The Lemming's Test

If you have such a sad social life that you want to become a Lemming, then by all means, take this test. But you don't have to. You could steal the Sandals Of Marta, a very holy item in the religion of the Lemmings. Just so you know, you must print out this test and fill out the answers by hand. After which, you must give the finished copy of the test to either Angela or Kevin to be graded. If you do not follow these simple instructions you will automaticlly pass the test, therefore, not become a Lemming.

1) Using Quantum physics prove that a duck is different than a dragon OR distill sunlight from a cucumber. Please DON'T show work.

2) Prove that 2 + 2 = 5 or 6 depending on your calculator's resentment towards prime numbers. Attach calculator or at least a fifty dollar bill.

Place $50 bill here

3) If some one behind you is copying your answer on a test do you

a. Call the teacher over and make him stop
b. Cover your paper with your hand
c. Give it to him so he doesn't strain his eyes

4) Use a quote from "Monty Python and the Holy Grail". NOTE: "Ni" does not count.

5) You see a well-to-do man begin to jump off a bridge. Do you...

a. try to sell him life insurance
b. alert to fishermen below
c. try their excellent smoked salmon
d. try to sell the fishermen life insurance
e. all of the above

6) Someone is being mocked near you. Do you. . .

a. attempt to sell them life insurance

b. make informative comments about their mother’s eating habits

c. e and/or f

d. comfort them and give them poisoned candy

NOTE: in all cases above by all means attempt to be written into their will.

8.14159628) Who the hell is "The5thLemming"? Do not breathe until question is completed.

24) Yes.

a. Yes

b. Yes

c. Yes

e. No

f. d

42) List 5 colours that end in "urple".

18) Name 7 presidents on the $1 bill. NOTE: George Washington does not count.