Quotes straight out of my life,
because my life is so damn interesting

"I.....am a closet.....LLLLEEEZZZZZZZ-bian!!!"
~~Me, while hanging out of the passenger window of Spring's car, screamed at some poor people alongside the road

"Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes!!!"
~~My friend Matt, reading the glow in the dark "yes"es off his boxers

"AAAAHHH!!! Nonononononononononononononononononono!!!! What happened to the yesses??"
~~Matt, after someone turned on the light and the "yes"es dissappeared, leaving only "no"s

"Can you guys feed my gerbil while I'm gone?"
"I suppose that means we have to feed the cat too."
"Can we feed the gerbil to the cat? That would take care of all of them."

~~Marika, Katy and me (in that order), just before Marika left for a sheepherder forestry thing in McCall.

"That girl, if I ask her a question, she knows the answer, but she doesn't volunteer anything. She doesn't talk. She doesn't take notes. I don't even think she studies."
"Well, I-"
"No, I
know she doesn't study. She passes all her tests, but she doesn't do anything. She just sits there. She's a sponge!"
~~A rather one-sided conversation between my high school econ teacher and my mom, about me, during a parent-teacher conference

"That's funny. You don't look like a logger."
~~The state cop that pulled me over for speeding, after finding out that I'm related to a logging family (I didn't get a ticket)

"I believe that all men should be captured and held underground and used only for breeding purposes."
~~My online friend Spooky, expressing her views on the male population

"So did Monte have a heart attack yet?"
~~A customer at my old place of work, after seeing my boss standing outside earlier that day, purple-faced, screaming and flailing at the state transportation and construction people that had blocked off the entrances to his store

"This is my Aunt Naina. [whispers] She has pink hair."
~~My niece, eight years old at the time, introducing me to one of her friends.

"So, uh....what's up?"
"Oh, nothing. Just driving around.....screaming at people."

~~Me and Tyler, after he and some of his friends nonchalantly walked into my work with white-painted faces in various forms and "X"s on their foreheads.

"What is this?"
"It's a horse chestnut."
"Can I feed it to Wyatt?"
"It's poisonous."
"So?"

~~My lovely roommates

"I'm Thatan!"
"Satan has a lithp?"

~~Matt and myself, having an incredibly intelligent conversation

"Who makes the long distance phone decisions in our household?"
"Uuuhh, I dunno......
[holds up a fist] Rock, paper, scissors!!"
~~Me and Katy, deciding who got to talk to the solicitor that called us one day

"Chris! They want to talk to the token male."
~~Me, after another solicitor asked to speak to the male member of the household.


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