This might give away too much of where I live, but on the fourth of July my sister and I were walking from Liberty State park when we made this list. It's really stupid but I like it and some of you might too. And this is my webpage, so there. ;-þ
You Know They're New York Tourists If...
they're on the left side of the escalator.
they keep looking at a large map.
they keep pointing at various landmarks.
they keep looking at a large map and pointing at various landmarks.
they have a large multi-focus camera around their neck.
they're carrying a lunchbag, a dorky backpack, and/or a video camera.
they ask strangers to take their picture.
they're taking pictures not just at the landmarks, but with the pigeons, the police officers, the horse-drawn carriages, the subway music players, the chinese food vendors...
they're wearing shorts with knee socks.
their shirts say something like, "I Luv New York" or are the kind of shirts that scream the I'm-going-out-to-the-nearest-country-club-to-play-polo look.
their shirts are tucked in.
they're wearing expensive jewelry with that getup.
they're always interested and smiling at everything.
they keep loudly saying something like, "This never happens where I live!".
they're asking for directions from anyone that looks like they belong there.
they're carrying walkie-talkies.
the kids have the straps around their wrists that are connected by a telephone-like cord to the straps on their parents' wrists.
they buy everything from Chinatown.
they don't know where Chinatown starts.
they have no idea how to use the subway.
they follow the directions.
the kids keep asking when they'll be visiting the zoo or FAO Schwartz.
they rest at a bench or something to massage their feet.
they disinfect their hands after they touch everything.
they still give money to the hobos.
they point and stare at the people with hot pink mohawks, large or numerous body part jewelry, or huge platforms.
they're excited whenever a limo passes by.
the kids have a turtle.
they don't walk at the "Don't Walk" signs. (God forbid they jaywalk!)
they have a large extended family with them: grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, godparents, close family friends....
they go into a Saks Fifth Avenue store and ask to use their bathroom.
they have lunch at a fancy restaurant in their getup and take pictures of the waiters and waitresses.
they're wearing fanny packs.
they're wearing fanny packs and are taking out brochures and maps and rolls of film from it.
the kids are pulling at the escalator belt trying to make it go faster.
they're all scared as the elevator whooshes up to the top of the Empire State or the forty-somethingth floor of Rockefeller Center.
they're wearing head coverings like "I Luv NY" baseball caps, sun visors, Statue of Liberty crowns (and it's not a holiday), etc.
they're mystified as to why the top of the Empire State building is colored at night.
they don't eat or drink anything on the subway train.
the adults are carrying kiddie backpacks for their kids.
they're looking at the signs.
they can't understand the cab driver and vice versa.
they ask someone where the train or bus is going to.
they're speaking a foreign language.
they're speaking a foreign language and all of the above.