfather's in the kitchen. Cooking the books.

Jax: It must be time for an ELQ Board Meeting.

Helena: The war has just begun.

Alexis: This war against Stefan and Katherine. Just how long do you plan to go on fighting it.

Helena: If you really gave a damn, you wouldn't have the stomach to assist me.

Helena (to Alexis): Toughen up. It'll lengthen your life.

Ned: Alexis Davis, I humbly present to you...the world.

Ned- "Welcome to our annual Valentine's Day date. Marked by candy, flowers and the traditional mystery gift."

Alexis- "I didn't realize we had an annual Valentine Date.

Alexis- "What?"

Ned- "I think you're one of the most fascinating women I've ever met, and the fact that you could entertain the notion that you could be anything less than spectacular, I don't understand."

Alexis- "I really like you."

Ned- "Then why are you so far away? Come here."

Ned (referring to Alexis' fantasy)- "And, are we lovers?"

Alexis- "Not yet."

Ned- "What can we possibly be thinking of?"

Alexis- "I was thinking that you were doing too much thinking."

Alexis- "Do you think it was incredibly brilliant or unbelievably stupid that we waited this long?"

Ned- "Incredibly brilliant."

Alexis- "This is working out amazingly well."

Ned- "And it's only the beginning. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you right now. How beautiful you are, how feminine, how strong. You take my breath away."

Alexis(talking to Helena)- "I am an attorney, not a salesperson for garden furnature. Now I can be useful to you Helena, because you are making me, but not if you're making me jump through hoops for your own amusement. Now how the hell am I supposed to hock a stone bench to a woman who hates my guts?!"

The Toast

Ned: To mutual non-disclosure...

Alexis: And future negotiations....

Ned (to Alexis): One should never lie....unless you have to.

Alexis: That was direct.

Ned: And sincere. Two qualities I'm not noted for.

Alexis: Is there any limit to your talents?

Ned: You have all night to find out.

Ned: Well, with the right motivation, I'm unbelievably dexterous.

Ned- "You'll never guess what just popped into my mind."

Alexis- "The witty comeback of the first girl that ever turned you down."

Ned- "A very special evening, a few months ago, when I persuaded a small band to play for an extra hour so I could dance with a beautiful lady."

Alexis- "I'm sorry, are you talking about anyone I know?"

Ned- "Are you saying you don't remember?"

Alexis- "I'm saying I'm not sure. Thinking about that tends to cloud my judgement. Or is that your intention?"

Ned- "Now why would I do that?"

Alexis- "To put me in a 'yes' frame of mind."

Ned- "I'll take that anytime I can get it."

Ned- "Are you being deliberately difficult?"

Alexis- "Yes, but don't let that stop you."

Ned- "OK, here's one. Your office would be three doors down from mine."

Alexis- "Now that's interesting."

Alexis- "Becoming friends with Katherine will not be an easy endevor."

Helena- "You will find a way, or you will disappear from Port Charles as mysteriously as you appeared. It's your choice, Natasha."

Ned (referring to his family): They've lost they're collective minds

Alexis: How can you tell?

Alexis- "Hi"

Tony- "Alexis!"

Alexis- "That's me."

Tony- "What are you doing here?"

Alexis- "I work here....remember?"

Tony- "I was just thinking about tracking you down, and POOF! Here you are."

Alexis- "I tend to do that. It's my absurdly accomadating nature."

Ned- "Bad day?"

Alexis(smiling)- "It's rapidly improving."

(Telling AJ to call Jason to see if Emily's there.)

Ned:And groveling would suit you just fine since you spend most of your time on the ground anyway.

(After finding out that Jason and Emily were at church)

Edward:What if it's some kind of organized crime, religious ritual and they're initiating Emily?

Ned:Right. Between vespers and bingo.

(After Edward's remark about how unlikely a pairing Jason and God were)

Ned:The Lord's not exactly on speed dial in this house either.

Alexis (to Luke) - I'm one of those pesky family members. You didn't know? We're everywhere.

Alexis (to Luke about Helena) You've got to be human to die.

Alexis (to Luke) - Mr. Spencer it was so nice chatting with you, really. Next time you get the urge to visit, do call first

Luke - And miss the opportunity of being slapped around by a beautiful woman?

Alexis (to Luke): I could have you brought up on charges for what you’ve just said.

Alexis (to Luke): Why on earth didn’t I just shoot you when I had the chance?

Alexis (to bartender): If I glue my arteries shut tonight, what will I do New Year's Eve? I'll have a double double martini very, very dry--just pour the gin and visualize vermouth.

Alexis (to Ned): Alexis Davis, attorney at law. Should we file a suit to get your other half back?

Alexis (to Ned): "Why I Hate the Holidays"---by Alexis Davis. Because it's like playing pin the tail on the donkey with bayonets. All fun and laughter, and by the time it's done-- everybody's bleeding.

Ned (to Alexis): Alexis. Well, I know you're not here to sell Girl Scout cookies, so you must be here to see me.

Ned (to Alexis) : Ah, is that a new perfume or does the morning air make you smell like gardenias?

Alexis (to Ned): No, I would like you to stop playing verbal dodge ball with me and hear some shred of the truth.

Alexis (to Ned): This is interesting. I come here to ask you about a murder conspiracy and then you ask me - well actually you're telling me - that we're going to have dinner?

Alexis (to Ned): You really need to update your files, Ned. Dragging a woman off by the hair to dinner is a little passé.

Alexis: If I were to agree to have dinner with you, would this be business or a date?

Ned: A date.

Alexis: (looking uncomfortable) What does that mean?

Ned: I open the doors, I pull out the chairs. Occasionally, I reach over and touch you meaningfully on the arm. And at the end of the evening, I kiss you chastely on the cheek and then return home, frustrated, but eagerly anticipating the next time.

Alexis: Are you flirting with me, or are you being honest?

Ned: Let's just call it an intense desire to see you in something other than a designer business suit. (Alexis looks guiltily down at herself at this.)

Alexis (to Ned): Yes, that's me. I hardly draw a breath without adding to the Cassadine cache of potentially useful information.

Alexis (to Ned): It's a hazard with us gatekeepers. Would we ever know a personal feeling if we had one?

Alexis: It's getting late; there's no one left but us.

Ned: Do you want to go home?

Alexis: I'd rather jump!

Ned: Me too. Do you know, they call this the Nurses' Ball, but how many people did you see dancing?

(He takes her by the hand and they start to dance; it's cute, they are kind of holding each other at arms length, carefully).

Ned (to Alexis): Dancing should make you feel invisible, but you never really are - unless nobody's watching.

Ned: You know Alexis, I can sort it out -- you from your surroundings. I don't think of you as a henchman, or an appendage to the Cassadines.

Ned: So, where did Davis come from?

Alexis: Where did Ashton come from?

Ned: It's funny -- we don't have their names. but we have their money and their troubles.

Alexis: And when you least expected it, someone does understand. Someone like me.

Ned: I'm going to have to kiss you. (Alexis looks surprised and a little apprehensive) You could probably stop me. (She doesn't stop him)

Ned: You ought to be kissed more often.

Alexis: Why is that?

Ned: Makes your hair smell so good.

Alexis (to Ned): Oh, I think I do. Besides, my stretch pumpkin is waiting for me downstairs. Sweet dreams.

Ned: They're the only ones (questions) worth asking, Ms. Davis. (Ned winks) Nice chatting with you.

Alexis: Where'd you come from?

Ned: I was wondering that about you. Are you a gift to me from the universe?

Alexis: I beg your pardon, I thought you were Ned Ashton.

Ned: That's strange, so did I?

Ned: You always ask the tough ones. (Ned referring to questions) (Alexis raises her briefcase and Ned tries to grab it)

Alexis: Hands off!

Ned: Oooh, state secrets?

Alexis: Magic contracts. I have to take them to my cousin.

Alexis: Well, I'm very familiar with that condition. Our family mantra -- "When will you learn, when will you learn?". The cosmic answer -- "Never".

Ned (to Alexis) : Have I stumbled upon the secret door to your heart? If you won't run away with me, then come home with me -- now.

Alexis (to Ned): And I've missed you too. You don't call, you don't write. What, were you planning to break my heart from the beginning?

Ned: Okay. I want you to breathe in from your nose, take in all the air that you can. Take it all in. Now, let it out in one long, slow exhale. Good. Close your eyes. Close your eyes. Lift your face up to the sun. Feel the heat against your skin. Let it move inside you. (Alexis opens her eyes and gives him a look, then closes them again) Now, kneel down, touch the ground with your hands.

Alexis: I'm getting dizzy and I have to draw the line at getting down on my knees.

Alexis: So much for floating.

Ned: An invitation I thought you were in the process of turning down?

Alexis: I was waffling. But I do understand.

Ned: Don't understand. Keep waffling. (He kisses her) Java is a tropical island, and a mere mile to the east is Bali. A great place to spend your day if your traveling companion is hold up in an office in downtown Jakarta.

Alexis: You want me to come with you?

Ned: Don't even pack. We'll get you a nice flimsy wardrobe of flowered sarongs when we get there -

Alexis: - Ned -

Ned: Or go naked. It's really quite simple. Just repeat after me..."yes". Is it so difficult a decision?

Ned (to Alexis): Shoot my illusions all to Hell, why don't you?

Ned:(takes Alexis' hand and kisses her on the cheek hello) I need a friend Alexis. Someone to reassure me that I'm a great guy, loaded with charm and ability, before I head home to be shot full of arrows.

Ned: I spent most of my time in air-conditioned boardrooms. Plus I had a secret weapon..late night phone messages.

Alexis: I don't know what you mean. I categorically deny, calling you at all hours, to pour my heart out to you on your machine.

Ned: Hmm, I must have imagined them. In situations of extreme stress, people often hear what they want to hear.

Alexis: And you heard?

Ned: You missed me.

Alexis: You have no.... I was just going to say you have no idea, which is so clearly not the case. (pause) Did you ever find out how far it is from Jakarta to Bali or Bora Bora?

Ned: Tahiti.

Alexis: Palo.

Ned: Mandalay.

Alexis: Do you sail?

Ned: With great skill.

Alexis: Me too! I was thinking, let's get a boat and we can sail from island to island, with nothing but our bathing suits on.

Ned: Throw our cell phones overboard. Refuse to tell our families the ships name or our destination. Live on rum, coconuts, and fresh fish.

Alexis: Lie under the stars all night. (almost wistfully)

Ned: When do we leave?

Alexis:(short pause) Not this week.(regretfully)

Ned: Or next.

Alexis: Or the week after that, because they will need us one way or the other, whether they know it or not.

Ned: Oh, they know. Everytime something goes wrong, they know all over again. Do me a favor, if you actually decide to chuck everything, call me first.

Ned: You're the only one who understands me. Now when are you going to come home with me so we don't have to continue this affair in public places.?

Alexis: Are we having an affair?

Ned: A guy can dream, can't he?

Alexis: Your eyes should come with a warning label.

Ned: Well there's really no place on earth that you can go that he (Stefan) wouldn't be able to find you. Not with the resources that he commands.

Alexis: Oh well thank you, that was very encouraging. I guess you gave me my answer.

Ned: No. Just my way of making sure that you don't disappear on me.

Alexis: Oh my, what would Edward say?

Ned: Grandfather will agree that bringing on board a former member of the Cassadine clan is a brilliant strategy - eventually.

Alexis: So what happens until eventually?

Ned: It may take a little work.

Alexis: So in other words my fate is in your hands.

Ned: Batteries not included. Attachments extra.

Alexis: You've - given me something to think about.

Ned: Good.

Alexis: You don't have to look out for me Ned, I'm a grown woman.

Ned: I know, but sometimes, even a grown woman needs a friend.

Alexis (to Luke)- That's certainly part of it. One on one, no one to stop me. It would be all I could do to keep from beating you with an oar.

Alexis (to Luke)- Awww...You're ridiculous! (drops smile) AND delusional.

Luke- I'm delusional? Then, why is it that you're standing here, staring at Castle Catacombs like you'll never smell it's dank halls again?

Alexis- I come here to think. You should try it some time.

Luke (to Alexis)- Yeah? Then how come "Lord of the Flies" is out there on the dung heap all alone and you're ordering room service from Port Charles Hotel?

Alexis- Are you watching me?

Luke- Like a hawk.

Alexis- Why?

Luke- You're my hobby. Some people watch birds, I watch you.

Alexis- Knock it off, or I will get a restraining order!

Alexis- You'll forgive me if I don't find you as amusing as you seem find yourself. Actually, half the time I'm not even listening to you. And the other half, I haven't a clue what you're saying!

Alexis (to Luke)- I'm talking about your presence on earth!

Alexis (to Luke) Please. Not you. Not now.

Alexis (to Luke): You didn't come here to inquire about my health, so whatever it is buzzing around in that mangled circuitry you call a mind, then let's hear it. Quickly.

Alexis: (returning from her reverie) No it's not, Luke! You want something from me, so you can cut out the Luke-bearing-gifts-routine and tell me what it is.

Alexis (to Luke): Because I'm an experienced observer of human nature, and you're about as easy to read as a flare gun.

Helena: You've had more than enough time to consider my offer.

Alexis: It's not an offer. It's a threat.

Helena: It's a matter of interpretation.

Alexis: Work with you...or else?

Helena: There, you see? We're getting to know each other already.

Alexis (about Ari after he kisses her hand): How charming. A kidnapper with a David Nivens complex.

Helena: A leisurely meal will give us a chance to open up.

Alexis: What's on the menu? Ground Glass?

Ned (to AJ): Grandfather cracked the service door and you slithered right in. Waiving your clean and sober card.

Alexis (to Helena): Ari seems to have many talents...handyman, cook...abductor.

Ned (to AJ): My tires were slashed. All four of them. And I remember thinking at the time ..only a sick, vicious fool would do such a thing. I guess I was right.

Alexis: I never realized you felt such distaste for him (Justus).

Ned: I did. And now, if I'm lucky, I'll never have to think about him...ever again.

Ned: Justus walked out. And Grandfather is treating it as if it is some cataclysmic loss.

Alexis: And you?

Ned: I practically held the door open for him.

Alexis: You lost Justus?

Ned: Well, he was one of the casualties. My family also lost their collective minds.

Alexis: How can you tell?

Alexis: Hello, Nikolas. It's me. So, Nikolas, it turns out that you've missed a lot of excitement at home. Your Uncle wants to banish me. And your Grandmother wants to murder me. What family doesn't have its disagreements? I think I've come down with this heriditary illness that strikes every generation of Cassadines. Irony. I made your Uncle believe a lie, and now, I can't get him to see the truth. I suppose there's a cruel justice in that.

And you and I aren't going to get our heart's desire anyway. You've been wanting to escape the Cassadines, and I've been wanting to break in. If it's any consolation to you, you really do have the better part of the deal. It won't be long before Helena and Stefan tell you all the family secrets. All, but the one they won't even reveal to themselves. See, the Cassadines think they're at war with the world. But our family is the real battleground. And Nikolas, the problem is, I don't know what side I'm on anymore.

Alexis (to Stefan): I'm not giving up on you.

Stefan: If any of this story were remotely true, it would only be more incentive for you to flee this family. If Helena knew, she would kill you.

Alexis: Helena does know. And if you don't protect me....

Stefan: What? WHAT?!?

Alexis: The woman will SLAUGHTER me.

Alexis (to Stefan): Here are the documents the workers found at the villa. Read them and call me a liar. Or, call me your sister.

Alexis (to Stefan): Thanks to the raging testosterone of the Cassadine men, our family tree is more like a jungle.

Alexis: Is it really that difficult to believe that Natasha could be me?

Stefan: No, Alexis. It's not difficult to believe. It's impossible.

Ned (to Brenda on the phone): But desperate to see me, right?

Edward: Nobody can be that desperate, Ned.

Tony: She stole money from our account.

Alexis: If it's a joint account, it's not stealing.

Luke (as he looks at Stefan): Yeah, well, you can sign for me anytime I need surgery, Ms. Davis. I'm not nearly so picky about who saves my life.

Alexis: Katherine? I thoguht that the policy was for family only.

Kat: It is. But don't worry. I'll let you know how Nikolas is.

Luke (to Alexis) : You didn't do anything wrong. You sigens a paper so that the kid's life could be saved. Now, if your brother's got a problem with that, where are his priorities?

Ned (to Alexis about his office): It's heated. The Seating's comfortable. And the best part is.....from my office, Wyndemere is very small.

Alexis: This isn't chess.

Ned: Of course it is. And it's the only game your cousin knows how to play. Now he will need you again, Alexis. He knows that. Even though he won't admit it. So, my advise to you is to wait Stefan out. And when he comes back to you, you just make him pay.

Alexis: You're good at this.

Ned: So are you.

Ned (to Alexis): The gatekeeper, no matter how despised, is the most valuable player on the board, she moves everywhere, influences every decision, and knows all the secrets. You have to be stupid to remove a piece like that from the board.

Edward: ELQ Jakarta?

Ned: It'll be back in our hands within the next 48 hours. Give or take an International Dateline. Jax and I just got the word.

Edward: As much as I hate to give that Australian reptile credit for anything, this revenge is going to be very sweet.

Edward: Our illustrious Hospital CEO is out tracking down Katherine Bell again.

Ned: Why?

Edward: I'd say it was a change of heart if I thought he had one.

Ned: Hey Junior, tell me...Have you seen any good abs lately?

AJ: Been held up at gunpoint by your mother lately?

Alexis: I never wanted another living soul to know about this.

Luke: I'm sure. I understand. But I know. So, I think you'll agree that you won't be so quick to ignore me, or walk away from me, or PEEVE me in anyway. It's nice meeting you, Natasha.

Alexis: I came to decline your invitation, with regret.

Luke: Aw thats a shame, your the first Cassidine I ever invited anywhere, except to hell.

Alexis: All the more reason to refuse.

Alexis: I found out who I am.

Ned: Hope that doesn't happen to me.

Alexis: And it could kill me. It's out of my hands.

Ned (singing): " Over the river and through the woods to Grandfather's house we go.."....OK. So, technically it's Monica's House, but I know how you hate to be reminded.

Alexis: Cassadines don't have that kind of patience. In my family, loyalty is fierce and consistent, and if anyone violates the family law, well, rejection is final.

Alexis: I savaged a member of my own family. How much worse does it have to get?

Alexis (about Stefan): He has always been my friend. And my protector. We've always fought on the same side of every battle and I don't know how I'm ever going to think of him as my enemy.

Alexis (to Nikolas): You've always been fair. Even when you were angry. You were the one born with compassion. I don't know how that happened in this family.

AJ (to the robber): This decantor right here is leaded crystal.

Ned: And he would know. He's examined it often...at close range.

Alexis: My relationship with Stefan is irrevocably finished.

Alexis: Edward. I trust that you'll be at the Board meeting.

Edward: Stefan Cassadine is going to be saying goodbye? You can bet your Greek Olives I'll be there.

Alexis: So, I can put that down as a yes?

Edward: You can put that down as a Hell yes.

(Alexis tells Ned that he needs to stop her when she starts rambling on)

Ned- I think you're one of the most fascinating women I have ever met, and the fact that you could entertain the thought, even for a moment, that you could be anything less than spectacular, I just don't understand.

Alexis- I REALLY like you.

Ned- Then why are you so far away?

(Ned questioning Alexis about her fantasy)

Ned- Are we lovers?

Alexis- Not yet.

Ned- What could we possibly be thinking of?

Alexis- I was thinking maybe we were doing too much thinking.

(After the first time they made love)

A- Do you think it was incredibly brilliant or unbelievably stupid that we waited this long?

(same conversation as above)

A- This is working out amazingly well.

(During a staged fight at the PC Grille for the benefit of Ned's family)

N- I hear clever. I hear smooth, but I don't hear a denial.

A- Well then you're not listening.

(same staged fight as above)

N- You should have watched your back Alexis.

A- Well now you can watch it. (walks away)

(celebrating after tricking the Quartermaines)

A- So AJ gets what he wants.

N- Uh-huh.

A- You get what you want.

N- Uh-huh.

A- Now it's my turn. (pushes him onto the couch)

(Ned and Alexis dreaming about running away, but knowing it could never happen)

N- Do me a favor. If you actually decide to chuck everything, call me first.

A- I'll leave you a message on your voice mail.

(Ned calls to ask Alexis to dinner and share the "rack of lamb for two")

A- What if I told you I was a vegetarian?

N- I would say order a carrot stick as long as we're together.

A- Good answer.

. (During their big confrontation because of the Jakarta take-over)

A- Why are you changing the rules now?

N- Excuse me Alexis, but the role of the person stabbed in the back is already taken.

(Alexis accuses Ned of lying to her about him telling his family about her involvement with Jakarta.)

N- Well mutual suspicion is where we came in.

(Ned trying to get Alexis to tell him why she and Stefan had a falling out)

N- Was it business? Nikolas? Did you forget to send Stefan a birthday card?

N- When are you going to come home with me so we don't have to continue this affair in public places?

A- Are we having an affair?

N- A guy can dream can't he?

N- You'll never guess what just popped into my mind.

A- The witty comeback to the first girl that turned you down.

N- Are you being deliberately difficult?

A- Why yes I am, but don't let that stop you.

(Ned surprises Alexis in her hotel suite with chocolate covered strawberries)

A- Is there any limit to your talents?

N- You have all night to find out.

(Running into each other at the hospital because of their cousins being in the ER)

N- I hope that your cousin is okay.

A- Thanks. You too. Where is the orchestra music when we need it?

N- I am just glad that I don't have to do business with you.

A- Why is that?

N- It would be much too distracting.

N- I can see us now, curled up by the swimming pool, while I regale you with horror stories of the Quartermaine family.

A- I can hardly wait.

(Ned asks her when she is free for dinner)

A- Is this where I am suppose to act coy?

N- I am willing to skip that part if you are.

(Ned finds Alexis at the Outback after he has had a rough day)

A- I am sorry. I thought that you were Ned Ashton.

N- That's funny, so did I.

A- Then who are you?

N- You always ask the tough ones.

(Alexis seeing Ned for the first time since he asked her to come home with him)

A- You don't call. You don't write. What? Are you planning to break my heart from the beginning?

(Ned asking Alexis to come to Jakarta with him)

N- Don't even pack. We'll get you a nice, flimsy wardrobe of flowered sarongs when we get there.

A- Ned...

N- Or go naked. It's really quite simple, just repeat after me..."yes".

(Ned leaving for Jakarta on business)

N- Maybe I'll send you an anonymus, dirty email.

A- I'll know it's from you if everything is spelled correctly.

(Alexis leaving a message on Ned's voice mail while he is in Jakarta)

A- The weather is nice here. They say the leaf colors are past it's peak. I hope you come home before I am past mine.

(same message as above)

A- It's late and I'm going home, and I wish I were going home with you...And I wish there was some way to delete that last sentence from your voice mail.

~*~*~*~*~

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