Nobody seems to really want to care.
Nothing ever goes right anymore.
The shallow people attending my school don't even see the half of me.
I'm really a dark, scared, and unsure person.
The causes of that are from many things.
A non-loving childhood
And an abusive growing time.
I'm always so depressed.
Times like this are the times that I hate.
Hours late as this are the hours I spite.
Because when there is time to think,
There's time to depress.
Depression is a horrible thing
Never realizing that there are good things.
Are there?
No, really if there are, why aren't I experiencing them?
My life's story so far: HURT, MISTRUST, AND DEPRESSION.
I'm either one extreme or the other.
I guess I do experience happiness once in a while,
But somehow, it's always tainted.
My true Nirvana would be a time where nothing got to me,
When I didn't care.
Because that's just my problem.
I care too much, everything gets to me so damned easily!
For the rest of my life, if it's gonna be like this
I don't want to live!
I don't want to experience those few pleasures
Right now, the pain isn't worth any ongoing.
It's really not.
Written by: Stephanie J.
6-8-00
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