Mental Health

	Hugh addresses the camera.


Hugh		Ladies and gentlemen, I'm extremely lucky to have
		been born physically healthy, physically whole. I have
		two eyes, two arms, two legs, four nipples, I'm physi-
		cally normal and I give thanks for that every single
		day. However, I do have a mental problem. I suffer
		from what psychiatrists call a split personality. No I
		don't. I've had this for some time now, no I haven't,
		but recently it seems to have got worse. How could it
		get worse, if it was never there? At the suggestion of
		my psychiatrist, God what a fraud he is, I have given
		my other personality a name. I call him Anthony.
		Yes, what do you want? Now Anthony is not like
		me. You can say that again. Anthony likes different
		music, books, films, he likes double pleats on his
		trousers, where I prefer single, and if it were up to
		him he would drive a Citreon GX. They happen to be
		extremely stylish cars. But perhaps Anthony's biggest
		problem is that he suffers from a split personality. I
		bloody do not! Anthony's other half, as it were, is
		called Nathaniel, and he claims to be Welsh. What do
		you mean claim, I am Welsh, I just don't happen to
		live there at the moment.