TIGERMEGATRON: greetings. as you all know, i am the STAR of ATT so there is no need for a formal introduction

TIGERMEGATRON: this funfic is about me & all my good adventures. this story of mine is one of high caliber. it spans many different year, many different people, & manny different events. it is basically a biography of my life & thus it is considered an epic in the same tradition as the ODYSEY.

TIGERMEGATRON: i have divided this epic into three parts: the common era, the present era & the present era PART II. the present era PART II takes place in the future. thanks for reading, bye.

presenting......

THE MANY ADVENTURES OF TIGERMEAGTRON.
written & edited by TIGERMEGATRON(thats me)

(oh & BTW, dialogue contained within parantheses are pieces of dialogue sponken by me right now.)

SECTION 1: THE COMMON ERA
the early years of DEATHY

pan into a small DOCTOR'S OFFICE.
DOCTOR: good evening, miss. what did you say your name was?
LAURA: laura.
DOCTOR: ah nice to see you.
LAURA: oh doctor when will my baby boy be born?
DOCTOR: by my calculations, any day now Miss.
LAURA: oh, I have a feeling. this baby will be more than average; he will stop corruption that has been going on & be a good person in that regard. he will also make the best fan-made gestalts ever too, like the one at http://community-2.webtv.net/GigaStorm/GigaStorms/ for example.
DOCTOR: Miss, this sounds weird, but...I have the same feeling, too.

(the DOCTOR & LAURA are married, BTW)

LAURA: oh honey, i feel the baby kicking!
DOCTOR: here, i will deliver it on my OPERATION BED.

moments later..

DOCTOR#2: congratulation LAURA & DOCTOR#1, you have a beautiful healthy baby boy.
DOCTOR#1: oh laura, isnt he just wonderful?
LAURA: yes, he is a good doctor.
DOCTOR#1: no, the baby!
LAURA: i know! LOL, anyway this is the most beautiful, healthy baby I have ever seen.
DOCTOR#1: i think i have the perfect name for him...Deathasaurus. or DEATHY for short.

years passed. the baby grew stronger & wiser with each day. soon, the baby Deathy developed into a child.

LAURA: look honey, our baby is developing into a full grown boy right at this very instance!
DOCTOR: the miricle of life is over taking my emotions.

DEATHY'S father the DOCTOR was obviously proud of his son. he showed the boy many things that he had collected throughout his long life.

DOCTOR: *points at a shelf holding two beautiful items* you see these two things, son? they are two very special things near and dear to my heart.
DEATHY: what are they papa?
DOCTOR: my father gave me this two items, Deathy. one of them is a RED DIAMOND RUBY, and the other is a SWORD WITH A BLUE DIAMOND RUBY ATTACHED TO IT. they are said to have supernatural powers, because my father got them from the third dimension.
DEATHY: wow...

DEATHY slowly learned to talk like a good human being. he was homeschooled, since all the best children are.

LAURA: now little deathy, say "people"
DEATHY: pee-pole.
LAURA: now use it in a sentence
DEATHY: peepole are the very essence of what make up our democratic human society.

LAURA was thrilled that her son could speak with such rich vocabulary. soon, though, her chest began to have stabbing pains.

DOCTOR: laura my wife what is the matter?!?!?!?!???!!!??!!?!?!??!!?
LAURA: oh honey, my chest is hurting...

laura's husband the DOCTOR did all he could, but he could not cure the heart attack LAURA was experiencing because he didnt know what to do.

suddenly though, when the time seemed like it couldnt get any worse, DEATHY layed his hands over his moms' head & simply said "heal".

LAURA: im cured! deathy cured me!
DOCTOR: good going son!

(this is widely regarded in the history books as Deathy's first miracle, BTW)

soon when DEATHY's parents began to get old & grow ill, DEATHY decided it was time to leave his loving home & embark on a mission.

DEATHY: mom, dad, I should probably be leaving soon...
DOCTOR: before you do son, I would like you to have something that will surly help on your mission whatever it may be.
DEATHY: what do you want to give me my father?
DOCTOR: this. a double-edged, titanium sword with a blue diamond ruby on the front.
DEATHY: thank you dad, i will take good care of it.
DOCTOR: so long son, dont forget me. -DIES
DEATHY: *sobbing* now that i am grown up man now, i shall pick a new name that fits my strong personality...TIGERMEGATRON!

TIGERMEGATRON's mom packed him a lunch, blew him a kiss, & soon the once small boy was now ready for the new experiences he would surly be placed with. AN EPIC ADVENTURE WAS AT HADN.
END SECTION 1

SECTION 2: THE PRESENT ERA
the events that happened during the middle of tigermegatron's life

TIGERMEGATRON: where may a man find a good place to live, ah here we are, perhaps this fellow will help me...
ZOBOVOR: greetins friend, my name is ZOBOVOR. i am the father of this small village you see behind me, called ATT.
TIGERMEGATRON: would you allow me to live in your village, oh good ZOBOVOR? i am quiet the extraordinary man.
ZOBOVOR: I suppose, but you will have to prove yourself to me.

& prove himself he did. tigermegatron helped out with work, chores & other things. soon, he became zob's right hand man & close compilation.

ZOBOVOR: (with a smile) you have definitly proved yourself to me, TIGERMEGATRON. i now appoint you GUARD of ATT LAND.
TIGERMEGATRON: thank you, mighty ZOBOVOR.

throughout the years, ATT land grew & become more plentiful. when intruding battles would take place in the land, citizens would look towards TIGERMEGATRON in order to get the intruders out of their village.

tigermegatron protected ATT to the best of his ability. ROB CYPHER & BIG DADDY ZEUS met their demise at the hands of him. because of this, most citizens thought tiger deserved a promotion.

HOOKS: tiger has been here longer than most of us, & he shows us the way. he deserves to be promoted from his guard position
DAVEVENDOMLAN: i agree, tiger represents the best of ATT land.
BLUEJACKAL: yah

all of ATT were in agreement. soon, ZOBOVOR held a big gala & celebration in honor of TIGERMEGATRON, & on this day he was finally promoted.

ZOBOVOR: tigermegatron, my close companion, i hearby change your position from GUARD to SUPREME GUARD (supreme guard is second in command)
ATT: YAH!!!

tigermegatron was thrilled & he finally felt honored by his position. ATT was safe & at peace. but for how long??

NEALE DAVIDSON: bahaha, silly ZOBOVOR & that pest TIGERMEGATRON would never know what's coming if i attacked soon...

neale davidson & his band of stupid trolls were feared throughout all of the land. he was a starch supporter of OT posts & had no clue what he was talking about. not only that, but he was a jerk too. & thats the problem with the newsgroup today: too many people are rude & post OT posts. i remember the old intelligent conversations back in 1992 that would last for days without a single OT post.

JAX: oh mighty neale, TIGERMEGATRON is said to be quite a force to be reckoned with.
NEALE: his strength is exagerated, i can surly take him down.
AZIAPHALE: when do we attack?
NEALE: i do believe the time to attack ATT is right NOW!!
JAX: yes, let us go forth!
neale & his band of trolls attcked ATT a month later. the village was unsuspecting of this rade. many people were killed.

meanwhile, leader ZOBOVOR set up an ATT meeting with all the important people inside to discuss what was going on...

ZOBOVOR: what has happened? how did these intruders pass into ATT without us knowing?
TIGERMEGATRON: sir i was battling three monsters when NEALE & his guys atacked so i am not to blame.
ZOBOVOR: i know that noble tiger, but someone must be to blame
TIGERMEGATRON: then let it be me who take the blame. i will
ZOBOVOR: then so it shal lbe, TIGERMEGATRON. you will be casted out of this place ( I know you will figure out a plan & save things.)
TIGERMEGATRON: goodbye ATT i will miss you.

as TIGER leaves ATT he sees the destruction of his land taking place by Neale & the idiots. he wants to retaliate in denfense of the village, but knows he must leave. tiger swears revenge on neale, & promises to avenge what he has done soon.

two months later...

just then Tigermegatron who lives in a cave now picks up neale davidson's location on his radar. Tiger goes to find that idiot Neal Davidson. Tigermegatron searches for years but doesnt find him. he eventually finds him in a hidden forest.

NEALE: ah, little TIGERMEGATRON, you have come to fight me?
TIGERMEGATRON: NO, i have come to defeat you.
ATT: GET HIM TIGER, KILL NEALE!!

NEALE: *draws a sword* engard, retched fool.
TIGERMEGATRON: *draws his father's sword, kisses it* gladly, but who indeed is an fool?
just then the two men fight for hours. TIGERMEGATRON has the advantage the entire time, but NEALE cheats & puts blind powder into TIGERMEGATRON's eyes.
NEALE: hahaha, now you will no longer be the hero you thought you were destined to be.
TIGERMEGATRON: ungg, you will not get away with this.
just then ZOBOVOR runs in & interferes with the fight.
ZOBOVOR: i am sorry (TIGERMEGATRON ) for casting you out of ATT forgive me.
just then Neale Davidson stabs zobobor from behind.
ZOBOVOR falls over & dies.
TIGERMEGATRON: NO!!!

ATT: GET HIM, TIGER! WE WANT YOU TO WIN!
NEALE: grr, this only makes me more angry
TIGERMEGATRON: i still cant see...
NEALE had TIGER backed up against a wall, & right when the sword came close to TIGER's face, his eyes opened & he could see again.
TIGERMEGATRON: i can see! this fight now has a new resolution
TIGER cuts NEALE's head off with the end of his sword.
ATT: YAH! WE WANTED YOU TO WIN, TIGER!!
TIGERMEGATRON: neale has been sent to his timely death, & i now a hero among the pleasent ATTers. so it is written, so it shall be done.
TIGERMEGATRON: but Zobovor...what aobut him?
just then Tigermegatron lays down beside of Zobovor to talk to him
ZOBOVOR: you have been a good friend TIGERMEGATRON & i am sorry for casting you out. as leader of ATT i promote you to the rank of STAR...
just then Zobovor dies
TIGERMEGATRON wipes his eyes & cluches ZOB's hand under his own. he has now become leader of the land he loved so much.
(STAR is considered the rank of leader, BTW)
END SECTION 2

SECTION 3: THE PRESENT ERA PART II
what happens during the later stages of tigermegatron's life

TIGERMEGATRON sits inside his house perched ontop of a high mountain in ATT land. he has defeated NEALE & the village is at a time of peace & happiness.

TIGERMEGATRON: i have defeated neale & the village is at a time of peace & happiness. but for how long??

just then there is a knock on the door.

TIGERMEGATRON: JAX my aprentice, go answer the door(tiger freed all of the idiots out of neale's army & decided to have mercy on them)
JAX: yes m'lord. who is there?
VOICE: you'll have to open the door to see.
JAX: okay *opens door*
LAURA: it is I!
TIGERMEGATRON: mother, you're still alive!
LAURA: yes i am, & you better believe it LOL

TIGERMEGATRON grins with a twinkle in his eye

TIGERMEGATRON: oh mom, you always were the comedic one of the family, LOL.
the two embrace for several minutes.

JAX: ill leave the room while you chat...*leaves*

TIGERMEGATRON: so mom what brings you here?
LAURA: tiger, i wanted to give you this.
TIGERMEGATRON: what?
LAURA: this. a red, diamond ruby to go along with the blue diamond ruby on the sword you're father gave you.
TIGERMEGATRON: thanks
LAURA: never forget me, son. -DIES
TIGERMEGATRON sulks & realizes it was her time to go.

just then, out of the corner of his eye tigermegatron notices a dark light flicker in and out quickly in his room.

TIGERMEGATRON: huh? who intrudes upon my home? show yourself.
DARKVOICE: gunhhg...you shall see soon enough who it is.

the DARK VOICE and evil matter disappear.

TIGERMEGATRON: huh? show yourself! show yourself! *gets on knees* oh Lord, please relieve me of this cup you have placed on me...
JAX: back
TIGERMEGATRON: WB. BTW, you wont believe what i saw. its frightenng really
JAX: what?
TIGERMEGATRON: dont worry about it. JAX, i need you to send for my messenger.
JAX: im you messenger, m'lord
TIGERMEGATRON: when youre a leader, you need many messengers, it's been this way forever okay?
JAX: yes m'lord.
TIGERMEGATRON: now hop to it, on the double.
JAX: how about on the triple? ;D

as you can see, JAX wasnt the brightest boy. he represented what was wrong with ATT land at the time. idiots were blocking the path for experienced men. if it werent for the fact that i was leader, ATT land would practically be overrun with idiots.

TIGERMEGATRON: just do it.
JAX: as you command.

JAX gets the other messenger, named AZIAPHALE.

TIGERMEGATRON: now, you two go set up a town meeeting with all the other important ATT people.
JAX: what for oh leader?
TIGERMEGATRON: just do it.

they set up the meeting in the local ATT headquarters. HOOKS, BLUEJACKAL and N-BOMB all show up for the meeting but MARV doesnt because hes stupid and is ruining ATT.

TIGERMEGATRON: now ladies and gentlemen, i set up this meeting because i have a feeling something bad is going to happen.
HOOKS: why do you feel that way oh lord TIGERMEGATRON?
TIGERMEGATRON: i saw a very DARK spirit enter my room. and besides, you know that feeling you get deep down when you know something bad will happen?? well i got that feeling but it's ALL OVER MY BODY.
BLUEJACKAL: nonsense, nuthin bad will happen.

just then, a DARK spirit flickers in the room.

DARKVOICE: haha, that's what you think dear. *he grabs BJ by the neck and sucks her soul out dry*
N-BOMB: !!!
HOOKS: oh no what do we do? i dont know HOOKS but its all up to TIGERMEGATRON now.
TIGERMEGATRON: leave this place, evil spirit! show yourself! your identity cannoy remain a mystery forever.
DARKVOICE: fine, so i shall...

just then, it is discovered that the DARK SPIRIT is really none other than...

NEALE DAVIDSON!!!

TIGERMEGATRON: NEALE! so i knew it all along. but how did you come back to life?
NEALE: simple really. you know your big enemy MARV? well he is a represenitive of Satan. in fact, he is SATAN!! so i made a deal with him and he brought me back to life
TIGERMEGATRON: NOOO!! can this horrible predictment get any worse??

just then, NEALE brainwashes all of ATT and they hate TIGERMEGATRON.

ATT: BOOO!! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT THAT ZOBOVOR WAS KILLED! FOR THAT YOU WILL DIE!!

TIGERMEGATRON: no!
NEALE: that's not all

just then NEALE brainwashes all of ATT and makes them post OT stuff only. then he resurects BOB SKIR and gives him a shotgun to shoot TIGERMEGATRON.

TIGERMEGATRON: oh no..., this is getting frighteningly worse. dear heavenly father, if you love me PLEASE give me some sign of faith to show that i CAN overcome this...

just then JESUS appears.

JESUS: hello my child. i have come to resurrect your mother, LAURA.

JESUS resuurects LAURA.

TIGERMEGATRON: MOM!! you're allright! thank you God

just then NEALE and BOBSKIR shoot LAURA with a shotgun

LAURA: never forget me, son. -DIES
TIGERMEGATRON: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NEALE: haha. i am now one with SATAN, all of ATT hates you, and i just killed your mom again! and you cant stop me!
just then, neale pulls out a small bomb-shaped box that sounds like its ticking.

TIGERMEGATRON: what is that?
NEALE: a bomb! and with it you and all of ATT land will go sky high to death! but i will already be gone, hahaha

just then NEALE leaves ATT land and the bomb will explode in two minutes.

TIGERMEGATRON: what can id do? the bomb is enclosed in a metal titanium box and wont open.

ATT: MUST KILL TIGERMEGATRON, MUST KILL TIGERMEGATRON!!

TIGERMEGATRON: what can id o? the bomb will explode in a minute and ATT is gonna kill me!!

then it dawned on tiger: he remembered being a little boy, seeing all of his father's collection of supernatural items. his father told him all about them, especially those two DIAMOND RUBIES..

TIGERMEGATRON: of course! the two diamond rubies! they'll stop all of this! and return everything to peace.
TIGERMEGATRON takes out the red diamond ruby and kisses it, in honor of his mother.
TIGERMEGATRON breaks the blue diamond ruby off the sword and kisses it, in honor of his father.

with 4 seconds left, TIGERMEGATRON slowly brings his hadns together, and his hands are holding the two rubies...

3..
2..
1..

SMASH!!

TIGERMEGATRON thinks to himself "did i smash the rubies togther in time, or did the bomb explode?" (hes being serious he says this because hes not sure if hes dead or alive yet)

ATT: HUH? WHAT HAPPENED, WHATS GOING ON? HEY WE FEEL BETTER NOW!

TIGERMEGATRON: YES! THE PLAN WORKED! ATT IS AT PEACE, THE BOMB IS DETONATED, AND NEALE IS DEAD! EVERYONE, REJOICE WITH ME!

ATT: YAH!!

suddenly, a goodspirit enters the room.

GOODSPIRIT: TIGERMEAGATRON, MY CHILD, BECAUSE OF YOUR COURAGEOUS ACT AND SWIFT THINKING, YOU SHALL FROM NOW ON BE KNOWN BY THE NAME "GIGASTORM".
TIGERMEGATRON: oh thank you good spirit, but who are you?

TIGERMEGATRON(now GIGASTORM) never found out who the good spirit was. some say it was ZOBOVOR. others say it was JESUS. simply put, it remains the most controversial topic in all of DEATHY's history, since nobody knows for sure who the good spirit was.

time passes...

ATT experienced a time of peace and happiness for several months. new idiots and newbies begin to post stupid OT messages though, and GIGASTORM is forgotten.

the great hero GIGASTORM is forgotten. he saved all the land and destroyed their enemy, but ATT are acting like idiots and have forgotten him. this is not a time for a hero. the age of a hero is long gone. GIGASTORM is long gone. N-BOMB is long gone. RAKASHAKA is long gone. where have all the heroes gone??
END PART 3(BUT NOT THE WHOLE STORY, READ THE EPILOGE!)

EPILOG (SECTION FOUR THE FUTURUE FUTURE ERA)

Time passes & ATT forgets all of the things TIGERMEGATRON has done for ATT & off topic posts and Marv has ruined everything. TIGERMEGATRON changes his name to GIGASTORM & moves onto other pursutes.
It is now many years later & he has BECOME President of the Untiede States.
just then at the State of the Union Adress...
PRESIDENT GIGASTORM: my FELOW Americans, 4 score and 7 years ago our four fathers brough upon this continent and new land concieved in grace & in the pursute of happinesss.
NEWSPAPER REPORTER1: MISTER president. how do you acheive peace in this new world?
PRESIDEN GIGASTORM: i am remembered of a phrase FROM my child hood "peace through tyrrany""
NEWSPAPER REPORTER2: PRESIDENT GIGASTORM, how did you become PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES?
PRESIDENT GIGASTORM: with HARD work & patience & a good work ethic too.
NEWSPAPER REPORTER2: what do you think of ATT these days? (you still hold the rank of STAR)
PRESIDENT GIGASTORM: you"re right. i DO still hold the rank of STAR. my 1ST act as president will to be to go to ATT land & mame an ambasador to it.
just then PRESIDENT GIGASTORM names an ambasador & he is BLACKMEGATRON1@WEBTV.NET.
BLACKMEGATRON1: "goodness there is NO inteligent life on ATT.
PRESIDENT GIGATR: it IS as a i feared. my ABSENCE has left a hole in ATT & has signifcantly drained it of it's intelligence.
BLAKCMEGATRON: what will you do MISTER PRESIDENT?
PRESIDENT GIGAATRON: I WISH I KNEW. i wish i still had the two rubies i would SMASH them together again & make everything GOOD again
BLACKMEGATRON: you mean THESE rubies?
just then BlackMegatron pulls two rubies out of the air.
BlackMegatron: We were always proud of you son.
just then BLACKMEGATRON tunrs into a spirit & flies far far away.
(BlackMegatron was the spirt of President Gigatron's father in disguise.)
PRESIDENT GIGASTORM: THANK you dad.
SECRETARY OF STATE: But shouldnt you use the rubpies power to fix the world????
PRESIDENT GIAGTRON: i will take that underadvisement.
just then President Gigatron SMASHES the two rubies together & says a prayer
PRESIDENT GIGATRON: Father & mother, please take ATT back to normal & make all th epepole realise how stupid they are. & dont forget to tell them that i fixed things. & make the stupid people & off topic posts go away.
HIS PARENTS: AS you wish!!
just then glowing lights surround PRESIDENG GIGASTORM and all things turn better.
The next day on ATT...
Everything is perfect, all the stupid people are gone & everybody remembers how to have deep & intelligent conversation again & they all had one person to thank. PRESIDENT GIGATRON!!!
RESIDENT GIGASTORM: so it is written, so it shall be done.

THIS IS THE END OF THE STORY. For MORE check out the GOLDEN ERA of ATT before you came here.

[Funfic] The Triumphant Journey of Billy!!!

"Dear Diary.

March 28th, 2001. My life ended. My arch-nemesis did the un-thinkable. He beat me. That spells the end, it's the last nail in my coffin. Now I'm nothing but a dead husk, an empty shell of a man who wasted his life with a stupid rivalry.

No. Not wasted. He was a worthy foe. I'm the better for it, really. If only he were still ali--no. Get that thought out of your yead. He's gone. He beat you. You LOST. Get over it. Live your life like a normal man. LIVE YOUR LIFE. Yes. I accept that. I will live my life."

Lying to your diary again, Aziaphale? You quit doing that at fourteen, didn't you? 'I was only scratching my balls, I wasn't masturbating. Honest' Yeeeeaaaah. You know you have it bad. Why not tell the truth? You want him back, don't you? You NEED a nemesis. You need a reason to live. You need Billy.

Aziaphale: No I don't. He's dead. He fell down a flight of stairs. I don't need him.

Voice in Azi's Head: Yes you do.

Aziaphale: No I don't.

Voice: Yes you do.

Aziaphale: No I don't.

Voice: Yes you do.

Aziaphale: No I--yeah, I do. :(

Voice: That was easier than expected. Whatcha gonna do about it, Azi?

Aziaphale: I don't know...maybe I'LL be best fanfic writer in the Trannies next year. Every thought of that? Huh?

Voice: No. The Trannies are a popularity contest and Billy is more popular than you. You're a joke.

Aziaphale: Oh yeah, I forgot about that...

Voice: You could always have sex with Jax. He's handsome and sexy.

Aziaphale: No.

Voice: Jax is a great guy and he likes you a lot.

Aziaphale: No.

Voice: C'mon.

Aziaphale: No. Why are you trying to sell me on Jax?

Voice: No reason. ;D

Aziaphale: What can I do? :(

Voice: Ever thought about killing yourself?

Aziaphale: All the time...

Voice: You know...if you killed yourself, you and Billy would be together again.

Aziaphale: ...you're right!

Aziaphale runs and gets a knife.

Aziaphale: Billy, here I come!!

Azi slides the knife against his wrist.

Aziaphale: I'm dying, yes!

Voice: No...you're too fat.

Aziaphale: Darn!

Voice: Why not starve yourself?

Aziaphale: Good idea!!!!

Aziaphale ties himself to the refrigerator.

Voice: Maybe you should tie yourself to something else?

Aziaphale: No, no. This will work. Trust me.

Time passes...

Aziaphale: SO HUNGRY. I must be dying now... How long has it been?

Voice: Seven seconds.

Aziaphale: OH GOD. No...

A year passes...

Aziaphale: Just...just a husk of what I used to be. Dying.

He laughs.

Aziaphale: Just...just a few more seconds 'til I'm with you again, Billy. I WILL KILL YOU AGAIN! Hahahahahahahahahahahahah.

Voice: Aziaphale...

Aziaphale: Yes?

Voice: It's been a year...and you've gained 104 pounds.

Aziaphale: ...dammit.

TO BE CONTINUED...