"alt.nerd.obsessive"
nerd.wav
"where I dispense
the insults rather than absorb them." insults.wav
"Are you the
creator of Hi & Lois, because you are making me laugh......."
hi&lois.wav
"...No you
may not...the bathroom is for paying customers only...."
bathroom.wav
"Ah, a superb
choice!" superb.wav
"Ohhh, so
you're Bart Simpson eh? Well since my breakfast burrito...."
burrito.wav
"Ohh pardon
me Santos, if that IS your real name..." santos.wav
"... By day
I am a mild mannered reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper..."
report.wav
"....Melvin
and the Squirrels, part of the rodent invasion of the early 60's..."
melvin.wav
"Show me the
30 bucks, cause if you ain't got it, I ain't getting of this stool"
ain't.wav
"...then you
cannot have it..." cannot.wav
"...freak'n
kids" freakn.wav
"no....way"
noway.wav
"...but i'll
let you have it for 100, because you remind me of me"
remind.wav
"Yes sir!"
yessir.wav
"Looks like
you bought more than you bargained for.... hahahah...."
bargn4.wav
"...I don't
need this. I have a Masters Degree in folk law and mythology"
degree.wav
"....if you
put your gruby little hands behind your back and keep them there..."
gruby.wav
"Your emotion
is out of place here son"
outof.wav
"...you made
me get off my stool for that?"
stool.wav
"....this,
this is a Snaggle Puss, drawn by Hick Heisler, it is worth something...."
snaggle.wav
"I will tell
you in exactly seven minutes"
7mins.wav
"Well I suppose
you know then, Hollywood is planning a feature film about Radioactive Man"
film.wav
"I can give
you this telephone, it is shaped like Mary Worth"
maryw.wav
"...then I
would thankyou to stop peering at my screenplay... H o m e r...." Also
very good!!! scrnply.wav
"I have got
to do something about that airconditioner suction"
suction.wav
"So you kids
fancy yourselves experts hey?"
experts.wav
"No groaning
in my store!" groan.wav
"...because
of it's frank depiction of sex and narcotic consumption, it is not for
infantile intellects..." fritz.wav
"..Thank-you"
thank.wav
"...oh oh
please take my $59.00, I don't want it, it's yours..."
bones.wav
"And one with
extra cheese.....Thankyou" cheese.wav
"Oh our transaction
is completed, you may take the boy"
boy.wav
"That is a
rare photo of Sean Connery signed by Roger Moore....."
moore.wav
"...you may
purchase this charming Hamburgler adventure...."
fries.wav
" I am not
at liberty to divulge the party..."
soul.wav
"...it contain's
a very rare Mary Worth, in which she has advised a friend to commit suicide..."
suicide.wav
"If you are
waiting for the Hi & Lois signing, it has been moved to the Springfield
Colusseum" sign.wav
"But Aqua
Man, you cannot marry a woman without gills..."
aquam.wav
"And will
there be anymore splurging today?"
splurge.wav
"..Internet
King, I wonder if he can provide faster nudity?"
nudity.wav
"Ohh, lonelyness
and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix."
lonely.wav