This document is a reproduction of an email from :
The following steps represent my plan for increasing my safety and preparing in advance for the possibility of further violence. Although I do not have control over my partner's violence, I do have options when considering an action plan for responding to him/her and getting myself and my children to safety.
Step 1: Safety During a Violent Incident
If we are going to have an argument, I can try to move to a space that is lowest risk, such as ______________. (Try to avoid arguments in the bathroom, garage, kitchen, near weapons, or in rooms without access to an outside door.)
B. If it is not safe to stay, I can ________________. (Practice how to get
out safely - what doors, what windows, elevators, stairwells, or fire escapes would you use?)
I can keep my purse and car keys ready and put them _____________ so that I can leave quickly.
I can tell __________ and ___________ about the violence and ask them to call the police if they hear suspicious noises coming from my home.
I can use _____________ as my code word with my children or my friends so they can call for help.
I can teach my children how to use the telephone to contact the police and fire department.
If I leave my home, I can go ______________ or _______________.
Use your better judgement. If the situation is very serious, do what you are able to do to calm the batterer. You must protect yourself and your children until you are out of danger.
ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS!
Step 2: Safety When Preparing To Leave
I can leave money and an extra set of keys with ___________ so that I can leave quickly.
I can keep copies of important documents (such as birth certificates or naturalization papers for myself and my children, immunization records, social security cards, passports, bank account numbers, driver's license, restraining order, etc.) or keep keys and some extra clothes with ____________.
I can open a savings account to increase my independence. (Preferably in a bank other than the one used by you and your partner.)
Other things I can do to increase my independence include:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The domestic violence program's hotline number is:_______________.
The domestic violence hotline's 1-800 # is: _____________________.
I can keep change for phone calls with me at all times. I understand that if I use my telephone credit card, the following month's telephone bill will tell my batterer those numbers that I called after I left. To keep my telephone communications confidential, I can either use coins, a 1-800 #, or I might get a friend to permit me to use his/her telephone credit card for a limited time when I first leave.
I can check with _____________ and _____________ and _________ to see who would be able to let me stay with them or lend me some money.
I can sit down and review my safety plan every _________ so that I know the safest way to leave home.
I can rehearse my escape plan and, as appropriate, practice it with my children.
Step 3: Safety In My Own Residence
There should be some things done about safety while the abuser still lives in the home.
A. If my partner no longer lives with me, I can take action to ensure my safety and my children's safety in our home. Safety measures I can use include:
· Changing the locks and windows as soon as possible
· Changing the phone number to unlisted or in a different name
· Obtaining a confidential post office box to keep my address confidential
· Obtaining a confidential savings account mailed to the post office box
· Replacing wooden doors with steel/metal doors
· Installing a security system including additional locks, window bars, poles to wedge against the doors, an electronic system, etc.
· Installing smoke detectors and purchasing fire extinguishers for each floor in my home
· Installing an outside lighting system that lights up when a person is coming close to my house.
B. I can teach my children to ____________ when I am not available.
C. I can inform __________ & ____________ & ____________ about who has permission to pick up my children.
D. I can teach my children how to use the telephone to make a collect call to me and to ___________ in the event that my abuser abducts them.
E. I can inform ___________ & _____________ & _____________ that my partner no longer lives with me and that they should call the police if he is observed near my home. I can provide a picture of my abuser to neighbors and school teachers so they will recognize him if he appears at my house or my children's school.
Step 4: Safety With A Protective Order
A. I can keep my protective order _______________. (Always keep it on or near you! If you change purses, that is the first thing that should go in the new purse.)
B. If my abuser breaks the protection order, I can call the police.
C. If the police are not responsive, I can __________________________.
D. I can inform the children's school, my place of employment, and ______________ that I have a protective order in effect.
E. If my abuser destroys my protective order, I can get another copy from the _____________ District/Municpal/Probate Court.
Step 5: Safety On The Job And In Public
A. I can inform ____________ and _____________ and ______________
at work of my situation.
I can use voice mail, the receptionist, or a co-worker to help screen my
telephone calls at work.
When leaving work I can ____________________________________.
D. If problems occur when I am driving home, I can drive to the nearest
police station at: ___________________________________________
or I can _________________________________________________.
E. If I use public transportation I can _____________________________.
F. I can also________________________________________________.
Step 6: Safety and Drug or Alcohol Consumption
The use of any alcohol or other drug can reduce a person's awareness and ability to act quickly to protect her/himself from her/his abuser. Furthermore, the abuser's use of alcohol or drugs may give her/him an excuse for violence in her/his own mind. Therefore, in the context of alcohol or other drug consumption, a person needs to make specific safety plans.
If drug or alcohol consumption has occurred in my relationship with my abuser, I can enhance my safety in these ways:
A. If I am going to consume alcohol or other drugs, I can do so in a safe place and with people who understand the risk of violence and are committed to my safety.
B. I can also________________________________________________.
C. If my abuser is consuming or using, I can ______________________.
D. To protect my children, I can ________________________________.
The legal outcomes of using illegal drugs can be disastrous for a battered woman, may hurt her relationship with her children, and put her at a disadvantage in other legal actions with her abuser. Therefore, women should be aware of the potential losses involved when using illegal drugs.
Step 7: Safety and My Emotional Health
A. If I feel depressed about being alone or pressured to return to a
potentially abusive situation I can _____________________________
or _____________________________ or ______________________.
B. When I have to communicate with my abuser in person or by phone, I can _______________________ &/or _________________________.
C. I can try to use positive self-talk with myself and be assertive with others. I can tell myself that I don't deserve to be physically or emotionally abused when others are trying to control me.
D. I can read ____________________________ to help me feel stronger.
E. I can call ___________________ or ____________________, or a crisis line to support me when I need it.
CHECKLIST FOR SAFETY PLAN IMPLEMENTATION
Identification for myself and my children:
____Driver's License
____Birth Certificate(s)
____Social Security Cards
____Passport(s)
____Green Card
____Work Permits
____Welfare, Medicaid, Health Insurance, AHCCCS cards
Financial Resources:
____Cash
____Bank Records
____Credit Cards
____Checkbook
Important Papers:
____Lease or Rental Agreements
____House Deed
____Mortgage Payment Book
____Insurance Papers
____Medical Records (for entire family)
____School Records
____Divorce Papers
____Protective Orders
____Car Payment Book (if you own or are taking the car)
Miscellaneous:
____Clothing
____Keys to house, car, office, safety deposit box, post office box, etc.
____Medications
____Jewelry
____Small sellable items
____Address/Phone Numbers Book
____Pictures/Picture Albums
____Items of sentimental value
____Children's favorite toys and/or blankets
*I CAN KEEP EVERYTHING I NEED IN ONE LOCATION SO THAT IF I HAVE TO LEAVE IN A HURRY, I CAN GRAB THOSE ITEMS QUICKLY!
IMPORTANT PHONE NUMBERS:
Local Police Department ______________________
Domestic Violence Crisis Line __________________
Domestic Violence Shelter Line _________________
Other:______________________________________
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