Joey: Guys are attracted to girls for totally superficial reasons. Yes, they are. They like girls
from New York with blonde hair and pouty lips and bony arms and big boobs.
Dawson: Jen does not have...bony arms.

Dawson: Ok Joey, first of all, girls are attracted to romance more than anything else.
Joey: Yeah, keep hope alive there.

Pacey: Did you know the cheerleaders are doing splits in the gymnasium? How am I supposed
to play ball with a distraction like that?

Pacey: Dawson, you're not a little Oompa Loompa anymore. You're a big bad manly Oompa
Loompa.

Pacey: Take it from me, you don't get any play when you're sitting on the bench, all right?
Dawson: Thanks for the sex tips Casanova.

Pacey: You know Dawson, I'm really kickin' your ass.
Dawson: Look, if you wanna impress the cheerleaders Pacey, go shoot free-throws or
somethin'. I'm outta here.
Pacey: Hey you can't leave man, I need you! You make me look good!
Dawson: And how do I do that, huh?
Pacey: You suck worse than I do.

Pacey: It was a joke, man! I'm kidding! You can still beat me. Miracles happen all the time.

Dawson: How's your nose.
Pacey: Broken, thanks.

Pacey: You've never met Abby Morgan?
Dawson: The girl's from hell. Literally.

Abby: Oh great. It's Howdy-Doody time.

Abby: Eight hours? We're gonna murder each other.
Miss Tringle: Well, just don't get any blood on the books.

Abby: Oh my God, Pacey, what did you do to your beak? Get into a car accident while picking
your nose?

Abby: How 'bout you Joey? Why are you in here? Not that I'm surprised, I mean incarceration
does seem to run in your family.

Pacey: Abby, we can handle this one, all right?
Abby: I don't think you can, Pinocchio.

Abby: Okay. You ever been to the boy's locker room?
Dawson and Pacey:
Abby: You ever heard of a little drug called Ecstasy?
All:
Abby: You ever heard of an orgy?
Pacey:
Abby: That's all I can tell you. Suffice it to say that some people in this school aren't afraid to
experience a little erotic pleasure. But I don't kiss and tell. That's all I can say. Sorry.

Jen: Whatever happened to those actors?
Dawson: Well, Anthony Michael Hall got some kind of weird thyroid condition, Molly Ringwald
lost her gawky ingenue appeal, and the rest are languishing somewhere in TV obscurity.
Pacey: No way! Emilio Estevez, he was in those Duck movies, remember? God, those were
classics! So funny!

Jen: Well we can't all be like you Abby, having your little ecstasy gang bangs on the floor of the
boy's locker room.

Abby: I'm so bored.
Pacey: Really? Well, where's your Ecstasy, Abby? You and I can just go on down to the boy's
locker room and y'know.
Abby: I don't have any left. And if I did, I wouldn't waste it on Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
Pacey: You're not gonna let Rudolph join in any of your perverted reindeer games?

Pacey: What do you wanna play? Pin the tail on the hoe bag?

Joey: Oh and wouldn't that just be heaven on earth. Yeah, to call one of these pigs at
Capeside my boyfriend. To be some perky little cheerleader who gets pumped and dumped by
the school jock. Yeah, I'll have sex with Grant Bodine on the floor of the boy's locker room.
Wouldn't that just be great.
Abby: Spoken like a true lesbian.

Pacey: My butt, really, it's like a magnet. Chicks can't keep their eyes off of it.

Pacey: Stay off the crack, pal.

Abby: Guys, seriously, if we don't get our Xeroxed-butts back to the library in the next two
minutes, we're doomed!

Jen: Thank God. I never thought I'd hear myself say that.

Dawson: You kissed my girlfriend.
Jen: It was a dare, Dawson.
Pacey: Thank you.
Dawson: You guys were totally into it.
Jen: Well I wasn't. No offense.
Pacey: None taken.

Dawson: Okay, that whole Oompa Loompa thing.
Pacey: Oh for the love of God, Dawson.

Dawson: You don't understand, you don't get it. Those two words -- Oompa Loompa -- I hate
those words. It's like every insecurity I have about myself exists inside those two words, all right?
When you call me that, it's like you're exposing me. For not being Mr. Varsity Athlete, for not
being sexually experienced. Look, I'm a virgin, okay? I'm not some big sex-stud like you.

Pacey: At least you have a girlfriend. I got nothin' left.
Abby: You have your hand.

Dawson: If I said I never thought about having sex with you, I'd be lying.

Joey: If I say these things, I can't ever take them back.

Dawson: Joey, it's just a matter of time.
Joey: Before what? Before my brain short-circuits and I start bedding down with every guy with
a fast car and big biceps?
Dawson: Before you find the right person.
Joey: I have.

Line of the Week:

Pacey: Hey, don't talk trash. Recycle.