Aziaphale woke up one day, the sun was shinning, his ass wasn't sore
from
his night job, and his jaw wasn't sore from his day job.

Aziaphale: Today's gonna be a good day.

Aziaphale went about the 3 hour chore of getting into his clothing,
finally
giving up on getting his buttons in line. Shrugging his shoulders he
went
down stairs, slipping and then falling to the bottom.

Aziaphale, lying face down: Hey, a partially used condom! A little
soggy,
but it's still good. Now, should I meet any ladies, i'll be ready.

<elsewhere>

Jax: I'm not gay.

Skyflight: That's not how I see it.

Jax: But i'm not...really.

Skyflight: It's all a matter of interpretation.

Jax: But i've had sex with women... well, woman...well, my mom.

Jax's Mom: News to me.

Skyflight: More Autobot propaganda.

Jax: ;D

<back at Aziaphales>

Aziaphale is flossing his teeth... a quick job since he has but three.

Aziaphale: Yeah, looking fine, handsome... Now if I could just find
my
scooter, i'll be cruisin for chicks in no time.

He looks and looks, finally stopping to scratch his ass.. a long job,
considering the amount of ass to be scratched. Finally hearing a
thud, he
turns to see his beloved scooter...

Jax: Cooter.

TigerMegatron: Quiet -----> you. *smack*

Jax: ;U

Aziaphale hops on the scooter, which promptly snaps....

Later, after an extensive repair, which mostly consisted of duct tape
and
tampons

ATT looks at Aziaphale.

Aziaphale: What? I might want to take this baby in the water..

Jax: That's Tampoons you idiot.

Zepheimus: That's pontoons.

TigerMeguhtron: Quiet -----> you. *smack*

Zepheimus: What was that for?

TigerMeguhtron: For supporting Billy fics. It's MST time ;D

MST
**********************************************
>Zepheimus: That's pontoons.

TigerMeguhtron: You'd know.... LOL

************************************************

Zephiemus: Jax, stop being gay. We all know it's you.

We: Yeah.

TigerMeguhtron: I'm not Jax... It's MST time ... *sigh*

MST
***********************************************************

>Zephiemus: Jax, stop being gay. We all know it's you.

TigerMeguhtron: Why don't you?

**********************************************************

Jax: ;D Good one TigerMegatron.. LOLL.

Aziaphale: HEY! This story is about me.. So if you don't mind.

Jax: Sorry
TigerMegatron: Sor ----ry
Zephiemus: Fag.
TigerMeguhton: Sorry... ;D

Aziaphale: That's better.

Aziaphale hops on his Scooter

Jax: Cooter

*AHEM*

Aziaphale hops on his Scooter, and goes on his way.

Aziaphale: Wonder where all the chicks be at...

Joona: Atrocious. It should be : "I wonder, where all the chicks
are?"
You'll never get laid with grammer like that. (3)

Aziaphale: You're one to talk. You've never been laid by a girl
either.

Joona: ... (2)

Aziaphale: :)

Joona: Silence. My people have evolved past the need to procreate in
such
an archaic fashion. (2)

Aziaphale: Really?

Joona: No, but it helps me sleep at night. (3)

Aziaphale takes off, leaving Joona to ponder the meaning of life, and
Unix.

On his way, he meets another mysterious figure at a bridge.

Aziaphale: Hello...would you like to buy some girl scout cookies?

Irrelius Prime: You don't have any cookies...and you're not even a
girl.

Aziaphale: Details, Details...do you want any or not ?

Irrelius: No... anyways, to get past me, you'll have to answer my
riddle...

Aziaphale: Orange!

Irelius: I haven't asked it ye

Aziaphale: Severed Penis!

Irrelius: Just wait until I as

Aziaphale: Orange!

Irrelius: Dammit. Just go, cross... just get away from me..

Aziaphale: Orange ?

Irrelius leaps from his bridge, was swept down stream, and was
eventually
recovered by unemployed Baywatch women with delusions of granduer.

Irrelius: I'm gonna have to drown more often.

Aziaphale rolls on down the road, passing things...

Aziaphale to the narrator: Can't you be more specific?

Narrator Bob: Not with what you're paying me.

Aziaphale: Okay then...

Aziaphale rolls down the road, passing things... and more things, till
finally he came to a fork in the road.

Aziaphale: Should I go to the left, or to the right?

ATT: Which ever one leads away from us.

Aziaphale: Right...so which one is that.

ATT: Hold on a sec..

*Several members huddle*

ATT: Left

Aziaphale: Good... Right it is.

ATT: Damn.

Aziaphale turns to go Right but stops because he forgets what he's
doing.

Aziaphale: Maybe this is all a dream?

ATT: Yes, and in order to escape the dream you go Left

Aziaphale goes left.

Down this road are colonies of nude men, each of whom enjoy having sex
with other nude men...and donkeys. It is surely the most disturbing
sight to ever be seen.

Aziaphale: You know what they say... One man's nude garbage is another
man's nude gold ;D

Aziaphale tries to join the ranks of the nude men but they kick him
out for being too gay.

The End!