The Discussion
Amber Andersen

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer characters. They belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, etc. I'm just borrowing them.

Author's Notes: This is the sequel to "The Return of Angel"


Part 1

After I was reunited with Angel, I led him into my house and up to my bedroom. We snuggled for about ten minutes before I realized that I had to get some things off my chest.

I pulled away from his arms and looked at him clearly for the first time since I had flung myself into his arms. I lifted his head up and forced him to look into my eyes. As I stared into those deep, dark, beautiful, brown eyes, something inside me snapped. Being in his arms felt so right, and yet something was wrong. All the pain he caused me when he left. . . That didn't just go away just because he came back. I needed to tell him about my fears. Imagine, the almighty Vampire Slayer afraid.

"Angel." I said softly. "Promise me you'll never leave again."

"I promise." he said quietly.

His just saying the words suddenly weren't enough. I needed to convince him that I couldn't live without him. I needed to tell him how after he left, I had lived in my own private hell for three years. I needed to tell him how his breaking up with him had caused me so much pain that I had contemplated suicide for several months.

Growing angry now at the thought of all he had done to me, I pushed myself out of his arms and stood up, enraged.

"Your promise isn't good enough, Angel." I spat out bitterly. "That day in the sewers when you broke up with me, you ripped my heart out of my chest. You can never have any idea how much pain you caused me. I gave you my heart and soul and, in return, you gave me nothing but grief and betrayal!" I yelled, sobbing at my last words as I collapsed to the floor.

He was off the bed in seconds, racing to comfort me. Within minutes, he had me in his arms, clasping my hands with his own.

"Shh. Buffy, it's alright." he soothed. "I'm not leaving again."

I kept on crying, not believing him. "You don't understand. Because of you, I wanted to die." I cried. "After you left, my world collapsed. I kept hoping a vamp would kill me. When I told you how I had grieved for you for a year, I didn't tell you that I had tried to comitt suicide several times."

Angel listened silently, probably shaken by my revelation.

"But," I continued. "Something always stopped me. I think it was hope that you would come back."

"And that day when you left, why didn't you say goodbye?" I wailed brokenly. "The least you could have done was tell me that there was still hope."

I dried my eyes and glanced at his face to see his reaction.

He looked mournful, and filled with regrets.

I knew that I need to say one more thing to sum everything up in case he didn't get how much I needed him in my life.

"So," I said. "I need you to convince me that your promise was sincere. I've described to you what happened to me the first time you left. Don't get my hopes up and then leave again." I spoke with all my heart. Please let it be enough. I prayed.

He looked down at me, into my eyes, and I saw for the first time that his eyes brimmed with tears. "No, Buffy. Never again." he whispered softly. "I love you too much to ever leave you alone with your pain again."

And I believed him. I finally believed when he murmured, "I promise." I had done it. I had my Angel back.

Part 2

The kiss, when it came, was unbelievable. Within it was three years of longing and desire. But there was more than longing in that kiss. There was forgiveness, which I craved from her more than anything. And there was also love. A deep, unbreakable love. As I discovered all these things and many more, I thought about the thing that had been floating around in my head ever since Buffy had told me she loved me. I broke the kiss and whispered in her ear,

"Will you marry me?"

"No." she replied calmly.

Her answer, quite literally, floored me. No! Oh the horror of that one small word! I wanted to curl up on the floor and die all over again. But before I did that, I needed to know why she had refused.

"Why not?" I asked pathetically.

She looked at my stricken face and laughed softly.

"Because, my darling Angel," she said as she leaned over and picked up the Claddagh ring that had fallen out of my pocket when I had slid off the bed to comfort her. She put it on her left hand on her ring finger.

Buffy kissed me gently on the lips and whispered in my ear, "We're already married."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"The Claddagh ring doesn't just mean I belong to someone. It's also and Irish wedding band. Surely you know that. You are my husband." she finished quietly.

Of course! I thought quickly. The ring was not just a symbol of love, friendship, and loyalty. It also meant marriage! How could I have forgotten?!

Buffy saw the flash of comprehension in my eyes and grinned. I smiled too. I stopped when I realized what a crummy husband I'd been. I'd been married to her for almost four years and I'd spent three of those years causing her terrible pain and hiding from her. How could I do that to my wife, no soulmate?!

Buffy seemed to read my mind.

"Come on, Angel." she soothed. "We'll spend our lives together and you can make it up to me for your whole life."

"You're wrong. I've got all eternity. Seriously, we're only married in Ireland. Here in the States no one even knows we're husband and wife. We should get married here, just to make it official." I replied. "I think I'll sing about it. The hills are alive with the sound of Angel marrying Buffy!" I sang loudly.

"Oh, honey." Buffy said happily. "I would love to get married officially. But don't sing about it. You'll wake up my mom. I've never seen this side of you before." she teased.

"Witness me before I developed good brooding and lurking skills." I quipped.

"Oh, now you sound like Xander."

"That's nothing. You should hear about the time I. . ." I finally told her the story of my life, because I no longer felt guilty about it. Love does, in the long run, conquer all.

THE END