[Funfic] MAXIMUM ;D
By TFG14VR


TigerMegatron: The scene opens in front --> of Jax's house.

Jax: I'm back, mom!

Jax's Mom: Front!

Jax: Hahahahahaha, I mean from SCHOOL, mom! You're so silly! ;D

Jax's Mom: Shut the hell up, Jax. Go to your room.

Jax: Okay, mom! ;D

Jax's Mom: Don't f*ckin' backsass me, Jax. I can take you back to the orphanage as easy as I got you!

Jax: Sorry. ;(

TigerMegatron: Later <-- In Jax's room.

Jax: Oh boy, oh boy, time to look at what undoubtedly cool stuff is happening on ATT.

Jax turns on his computer and finds his wallpaper is now a picture of five men ejaculating on a sixth's face.

Jax (yelling): Mooo-oom! This isn't the gay porn *I* use as my wallpaper, what did you do?

Jax's Mom: I'm calling the f*cking orphanage RIGHT NOW!!!!

Jax continues working on the computer, and finally gets to ATT.

Jax: Whew. That was hard. Good thing I gave my address, phone number and credit card number to that nice man who told me how to get here.

Jax reads posts.

Jax: Dammit, Blue-Jackal STILL hasn't come back to ATT? I thought I used all my charm on her. ;D

Jax reads a post and spits out soda onto his keyboard and screams out excited curses.

Jax's Mom: I heard that, young man! Pack your goddamn bags, 'cause the orphanage fairy is on his f*cking way!

Jax: Sorry, Mom! ;D

Jax: Wow, holy crap! They're finally re-releasing Battletrap in a new color scheme! ;DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD;DDDDDDD;DDDD;D;D;D;D I've been waiting all my life for this!

Jax runs downstairs and sees his mother.

Jax: Mom! Gimme fifty dollars! ;D

Jax's Mom: What the f*cking f*ck is it f*cking for, f*ckface?

Jax: I want this new Transformer! XD

Jax's Mom: I always knew you were a fag, Jax.

Jax: Thanks, mom! Can I have the benjamins?

Jax's Mom: What the f*ck did you just say?

Jax: Yo, them's some nice ice you got on there, homegirl, you gonna slap some bucks into my hand, dawg?

Jax's Mom beats Jax with a roller.

Jax's Mom: Have you learned your f*cking lesson?

Jax: Yes, mom. D;

Jax's Mom: Good. Now go get a goddamn job. Do you think all these dinners here have been FREE, motherf*cker?

Jax: D;

TigerMegatron: Later, at the Asscave -->

Aziaphale: Like, your mom totally said that?

Jax: TOTALLY. ;D

Aziaphale: Wicked awesome bummer, dude.

Jax: Tell me about it, chica.

Aziaphale: So, where are you going to get a job, Jax?

Jax: Tomorow, I start work at the White House! ;D

Aziaphale: Go Jax! Now you'll show ATT. Let's have sex.

Jax: I'm not in the White House YET, Aziaphale! ;D

Aziaphale: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Jax: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Later, at Kentucky Fried Chicken.

Jax: This sucks.

ATT-ers come into Kentucky Fried Chicken.

ATT-ers: Ha ha! Look, it's that loser Jax!

Jax: Hey, guys! Have you come to offer me moral support? ;D

Zephyrmus punches Jax in the face.

Jax: D;

Billy's Dad: Jax, you f*cking fag, get back to work before I kick your ass.

Jax: Sorry, sir. Okay, guys, what do you guys want, guys?

Brian Kirby: Can I have a Gordita?

Jax: Sorry, sir, they serve Gorditas at, like, Everything Yogurt. ;D

Peecard42: Manager! Jax isn't getting us what we want, and he said he wouldn't serve chicken to those "darkies"!

Billy's Dad: What the hell is wrong with you, Jax? I've never seen anyone so f*cking biased, you ass-craving fag!

Billy's Dad throws a bucket of scalding grease on Jax.

Jax: Goddamn it. I f*cking quit. I worked for two hours, now give me a paycheck.

Jax is driving home and stops at a traffic light. All of a sudden, AlexK10633 crashes into the side of his car at full speed.

AlexK10633: Oh, sorry, Jax.

Jax: Is that you, Hardware? Have you come to take me back to Brimstar so I can taste Monstarr's sweet, sweet penis again? Is that Mumbo-Jumbo in the other seat?

AlexK10633: F*cking moron.

Deathasaurus: Back at Jax's house.

Jax: Mom! Look at the money I made today. ;D

Jax's Mom: I take my share for housing and food. And I'll take some more for having to put up with your stupid f*cking ass.

Jax: Sounds reasonable.

Jax looks at the money he has left.

Jax: Shit.

Jax's Mom: Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Go cut some firewood, f*cker.

The End