I am a racist and damn fucking proud of it!

"You racist fuck!"

I was working in the computer lab at school a few days ago and these latino-gangsta-wannabes were searching for background music to use for their trite, overdone, and boring animation project. Naturally they swing to the hip pop rap rock thug bullshit or whatever they're calling it these days. Imagine, if you will, trying to concentrate on a project that is due in 40 minutes as four jerk-offs are listening to 4 different songs at 400% volume (100% from the media player, 100% from the computer, 100% from the speakers, and another 100% from their own off-key singing along.)
I politely yell at them, "Turn that shit off or I will blow your fucking brains out!" and I pulled my colt .45 on them as I threw my headphones in their direction, hoping they could manage to somehow grasp the ever-so-subtle hint of my displeasure.
They look at me, then at each other (Of course, unable to think for themselves unless they're sure they all think the same way) and after a few muddy synapses arc, their collective neural matter comes up with those 3 magical words, "You racist fuck!"
"Excuse me?"
"What, are you stupid? (Yes, suddenly I'm the one that's stupid) Yea, I ("I", this guy must be the ringleader, taking the credit for the line every single person in the history of minorities has ever used. Lucky me, I found him. I can stop searching.) called you a racist fuck!"
The next few minutes are all a blur, as seems to happen when people push me too far, but in the end the rap music was off and the chamber of my colt was empty. I can still taste the blood under my nails.
If not wanting to listen to trite music about how muthafucking badass you and your homies' leerikawl skeelzizzles are makes me racist, then sign me up, Grand Dragon. Because I would rather be a racist fuck homo queer asshole than listen to another one of your goddamned 400% volume bass blasts.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to put Mozart, Tool, lostprophets, and 30 Seconds to Mars on 4 separate CD players and play them full blast pointed at my neighbor's house.

Posted 2/06/04
Reply to my insanity
gizzo bizzack
Copyright 2004 DRAGON'SLAYER Productions