Jax: Help! Hello!
Anyone hear me not that I owe you any explanations, but I was -- I was making
some space in my living room, and I thought I'd bring the boxes down here.
Locked in storage locker
Jack is in storage locker
[footsteps approach]
Jax: Morning, Officer.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Mr. Jacks.
Jax: Be careful of the door. It needs to stay propped --see it jams when it's closed.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Help!
Jax: Can anyone hear me? We're in the basement!
Ofc. Ardanowski: maybe this'll do it. [blows whistle]
Jax: Great.
Ofc. Ardanowski: you know, you really should have told me about the door.
Jax: I did.
Ofc. Ardanowski: I mean as soon as I walked up.
Jax: Oh, now, so now this is my fault?
Ofc. Ardanowski: Well, I would have put up a sign or something -- "warning -- do not close door." That way, people would know.
Jax: I'm sorry. I'm just not used to having someone following me around everywhere I go.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Just doing my job.
Jax: So you keep saying. Look, I have a meeting this morning -- a very important merger negotiation. And if I don't show up or call, the whole thing could be blown.
Ofc. Ardanowski: I'm sorry.
Jax: It's all right.
Ofc. Ardanowski: So, how come you weren't upstairs getting dressed?
Jax: What?
Ofc. Ardanowski: seems to me with such an important meeting coming up, you should have been up in your penthouse -- you know, getting focused, making sure every last detail was absolutely perfect.
Jax: Help! Hello!
Anyone hear me not that I owe you any explanations, but I was -- I was making
some space in my living room, and I thought I'd bring the boxes down here.
Ofc. Ardanowski: That surprises me, Mr. Jacks. Yes, I have to admit it. You got me on that one.
Jax: how is that? Ofc. Ardanowski: you, lugging a bunch of boxes down to your basement? A man with your money, I would have assumed you'd hire someone for grunt work like that.
Jax: Well, I like hard work. I like to get sweaty and get my hands dirty. What I don't like is being stuck in a cage when I should be closing a deal.
Ofc. Ardanowski: you just take it easy now, Mr. Jacks, ok? I got us into this. I'll get us out.
Jax: Really?
Ofc. Ardanowski: Uh-huh.
Jax: And how do you suppose to do that?
Ofc. Ardanowski: by identifying the problem, analyzing the options, and acting decisively.
Jax: Wow. Well, knock yourself out.
Ofc. Ardanowski: you got any wire cutters?
Jax: Lent them to the neighbor.
Ofc. Ardanowski: hmm. Crowbar?
Jax: At the jeweler's being resilvered.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Suppose your arm fits through one of those little spaces.
Jax: You don't suppose correctly.
Ofc. Ardanowski: well, this may be tougher than I thought.
Jax: Don't touch that!
V. drops a model boat
Ofc. Ardanowski: Oh. Sorry. I keep saying that today, don't I?
Jax: It's all right. I can get it fixed.
Ofc. Ardanowski: That must be a pretty important item.
Jax: Reasonably.
Ofc. Ardanowski: I mean, why else would you want to get it fixed just so you can store it in the basement? There's something odd about that, if you ask me.
Jax: I don't believe I did.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Just making observations.
Jax: Try making silence.
 |
 |
Ofc. Ardanowski:
No need to be so rude!
Jax: Oh, it must be, like, 500 degrees in here.
Ofc. Ardanowski: hmm. I'd say more like 88, 89.
Jax: Thank you.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Mm-hmm.
Jax: Would you at least take off your hat? Just looking at you makes me sweat.
Ofc. Ardanowski: regulations, Mr. Jacks. The hat's part of the uniform.
Jax: Did you always want to be in law enforcement, or did this obsession come later on in life?
Ofc. Ardanowski: Always.
Jax: Why?
Ofc. Ardanowski: My father.
Jax: Your father wanted you to be a county sheriff?
Ofc. Ardanowski: He was one. Well, now that you mention it, it is a little stuffy in here.
Jax: I have an idea. See that tiny space up at the top of the cage there?
Ofc. Ardanowski: Yes.
Jax: It's too small for me, but you might be able to fit through it.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Yeah, it could work. How do I get up there?
Jax: I'll boost you. Well, come on. Think of it as an obstacle course at the police academy. Come on.
Ofc. Ardanowski: well, ok. I'll give it a try.
Jax: All right, here we go.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Ok.
Jax: Ok.
Ofc. Ardanowski: All right. Ok, just up a little higher.
Jax: All right. How's that?
Ofc. Ardanowski: Ok, yeah. Now, can you get ahold of my other leg?
Jax: Your other leg?
Ofc. Ardanowski: Yeah, like to help -Like to boost me over the top?
Jax: All right.
 |
 |
| Ofc. Ardanowski: kind of like -- Oh, Oh, Oh!
V. falls down into Jax's arms |
Where's my hat?
Jax: Are you all right? |
Ofc. Ardanowski: Are you?
Jax: Yeah, I'm ok. Oh, besides your handcuffs hitting me in the head on the way down. Other than that -- wait a minute. Wait a minute. Do you have a key for those handcuffs?
Ofc. Ardanowski: Yeah.
Jax: Give it to me.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Why?
Jax: Where am I going to go? Come on.
Ofc. Ardanowski: be careful with that.
Jax: This might just work. This might just work.
Ofc. Ardanowski: Well, I must say, Mr. Jacks, lock picking isn't a skill I'd expect you to have
Jax: Well, desperate times and all that, you know. Luckily, this key is thin enough to -- yah. All right.
Ofc. Ardanowski:
nicely done. You know, with that kind of resourcefulness, you'd make some
county a terrific sheriff someday.
V. Leaves and Starts to Slam the Door Shut with Jax Still Inside