Rock Star
         
Have you ever been so in love with somebody, that you want to spend every day of your life with them, never be away from them, but also have them be your living nightmare, and the one person who can make your blood boil.
Well, its like that for Charlie and Jess.
“Your wrong”
“I`m not wrong”
“Your wrong”
“I am NOT wrong”
“YES you are, if the cup has only a half amount of juice in it then its half full, none of this half empty shit”
“Charlie, see it from both sides,  if Apple Juice is poured into the cup to the halfway point and no further then it is half full, if it was full to begin with then somebody drank some, then its half empty”
They lapsed into silence. Charlie stared straight ahead, concentrating on the road.
“Your wrong” he murmered.
Jess had to giggle. She leant over and tickled Charlie’s thigh.
“Oi, don`t make me drag you onto the back seat” he laughed, seizing her wrist.
“Hmm” she teased, tickling him again.
“Right -you asked for it” he replied in a mock serious tone. Charlie pulled over and climbed into the back.
“C’monnnn” he said, tugged on Jess’s jacket and pulled her backwards into the backseat.

Charlie and Jess had a love/hate relationship. Simple. Sometimes they loved each other, sometimes they hated each other. The love and hate balanced out evenly though, most of the time. The two always managed to work out their problems.
They had been going out since the age of 16, making that two years. They were unbelievably in love and already owned a small house together. This particular weekend they had been visiting Jess’s and then Charlie’s families.

“Ohh its SO good to be home” sighed Jess happily, flopping down onto the dark blue sofa inside their living room. Charlie walked in after her, carrying his black Nike luggage carrier and Jess’s Louis Vuitton luggage carrier.
“Be nice if some people helped carry the luggage” Charlie half joked. 
Jess stared at Charlie. She was mesmerized whenever she looked at Charlie. He was her dream boy. Tall, broad shoulders, chiselled features, gorgeous hypnotic eyes and blondish brown spiked hair. Charlie’s mobile phone beeped, signalling a 
received message. Jess stared at him quizzically as he read the message, eyes wide and a big grin.
“Fucking wicked!” he exclaimed. Charlie looked at a confused Jess.
“We got the gig, Jess, we got the fucking gig!”
Jess jumped up, running into Charlie’s arms. He swung her around in circles while gasping “I can’t fucking believe it”
Charlie was in a band with two friends, Matt and James. They had tried for months to get recognized, and now finally, after endless gigs in  pubs and clubs, a man from a record label had spotted them.
“This is fucking amazing, Jess, its what we’ve wanted for so long” he laughed, leaning his face against hers.
Jess nodded, the smile on her face becoming strained. She was happy for Charlie, but the truth was, she didn’t want to lose him to the music industry. Drugs, screaming girls, tours, being away from home. It scared her to think of Charlie being so vulnerable to all of this. Jess knew Charlie could take care of himself, but it was a worry all the same.
“Jess..whats wrong?” Charlie asked, his voice full of concern. He stopped dancing about and sat beside Jess on the couch. She felt like a bitch putting dampeners on Charlie’s happiness, so she pretended her tears of fear were tears of joy. Jess wrapped her arms around Charlie’s neck.
“I’m so happy for you baby” she whispered.

Jess forced herself to hold her tears back until bedtime. She waited until her and Charlie were sprawled in their double bed. It was early summer so the weather was humid, meaning their bedroom window was left open. The net curtain blew in the soft breeze.
Jess turned onto her side and watched Charlie’s face while he slept. He was so perfect. The light from the moon enhanced his features making him look a little more than irresistible. Jess sighed. A solitary cheek running down her cheek. She turned on her side and closed her eyes.
“I love you, Jess, nothing will ever keep me from you” came Charlie’s whispering husky voice. He draped his arm over her shoulders and pulled her closer.
“I love you too, Charlie” she replied, her voice quivering.
Jess couldn’t believe how Charlie had read her mind. Sometimes he was so perfect. She wanted to tell him more, she wanted to tell him how scared she was of losing him, and how the thought of him not being there ate her up inside. But before she could, Charlie had turned her onto her back and was staring into her face. He was breathing hard and it was hot and minty against her face.
Charlie moaned her name gently. Jess closed her eyes and savoured the feeling of Charlie above her. He hardened against her. Charlie moved down and began to kiss her neck, slowly unclipping her baby pink bra. Within minutes they had removed all traces of underwear and were in a passionate embrace.

The morning sun shining on Jess’s face woke her at midday the next morning. Charlie was standing in just a pair of jeans at his wardrobe, cursing. When he turned around and spotted her awake he frowned.
“Where the fuck is my white t-shirt?” he exclaimed,
The loving smile on Jess’s face disappeared at his outburst.
“Erm…I think..I think its in the washing basket” she mumbled.
“For fucks sake” he muttered, pulling on a beige one, which in Jess’s opinion made him look sexy because it brought out his eyes and his gorgeous natural tan.
“It was in there to be fucking washed, Jessica” he growled, as he slammed the bedroom door behind him.
“I`m not your fucking maid, Charlie” I cried, as I heard him slam the door shut downstairs.
This was yet another example of their simple love/hate.
A text from Charlie arrived at about 4pm,  four hours after his tantrum. Jess picked up her Nokia 3410 and read the text. It read:
JESS, SOZ 4 EARLIER, WAS
PISSED COS I WAS ALMOST L8 
4 GIG. GOING GOOD SO FAR,
MISS U LOADS, THANKS 4 LAST
NITE. LOVE YA
CHARLIE XX

Charlie’s reference to last night brought the tingles back to Jess body. There had been nothing for her to do all day so she had slouched around the house in fitted grey tracksuit bottoms and a white vest top. Having this much time on her hands enabled her to imagine what it would be like if Charlie became a jet-setting pop star.
The cordless phone beside Jess started to ring and it startled her. Sighing, she answered.
“Hiya hon, its Ani”
Anouska was Jess’s best friend and had been since they were 12. Anouska  had grown up with both Jess and Charlie and while she had seen them go through all types of problems, she had to admit that Jess and Charlie seemed perfect for each other.
“Hi An, what you up to?”
“A group of us are going out to that new club Milo’s tonight -coming?”
Jess sighed. It had been so long since she had hung out with Anouska and everyone, but she really should be here for Charlie when he came home.
“Hmmm, I`m sorry An, but today’s Charlie’s big gig, with the record company bloke, I really should be here to hear his news when he gets in”
Jess heard Anouska sigh on the other end of the line.
“No offence, Jess, but Charlie reckons EVERY gig is “the big one” when’s he gonna be realistic and forget all this pop star shit?”
Jess frowned, wanting to instantly jump to Charlie’s defence. Her guilt at turning down her friends invitation disappeared and she found herself feeling irritated. Instead of responding, she hung up.
As if on cue, Charlie burst through the door, followed by Matt and James. His guitar was hanging on his back, he dropped it onto the couch and grabbed Jess with all his might.
“We did it, Jess, we fucking did it, he wants to give us a contract!”
“Charlie that’s awesome” she breathed into his ear.
“I know..I really can’t believe it, now I have to go and pack”
Jess was smiling until she heard the last bit.
“Huh?” she said, confused, “pack for what?”
Charlie looked at her as if she was slow.
“Jess, the record company is based in London, we have to go up there for this weekend to sort it all out…your welcome to come” he added eagerly, glancing at Matt and James, who stood there with uncomfortable smiles plastered on their faces.
Jess looked from Matt and James back to Charlie again.
“Forget it…you go…have fun”
Matt relaxed onto the sofa, grinning at Jess.
“So..great news huh, Jess?”
Jess forced a smile at Matt.
“Mmm” she replied, non-commitedly.
This is it, she thought after the three boys had left and Charlie had given her a kiss and promised to call, this is where it all starts. The endless nights of being alone, having to rely on phone calls and texts to know where abouts in the country her boyfriend was. 
The night dragged by slowly. Jess had never felt so restless, there was nothing on television, all her friends were out, it was starting to rain, and worst still, Charlie wasn’t here.
Jess sighed, and decided the only thing left to do was to check her email. After connecting to AOL, three little words that echoed around the silence of the room made her jump. “You have email”.
Jess raised an eyebrow and clicked “Open”, she was surprised to see that under “Sender” it read “Charlie Simpson”. Biting her lip, she opened the email.
It was about three paragraphs long:
“Jess,
    Well, there’s no real easy way to say this Jess, so I think  had better come straight out and say it. We’re getting busier and busier, Jess, and right now I just don’t feel I have time for a girlfriend anymore. This is me following my dreams, so maybe you should just move on-”

“Ohh” groaned Jess, a loud, shrill noise making her jump out of her bad dream. She glanced around for the offending sound. The phone.
“Its 11.30 at night” she mumbled to herself.
Leaning over the side of the couch, Jess answered sleepily.
“Babe, its Charlie”
“Charlie” she murmered
“Jess I just wanted to apologize for earlier, how quickly I left and that” he said genuinely.
“Baby its ok, I understand, you, you had to go, its fine”
“I miss you” he whispered lovingly, his voice going husky as it always did when he lowered it.
“I miss you too, baby”
“Listen..I`ll call you tomorrow, I have to be up at six, we’re meeting this guy at the office early tomorrow to go through the contract -I’m so fucking excited, Jess. Its really happening”
Jess smiled at his child-like excitement.
“It is, baby, good luck. I’ll speak to you tomorrow”
“Bye, babe” Charlie whispered, then hung up. 

The next day Jess woke up with the same feeling in her stomach. It was an uneasy feeling. Part of her wanted Charlie to be happy and achieve everything he had ever wanted, because next to her his guitar and music was his love. But the dream last night had freaked her out too much. Would it happen? Would Charlie decide he didn’t have time for her anymore?
On the other hand, if Charlie didn’t achieve his goal…he’d be here all the time like he always had. Then Jess wouldn’t be alone at night. Or ever.
She shook her head, shocked by her thoughts. 
“I do want Charlie to succeed” she told herself, “I do, I do, I do”

Jess needn’t have worried. The next couple of months went by in a blur for her. Charlie and his friends had got their contract, and were constantly busy promoting. Soon was the time for the release of their first single, “What I go to school for”.
That was the first time Jess had seen Charlie in 4 weeks, the day the video was being filmed.

Jess sighed, and slumped down further on the sofa. She was inside the bands trailer, looking out at the work being done. Charlie, Matt and James were dressed in funky school uniforms. Jess bit her lip as she watched a handful of girls flirting with Charlie. All dressed in titchy school uniforms, bouncing about, flicking their hair and stroking his arm.
The sun shone through the window of the trailer, creating an unbearable heat. Jess fanned herself and decided to step outside the trailer for some air. She was wearing a short, white pleated skirt, and a pink fishnet vest with a pink bra underneath. She flicked back her shining brown hair and opened the metal door.
Instantly, girls surrounding the boys all turned and looked at her.
“Who’s that?” asked a redhead girl with obvious distaste.
“Apparently its Charlie’s girl” whispered a tall blonde girl. They all watched her.
“Breaktime people, break time, go have lunch, be back in ten” yelled the director.
Jess leant against the trailer, smoking a cigarette, watching Charlie, who was still holding his guitar, signing autographs and taking photos with squealing girls. Charlie smiled apologetically at her, and held his hand up to signal “1 minute”.
Jess raised her eyebrows and smiled, looking about her at her surroundings, she slowly exhaled. This wasn’t what she had planned. Her and Charlie were meant to be together forever, undisturbed. These girls were beautiful, that she couldn’t deny, it would be hard for an 18 year old boy to resist temptation constantly. It made her ache inside.
“Hi baby” came Charlie’s husky voice from above her, he planted a soft kiss on Jess’s head.
“Hi” Jess replied casually, flicking her cigarette away.
Charlie sighed.
“Jess, I’m sorry about this, we were told we have to try and seem, you know..available. My manager knows I’m not”
Jess forced a smile.
“So..you`ll spend tonight with me?” he asked eagerly, leaning against the trailer.
Jess nodded, a rush of excitement running through her despite the previous feeling of dread. Charlie would break up with her tonight. She knew it. Just like in the dream, she thought.
Pretty soon the music to the single was started again and the boys went back to filming. Jess sighed. She was happy for Charlie, she was. He looked so happy doing this, and was a total natural. The camera loved him, even the girls loved him. Jess wasn’t being biased, but to her it was evident who the favourite was, and she wasn’t surprised. With Charlie’s model boy looks any girl would be crazy not to find him attractive.
“But he’s mine” Jess whispered to herself. Anouska had told her she should enjoy making fans jealous, but she didn’t want that. She wanted to be back home with Charlie. It was all so new to her.
“That’s what I go to school for……” Charlie mimed the last line of the song while looking sexily into the camera, James glanced at Charlie, and Matt grinned at them both. This was a moment they would never forget.

That night as she applied her make-up in the mirror, she looked down at her attire. A long white fitted dress, which clung to every curve. Her shining brunette hair swished around in waves over her tanned shoulders and the pale colour of the dress brought out her tan perfectly.
Tonight she was finally back with Charlie. A whole night alone with him. Jess smiled at her reflection, she had been over-reacting. Charlie loved her. Nothing could shake them.
“Babes you ready?” came Charlie’s voice from outside the bathroom.
“Coming right out, babe” she called back, applying more lip gloss.
Charlie gasped when he saw her.
“Shiiit” he moaned, looking her up and down and lingering on the middle of her body. He grabbed her arm abruptly and pulled her close, “ you look amazing” he whispered, rubbing his nose softly against her neck, causing a tingling sensation. Jess breathed in Charlie’s familiar scent. It was a mixture of his after-shave and something that was just Charlie Simpson.
After tearing themselves away from each others hold, they went downstairs to the restaurant at the Dorchester. Everything was so glistening and expensive looking. Matt and James had decided to go straight on to a club, leaving Jess and Charlie alone.
“You know, Jess” said Charlie, playing with his Champagne glass, “there’s a lot I want to say to you tonight”
Jess panicked. A lump rising in her right, she lifted up her glass and tried to swallow it back.
“Uh huh” she managed.
Charlie reached across the table and cupped his hand around hers.
“These past few months have gone by in a crazy rush, and I’ve never had the time to thank you”
Jess looked up, startled.
“Thank me?”
“Yeah” he replied enthusiastically, “Jess you’ve been amazing. Not many girls would have hung around in this situation. I know it hasn’t been easy for you what with me never being around”
Jess felt tears bubbling behind her eyelids. Not wanting Charlie to see, she looked down at the white tablecloth. It was such a relief for Charlie to know how it had been for her.
“Charlie-”
“Wait, Jess” he added, holding up a hand to halt her, “I want you to know that whatever happens, wherever Busted go with this, I will always…always love you”
This was it.
“Charlie” Jess sobbed, “I don’t want to lose you”
“You won’t babe…not if you don’t want to. Because if either of us is going to end it it will have to be you. Cos’ I need you, Jess”
“Ohh, Charlie” Jess breathed, leaning further forward, “ I really needed to hear you say that” 
Jess got up and moved around the side of the table to Charlie, and leant into his arms. Charlie held her close, feeling like a total selfish bastard. He squeezed his eyes shut to hold back the unwelcome tears.

When he was sure Jess was in a deep sleep, he slipped out of bed and onto the balcony. Looking out at the late night traffic on Park Lane below, Charlie lit a cigarette. Exhaling, he thought of Jess and the situation in the restaurant earlier. He hadn’t expected her to cry. 
Charlie leant back on the lounge chair, staring up at the stars. Am I so wrapped up in myself that I’ve totally ignored how Jess may be feeling? He thought to himself, God only knows how much I love her, but this is going to be hard. 
Charlie pursed his lips together angrily and slammed his fist down on the table. Stubbing out his cigarette, he pushed the glass door back and went inside, determined to make his relationship with Jess work.
The next day, the boys were told they needed to fly to Paris.  
“Wow” Jess breathed excitedly, sitting up on the bed. Paris! She thought of the shops and the Arc de Truimphe, and having a romantic night in the restaurant at the top of the Eiffel Tower with Charlie.
Charlie looked discomfited.
“Jess..its probably best you stay at home” 
He hated himself for saying it. He hated making Jess feel that way. But to have her around for the next few days would make it harder for him.
“Oh” replied Jess. She was shocked and hurt at the bluntness in Charlie’s voice, “well..ok. I’ll just leave then”
Jess hopped off the bed and ran into the bathroom. There was that feeling again. That one in the pit of her stomach. It had been there since Charlie had first got into this. Right from the day he had gotten the text message about the “big gig”.
Without warning, Jess was sick. Luckily she had managed to aim it into the toilet bowl. Sitting back on the cool tiled floor, Jess wiped her mouth and flushed the chain. 
Why doesn’t he want me around him, she thought sadly, was what he said last night not true?
Slipping on a pink fitted camisole dress, and a tight pink cardigan, Jess left the bathroom to pack her things. 
Charlie, who was sitting on the edge of the bed strumming in his guitar, watched her. How does she manage to look so effortlessly gorgeous, he wondered.
After a painful silence, Jess glanced at Charlie and zipped up her Louis Vuitton luggage carrier.
“Well..I`m all ready, so..I suppose this is goodbye -again” she added the last part to spite Charlie for his declining her offer to join them in Paris, France.
Charlie rubbed his eyes, sensing her hurt.
“I promise I’ll be home soon, Jess, you knew this was a part of my job”
Anger bubbled inside Jess, and was forcing its way out.
“I KNEW?! Charlie, you didn`t give me a CHOICE! You buggered off to London the SAME day you found out about this, I didn’t have a minute to say a thing to you cos’ you were already on your high horse. I haven’t had a say in any of this Charlie”
“Jess.. This is my dream ok? You knew that!”
Jess slumped down on the bed, with her head in her hands.
“Yes, Charlie, I do know that. But you know what my dream is? To be with you, and I thought that next to this music thing that that was your dream too”
“It is, Jess”
“Well you know what? Right now I can’t say I believe that. I`m pleased for you, Charlie, really I am. But please, stop shutting me out”
“But I`m not-” he began.
Jess shook her head, and smiled slightly, placing a manicured finger on Charlie’s lips to silence him.
“I’m going now, baby. And its down to you to make the next move. Because you know something?” Jess said, her voice cracking, as she lifted up her bag, “There’s only so much hurt I can take from being shut out by you, Charlie, so, I’m going to back off and leave you alone, and if you need me, you know where I am”
And with a final kiss on Charlie’s cheek,  Jess left the Dorchester,

The driver Charlie had called to take Jess home was waiting downstairs, and while Jess looked defiant, inside she was crying. Because she realised that, if Charlie HAD been lying about how he felt about her and where he wanted their relationship to go, then what she had said to him just now would guarantee she wouldn’t hear from him again.
Please, Charlie, she thought, please don’t give up on his.
Jess watched as the hotel got smaller and smaller, and then out of sight.

“Switch over, switch over! Its on, its on!” cried Jess, hurrying into the living room while Anouska fiddled with the radio buttons.
“95.8!”
“Ok,ok, chill” Anouska laughed in disbelief.
It had been a week since the release of “What I go to school for” and the  following Sunday would be the day when the songs chart position would be announced.
“Right” came the distant voice of the radio DJ, “at number 3 this week, a new entry! This guys are awesome and I wish them the best of luck…Its Busted, and “What I go to school for”
“OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD” squealed Jess, jumping up and down on the couch.
“NUMBER 3!” cried Anouska
“I can’t believe it” Jess laughed flopping back down onto the couch again.
The phone on the table beside her rang. It had been 3 months since her night with Charlie at the Dorchester. He had been home twice since, and other random days off were spent at his families house in Ipswich. They had spoken various times, and spent some time together.
“Hellooooo, Jess here, girlfriend of sexy pop star”
A deep throaty laugh followed her introduction.
“Jess? Babe? It me, Charlie”
Jess smiled.
“I know which “me” it is! Congratulations, Charlie”
Anouska glanced up at her on hearing Charlie’s name. She thought that after that night in London that was the unofficial end of their relationship. Jess and Charlie had always been known to have rows and spend days apart, but not without some contact. This time, though, it was different. Charlie was a celebrity and had his pick of many girls, famous girls included.
“Thanks, Jess, we’re over the moon” he smiled.
Jess waited, knowing he hadn’t finished. He wanted to say something else.
“Jess…I miss you SO much”
Jess sighed and closed her eyes,
“I miss you too”
“I love you, Jessie” he whispered huskily.
Jess sighed.
“I..love you too, Charlie”
Charlie breathed a sigh of relief.
“Listen, I know it’s a little while a way, but in a month I have 2 weeks off, I want to spend every single minute of it with you”
“Really?”
“Really”
“Where?”
“I don’t care -a fucking pig sty for all I care, as long as I’m with you, Jess”
“I can’t wait” Jess breathed.
“Neither can I baby. I’m sorry -I had better go, some crazy German girls down there waiting for photos” he said with a laugh.

Jess hung up the phone feeling a whole weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Despite this, it didn’t stop the feeling of nausea in her stomach.
“Oh shit” she muttered quickly, before sprinting to the downstairs toilet and being sick. After five minutes, she saw Anouska leaning against the door frame looking thoughtful, chewing strawberry laces.
“You know, Jess, I COULD be wrong, but isn’t that the eighth time you’ve been sick this week?”
“Mmm-hmm” Jess replied, spitting.
“So….don’t you think you should check if your pregnant?”
Jess gasped, and gaped up at Anouska, eyes wide.
“An..you don’t think?”
“It would sure make sense” Anouska pointed out, walking away from the bathroom door and sitting on the edge of the couch.
“Ohhhh NO! This isn’t part of the plan!” Jess cried, running out of the bathroom.
“What plan?” Anouska asked curiously.
“THE plan! You know…the one I made when me and Charlie first started seeing each other!”
Jess fished out a notebook from the Stella McCartney bag from under her bed and handed it to Anouska.
“Ah” Anouska realised, “this plan! I haven’t seen this since we were sixteen, Jess, I can’t believe you kept it”
Anouska opened the notebook. On the first page was a photo of Jess and Charlie at their school prom. Charlie’s arms were wrapped around Jess and they were both smiling like mad. Underneath Jess had written “CHARLIE `N` JESS 4EVER”
On the next page was The Plan. 
“See” observed Jess, pointing near the bottom of the page, “kids weren’t brought into the plan until we were at least 28”
“Ohh yes” replied Anouska, a little disturbed by Jess’s attention to detail.
“Well, anyway, Jess” Anouska smiled, moving the notebook to one side, “you’ll have to tell him”
“Oh…An..I don’t know”
“Well would you keep it?” she asked, curling her legs up underneath her and staring curiously into Jess’s faces.
“I have no idea, An, look..lets find out if I AM first, ok? Before we go messing up the plan”
Anouska rolled her eyes.
“You and that sodding plan” she teased, playfully hitting Jess round the head with the cushion.

“Come on Charlie, mate, this our night for celebrating. You sit over there, me and James’ll get the drinks in” shouted Matt of the loud beat of the music.
Charlie nodded and slid into a strobe lit booth. He rubbed his eyes. He was tired, he hadn’t slept since they arrived in Germany. Everything was going crazy at the moment. And he loved it. The fame, the money, the girls. Except for him it was going so fast that he was afraid he wouldn’t have any recollection of it when he looked back.
Charlie also missed Jess. It frightened him how independent she was getting nowadays. Almost like she didn’t need him. 
“Ere’ ya go mate” came Matt’s voice from above him, as he placed a Smirnoff Ice in front of him.
“Cheers”
“This is unreal” remarked James, looking about him at the VIP area of  UBER-LIFE, the most exclusive club in Berlin.
“I know” agreed Matt, taking a sip of lager and following Jame’s gaze.
“Fuck me -look!”
Charlie turned in his seat and looked in the direction of James nod.
It was `Studz n Barz`, a rock group that had been around for years and were very much a favourite with Charlie, Matt and James.
One of the band members, Shnide, turned and glared back at the boys. At this moment they all pretended to be looking in different directions.
“Oh shit” Matt muttered, facing his lager glass, but eyes facing upwards.
“Their coming over”
“Orite, boys” came the slurring voice of Shnide.
“We recognize you” slurred the voice of the other band member, Roxx.
“Busted -innit?”
“Er…yeah, that’s right” Matt said, nodding.
“Cool, good song, good effort” Roxx said, holding out a hand to shake.
Roxx and Shnide kept supplies of alcohol coming all night. And by 1am. Charlie was plastered, in fact, so were Matt and James. They  were all sitting in a very “matey” way in the strobe light booth, and had been for the past four hours.
“Here, boys” slurred an even more drunken Shnide, “get a load of some of this. it’s the bollocks”. He produced a small bag of cocaine.
Charlie, Matt and James all gaped at it. Charlie was unbelievably drunk, he knew this himself, and probably wasn’t as shocked about the drugs as he would be under normal circumstances.
“Every-true-rockstar-uses” recited Roxx, grinning a toothy grin at boys.
While Charlie downed the rest of his drink, Roxx and Shnide set up.
“Ere ya go, Charles, av’ summa this”
Shnide held it under Charlie’s nose.
“Snort! Snort! Snort!” cried Roxx and Shnide in unison, then broke into fits of laughter.
Without another thought, Charlie snorted the white powder, stunned by the reaction he got. Matt and James started slamming the table in a supporting motion and Matt lit up a spliff,
Charlie basked in the sensations that the cocaine brought, he felt light-hearted and care-free. This was the life, this really was the life.

“Two minutes to go” mumbled Jess, staring down at the Clear Blue pregnancy test. Anouska squeezed her hand supportively.
“It’ll all be ok, hon” she whispered.
Jess began to pace the bathroom. It had taken all of a yesterday for Anouska to convince Jess to buy a test, so first thing this morning they had driven to the local pharmacy for one. The lady behind the counter used to be Jess and Charlie’s dinner lady at school, and knew exactly what was going on when she served them.
Now, back in the safety of their blue and aqua bathroom, Jess had followed the instructions, and was waiting.
“Oh my God, its changing!” cried Anouska.
Jess was breathless. Anouska was right, if another blue line appeared next to the default one, she was positive. And there it was, a thin, but very visible line had appeared.
“Ohhh” Jess slumped against the bath, her head spinning. She was pregnant. With Charlie’s baby. How was he going to react? Tears released themselves from the back of her eyes and Jess began to sob.
“Ohhh, hey, hon” Anouska murmered, pulling Jess into a comforting hug, “look..I know this wasn’t part of, you know, THE PLAN” she soothed, putting on a dramatic voice at the end of the sentence, “and is probably a bit premature, but you and Charlie love each other. it’s a baby, Jess, a little human, Charlie will be so happy, and so will you”
Jess gave Anouska a watery smile.
“Do you think so?” she asked eagerly. Anouska smiled back and leant her head against Jess’s.
“I know so”

The first thing Charlie was aware of the next day was the throbbing pain in his head.
“Ohhh man” he muttered, his voice catching. He turned over in bed and rubbed his head as if trying to rub away his actions the night before. Charlie stared at the ceiling. The drink…then Studz n Barz turned up, and then the drugs….
Before they left last night, Charlie started feeling sleepy and leant on the booth table in front of him.
“Ohh hey, pop star, wake up” laughed Shnide gruffly in his ear, “have some of this, it will liven you up a bit”
And Charlie had been so out of it he had accepted the small white pill with open arms. Livening up was exactly what he had needed right then.
An abrupt knocking on his hotel room door made him jump.
“Charlie! Come on mate we have to leave for the airport in ten minutes”
Matt came barrelling in and sat on Charlie’s bed.
“Yeah, yeah alright”
“You look like shit, mate” Matt observed.
Charlie sprayed some deodorant and pulled on a t-shirt, then disappeared into the en-suite bathroom. While changing and brushing his teeth, the room was spinning around him.
Within ten minutes he had thrown his things into his bag. Staring guiltily back at the mess he had left his room in, Charlie closed the door.
Another day, another country, Charlie thought dejectedly. More than anything he wanted to be at home. The hurdy-gurdy ringtone of his Nokia 6610 jolted his thoughts, It was flashing JESS MOB.
“Hello” he mumbled sleepily, although inside his heart was dancing. Charlie wouldn’t wait to hear Jess’s voice.
“Hi baby” came Jess’s sweet sounding voice, “are you okay” she asked, sounding concerned.
“Oh yeah, fine, just going to the airport. I feel a bit sick actually…..are you ok?” he asked, rubbing his eyes and leaning back on the tour bus seat.
“Well..that’s actually what I’m calling you about, I need to see you Charlie….”
“Oh, I know babe, I really want to see you too…I know the month until my holiday is long, but-”
“No, Charlie, I need to come and see you, I have something to tell you”
“Is it bad?” Charlie asked, eyes wide.
“No!” Jess replied quickly, “well…at least..I don’t think so”
“Well…we`re heading back to France now…meet me there? Is that alright?”
Jess smiled with relief.
“That’s fine…actually Charlie, I’m glad you said okay, because I already booked my flight”
“How did you-”
“I spoke to Fletch already”
“Oh”
“So…I`ll be there tomorrow, okay? About 8pm?”
“That’s cool…I’ll send someone to pick you up”
“Bye baby”

Arriving in Paris was daunting for Charlie. They had been all over the place this week, and were now back in a totally different time-zone. It was 4pm now. After laying out his toiletries in the bathroom, and a few clothes into the wardrobe, Charlie sat on the bed wondering how to pass the hours before Jess arrived.
“Oi, Chaz, open up”
Charlie opened the cream, wooden door lined with gold paint and faced Matt, who was wearing a blue t-shirt and jeans.
“Coming to the bar downstairs?”
“Er, yeah, why not”
I will not get drunk, he promised himself, I’ll just have a few drinks to pass the time. They met James at a table downstairs, he had already got a round in.
“Bastard almost wouldn’t serve me” he complained, shooting the barman an icy look.
Matt laughed, “can’t help it if you look 15 can ya mate” he teasted, punching James playfully on the arm.
Charlie sipped his lager and looked around them. It was mainly all older couples and business people, but a table just to the right of them caught his eye. Three girls about his age caught his eye. One of them turned and smiled at him. Matt was next to spot them.
“Oi, oi, we’re in there, look at them” he burbled excitedly.
A grinning blonde raised an eyebrow at Matt, Matt nodded his head, signalling for the girls to come and sit with them. The three girls stood up and strutted over to the boy’s table.
“Hi…I`m Asha” smiled a girl who looked surprisingly like Jess.
“Charlie” he replied, smiling back. He found himself mesmerized by her eyes, the way he was by Jess’s. Everything about her screamed Jess. The way she looked, smelt, and flicked her hair. Charlie glanced at his watch.
It was only 4.45pm.
By 7pm, Charlie was hammered.
“So, listen, Charlie” murmered Asha, playing with the neckline of her white CK dress, “would you like to..take this upstairs?”
Charlie, unsure of what Asha had asked him, nodded.
“Bye girls” Asha giggled, winking at her friends. Matt and James stared after Charlie in disbelief.
The first thing Charlie did was loosen his shirt which felt as if it was strangling him. When he turned around, Asha had slipped out of her dress and was lying on the bed. Leaning upwards slightly, She grabbed Charlie’s neck and pulled him on top of her, into a deep, passionate kiss.

I can’t believe I’m here, thought Jess excitedly, leaving the lobby of the Grand Hotel in Paris and walking into the expensive looking lift. Jess smiled to herself, trembling slightly. In just a few minutes she would be in Charlie’s arms and the feeling of loneliness that plagued her whenever he was away.
Walking along the plush, peach carpeting of the 8th floor, Jess finally spotted room 76, Charlie’s room. The door was slightly ajar, she guessed Charlie must have deliberately left it like that for her. Jess pushed open the door, a grin spreading across her face.
“Charlie,I-”
Jess froze. Her words also freezing on her lips.
There..on the king size bed, was Charlie, curled up in the arms of a girl who looked scarily similar to her. The girl grinned an evil smile, spotting her before Charlie did.
“Hi there -you must be Jess” she giggled, her voice dripping with satisfaction. Her brunette hair was spread out across the pillow.
Charlie’s head spun to face her,  his eyes wide with panic. He stumbled off the bed and ran towards her., his trousers falling slightly. Jess noticed that the buckle and zip were undone.
“Jess-” he squealed frantically.
“Fuck you, Charlie” she cried, then spun on her heel and ran and ran until she reached the lift. The tears
Please open before he gets me, she prayed. And it did.
As Jess left the lobby of the Grand Hotel, she felt her stomach heartbreakingly. Suddenly a baby of Charlie’s was the last thing she wanted.
“Fuck!” Charlie yelled angrily, doing up his trousers and pulling on a t-shirt, “fuck, fuck, fuck, I don’t believe this!”
Asha stood up seductively.
“Don’t worry honey” she purred into his ear, “she’ll get over it”
Charlie sighed, suddenly feeling completely sober but with the side effects of a hangover.
“Listen, Ashley, maybe you should leave…”
Asha angrily pulled on her dress, how dare he reject her. Asha was suffering more from a bruised ego than actual anger. Her and her friends assumed a rock star was a sure thing. Obviously not.
“My name is ASHA” she spat, opening the door. “LOSER!” Asha hissed back at him, before slamming the door shut, causing the glasses of Champagne on the bedside table to rattle. Charlie ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He didn’t have a clue where Jess could have got to by now, but he would have to look. Grabbing the key, he ran out the door.
“Come on, come on” he cursed under his breath, annoyed the lift was taking so long. He sighed in anger and went down the red carpeted stairs three at a time, desperate to catch up with Jess.

Jess sat sobbing on the bench beside the taxi rank. Her initial plan was take a cab back to the airport to go home, but a Frenchman walking past had explained in very limited English that taxis would be another half hour. So she decided to wait. 
Pulling her jacket tighter around her, Jess stared at the puddles on the ground. The rain was still coming down hard, much to Jess’s relief, as having people stare at her crying would make the situation worse. She sobbed silently to herself. Jess could feel her heart literally splitting in two. This was it. It was over. The day she knew was going to come one way or another. 
Jess wiped her nose with an old tissue in her pocket. The baby growing inside her no longer welcome. Jess made up her mind. If Charlie was no longer hers, then no longer was his baby. Anouska was wrong, they wouldn’t live happily ever after.
“Jess….JESS!” 
Jess looked up quickly, and there, amongst all the tourists viewing “Paris-by-night”, was Charlie, his shirt splattered with rain drops and his face wet, frantically running towards her.
“Jess -please! I’m sorry I’m so sorry” he begged, leaning over to catch his breath,
“How could you do this to me, Charlie? HOW?!”, Jess’s voice came out in a strangled sob. Her voice cracked, “I thought you loved me”
Charlie slumped on the bench beside her, holding his head in his hands.
“Ohh, Jess, I DO love you…more than you could ever know”
Jess glared angrily at him.
“You call that love? No, Charlie, just go away and leave me alone, we’re over, finished, finito, ok?!”
Charlie shook his head, grabbing Jess’s wrists in a desperate bid to stop her walking away.
“Jess no…I was drunk! I still fucking am! I didn’t know what was happening…we didn’t have sex I promise, we didn’t even do anything. Jess I promise you, I promise!”
Jess felt like her lungs were going to burst, and she released the breath she had been holding. She wanted to believe him. And even if he was telling the truth, Jess was hurting too much right now.
“You know why I came here, Charlie?”
Charlie looked up at her, waiting.
“I came to tell you…to tell you that I was pregnant”
Charlie’s jaw dropped. He didn’t think he had heard her right.
“Pregnant?”
“Yes” Jess snapped angrily, “pregnant”
Despite the other emotions he was feeling, the thought of a baby with Jess…it made him tingle all over. 
“Wow” he murmered, smiling slightly at Jess, “that’s amazing, Jess”
Jess stared icily at him.
“Was, Charlie, WAS amazing”, Jess turned away, “I’m not going to have it”
Charlie became extremely distressed.
“Why!” he cried, a lump lodging itself in his throat, tears sprung to his eyes at the thought of his unborn child.
“Because of you” Jess replied coldly, “See you around Charlie, have a nice life” 
And with that,  Jess rose from the bench and climbed into a waiting taxi cab.

“Charlie, Charlie, can I have a photo please?!”
“Me next Charlie, can you sign this?”
“Charlie, Charlie!”
Charlie sighed but kept the smile plastered on his face.
“Slow down, girls, don’t crush him” came the voice of their minder.
This wasn’t what he needed right now. He hadn’t spoken to Jess in nearly four weeks. The house phone always went straight to the answering machine, and her mobile had been cancelled.
Charlie didn’t blame her for ignoring him, she reacted better than he would of. But he was still heartbroken that she would never answer. He knew she had heard the countless messages he left. Pleading messages, although he knew that after a month Jess would have had the abortion carried out. It still ached inside knowing that his child was no more. And he couldn’t even begin to imagine how Jess was feeling.
“Places, people, places”
This was there second video shoot. Charlie stood on the stage, trying his best to ignore the grins of the fans trying to get eye contact. He licked his lips thoughtfully and stared into space. Wanting to be anywhere but here.
“Charlie” he heard someone say in a hushed voice. He looked about him.
“Charlie!” Matt called a bit louder. Charlie stared gawmlessly at him.
“You totally fucking missed your part, mate” he frowned.
“Oh…sorry”
Matt glanced at James who shrugged and went back to pinging on his guitar.
Somehow, Charlie made it to the end of the shoot.
Ideally, he could skulk off stage without being caught by bouncing, giggling girls. But no such luck, the minute the filming ended, girls climbed up onto the stage and surrounded him.
“Charlie… I love you” announced a girl no older than 16.
“No you don’t babe”
“I do, I do! I wanna have your babies!” she cried, sobbing shamelessly.
At least somebody does, he thought regretfully, if only I could make Jess see how heartbroken I am.

                                     *              *              *

Jess looked around her at the happy couples. It felt like every since she had been without Charlie there was constant reminders of him.
The couple opposite her kissing made her feel nauseous, the teenage boy with the spiky hair made her ache with longing, and the girl reading SNEAK magazine with Charlie’s face on the front brought tears to her eyes. Jess looked about the train carriage as it rocked from side to side. She couldn’t face being at her and Charlie’s house alone after she came back from France, so she had been staying with her parents. And now, after arriving back home, Jess wanted to turn and run back to her parents again. She was dreading getting all of the missed messages on the answering machine. When she came home, she had thrown away her mobile out of anger, Jess gazed up at the advertisement posters above her. “TREAT YOUR MAN THIS VALENTINES”….. “LOVE IS…TELLING THEM THAT YOU LOVE THEM”….. “AMAZING NEW ALBUM FROM BUSTED -OUT NOW!”
Jess abruptly stood up and waited for the doors to open at her stop. I can’t go on like this, she thought. She was going to try and forgive Charlie if it killed her. Taking out her new mobile, she dialled his number.

                                    *               *               *

Charlie had an idea. 
“Paul” he called to his minder, “do me a favour, mate?”
“What?” Paul asked, not taking his eyes off  of the excited girls swamped around their favourite band member, hands darting in all directions.
“Go to the nearest phone shop and by an identical phone to mine, ok?”
Paul looked confused
Charlie threw Paul his phone and raised his eyebrows apologetically.
“Please” he mouthed, knitting his eyebrows together and holding his hands in a praying gesture.
Paul obeyed and left the studio, as he was halfway down the busy lunchtime high street, the phone inside his pocket began to ring.
Without looking at the callers identity, he pressed “Cancel” and switched off the phone. Spotting a Phones4u store, Paul replaced the phone in his pocket, and went inside.

“Sorry -the person you are calling is unavailable, please try again later”
Jess frowned and slipped the phone back into her Burberry handbag -a present from Charlie. He had let his phone ring before cutting her off, he obviously assumed the status of their relationship as what she had confirmed in France -over.
She sniffled sadly and searched for a tissue in her pocket, thinking of all the good times.
She thought of the Valentines day when they were seventeen that Charlie had climbed the tree outside her bedroom window with a rose in his mouth. Jess had only realised he was there when he cut his lip on the thorn and had been mumbling swear words to himself. 
Jess even thought back to times they had had not so long ago. The night he found out about “the” gig and had read her mind and told her nothing would ever keep him from her. She realised that that was inevitable, Charlie may have promised that, but in the business he was in he couldn’t keep promises, he hadn’t so far, and ever since Charlie had been enjoying his fame all he had been able to do was make and break promises.
To her surprise, snow began to fall all around her, and within minutes, had coated the floor. It was like a winter wonderland. Jess shook her head, and ran back to the train station, back to her parents house.

Charlie gazed out of the window at the snow. I wonder what Jess is doing now, he wondered with longing, I wonder if she’s missing me.
He had decided to go home to his parents house after the shoot. Sitting on his bed in his old room he began wrapping the mobile phone he had brought today for Jess. Charlie intended on sending her pictures on it when she received it, because if his voice couldn’t convince her he was sorry and needed her, hopefully a photo of how run-down and heartbroken he was without her would.
Charlie moved over to the window again and looked out. The evening sky had darkened more due to the snow. He smiled at the memory of being 15 out in the front garden with Jess, the first Christmas it had snowed in Redbridge. They had been overjoyed and spent all afternoon building a snow man, which resulted in a snow fight, which had resulted in their first kiss.
Charlie could see the light from the living room downstairs reflecting on the snow covered grass below. His Mum was bustling about in the kitchen making a roast dinner, his favourite, and his father and brothers were sitting at the dinner table whilst watching the rugby.
Squinting, Charlie could make our the silhouette of a girl walking along the quiet lane, wrapped in a white jacket, brunette hair setting off her striking features…..
“Jess!” Charlie cried, jumping off the chair, letting his mobile drop to the floor. He sped down the stairs two at a time and suddenly realised he had spent most of the last few months chasing her everywhere.
“Jess, JESS!”
Jess looked up, stunned to hear a voice. Her inner emotions clumped together in a tearful mixture as there in front of her stood the reason she had been so unbelievably happy, but so heartbreakingly unhappy in the past few months. Watching Charlie dart warily towards her now was like an emotional roller coaster. As he reached her, looking so genuinely sorry and anxious, Jess followed her first instinct.
“Argh, I guess I deserved that” he muttered sadly, holding the place on his smooth cheekbone where her hand had touched. Jess then followed her second instinct. She fell forwards onto Charlie and released a batch of tears that had been desperately trying to get out since he had screamed her about his t-shirt the day of the gig, since he had told her she couldn’t come to Paris, since she had caught him with another girl, and since she just hadn’t been with him. Jess mourned for the days when she didn’t have to rely on phones or radio stations or the bands website to find out where Charlie was. 
Charlie felt choked. Tears welling in his eyes as he held Jess close and breathed in her familiar scent. Tears began to stream down his face. Relief engulfed him as all he ever wanted was right in front of him. Charlie couldn’t believe it had taken him this long to realise how much he truly needed Jess.
“Jess” he whispered through tears, “I need you..I just love you so so much”
Charlie’s husky voice so close to her made Jess tingle and it felt like every inch of her forgave him
“And, Jess about Asha…I was drunk, honestly, I was barely conscious I swear, Jess I swear on my life” Charlie’s sobbing turned drastically into full on crying, he leant his head onto Jess’s shoulder pleadingly.
As with Jess, the emotions from the months gone by that had been building up released themselves. The confusion..the pressure…the fame…the drugs…waking up and forgetting where you were.
Jess held his head comfortingly, smiling through her tears with relief as she realised that her and Charlie would be okay -for a while.

Charlie and Jess spent the entire night together in his old room. And it felt just like old times. Jess was glowing with happiness at the prospect at being held by Charlie through the night. Charlie, for the first time in months, felt truly relaxed, and felt as though his ride on the manic emotional roller coaster each day had finished. He had come to notice that his body had been constantly tense…and that he had only felt it truly relax when Jess had told him that she forgave him.
They had stood by Charlie’s bedroom window in the darkness, the only light coming through was the moonlight. Once again he discovered the connection he and Jess had previously had.
The next morning wasn’t followed by goodbyes or hurt. Jess and Charlie packed their things into his car and drove the short drive south back to their house. 
To their surprise, a group of girls were clumped together on the wall in front of the house. Charlie sighed and steered into the driveway, it wasn’t that he minded the fans, but he felt as though his relationship with Jess was still on thin ice, and didn’t want something interfering again.
Jess smiled supportively and squeezed his arm.
“Its ok baby..go and talk to them, I’ll go and them so coffee…they look frozen”
Charlie’s expression changed.
“Jess…you don’t have to”
“Charlie” she insisted, placing a finger over his mouth, “they’ve come all the way to see you”

The girls outside the house all giggled excitedly when Charlie approached. They were quite unsure of Jess.
“I thought they split up” said one girl in hushed tones to her distressed friend.
“That’s what “Closer” said!”
One girl, a small brunette, plucked up the courage to ask what they were all thinking.
“Charlie” she said in embarrassed sing-song tones, “is that your girlfriend?”
Charlie smiled and nodded.
“Yeah, that’s Jess, she’s cool -you’ll like her” 
As of on cue, Jess came out of the house with a tray, on the tray was six cups of coffee for each fan, they looked astonished.
“Here you go girls” she said, smiling brightly, “a little something to warm you up”
The girls took the cups appreciatively, shooting shocked glances at each other, and warm smiles at Jess. Was this the same Jess they remembered from the first video shoot? The girl leaning against the trailer like she was Gods gift? Giving everyone the evil eye.
“So” she asked, casually sitting on the wall beside them, “where have you girls come from?”. Jess looked at them with what she hoped seemed a genuine expression.
“I’m from Newcastle, and so is Molly, but Amber, Sarah and Beth are from London” explained a girl with cropped, choppy blonde hair, smiling enthusiastically at Jess, and then Charlie. Jess quickly glanced at Charlie, he looked grateful that she was making the effort, his lips were slightly curved upwards in a smile, which helped keep the attention from being overwhelming for him.
Twenty minutes later, satisfied with their photos and autographs, the girls let off down the road, jumping up and down with excitement. Charlie watched them go and put a loving arm around Jess’s shoulders.
“Thanks for that, Jess -thought you do realise there will probably be twice as many here tomorrow now they all know your running Jess and Charlies café” he added with a laugh.
Jess giggled.
“Its alright” she assured him, as they traipsed back to the front door, making deep footprints in the snow, “I can handle it, I think”
Charlie kissed her head, smiling.

Charlie and Jess spent his time off at home. Deciding against leaving the country, they spent every waking minute together, talking about everything but Busted, and it suited Jess just fine. It wasn’t that she wasn’t proud of him, for being eighteen and achieving this much already was a big accomplishment. But Charlie wasn’t Charlie from Busted to her, he was Charlie Simpson, period.

“I’m feeling so relaxed, baby” Charlie mumbled huskily as he leaned back against Jess on the sun lounger and shut his eyes.
The snow had cleared up amazingly and within two weeks the sun was shining, Charlie and Jess spent the last of his days off in the garden, tanning. Jess massaged his shoulders lovingly as he lolled against her.
He reached a hand down and squeezed her thigh affectionately.
“I never want to lose you, Jess” Charlie murmered, without opening his eyes.
Jess smiled, this was exactly what she wanted to hear.
“You won’t” she promised, as she eased herself up from behind him, “but there is something I have to tell you” she added, seriously.
Charlie turned with an adorable look of confusion creasing his features.
“What’s wrong?”
Jess sat down on the sun lounger which has initially been Charlie’s until he had joined her on hers. She adjusted her Burberry bikini and pushed her sunglasses onto her head.
“Charlie..I…I’m..pregnant” Jess stumbled. She wasn’t sure whether to be nervous telling him or not. Months before in Paris, France he had been overjoyed, but things might have changed. 
And is it turned out, Charlie was ecstatic. A little nervous about parenthood, but otherwise looking forward to it.

“BUSTED!” clap clap clap, “BUSTED” clap clap clap.
Jess stood on the sidelines in a tight yellow vest top and jeans, watching proudly. Today was a full day of signing for Charlie, Matt and James.
She could see Charlie looked about trying to spot her, and an adorable smile broke across his face when his gaze landed on her. Glancing about quickly, he blew her a small kiss, which caught the attention of jealous fans. Jess blushed slightly, although Charlie’s gesture was sweet, she had wanted to keep as low a profile as possible.
A group of fourteen year olds bounced past having just had their moment with Busted.
“Ohhh, Marie did you SEE the way Charlie looked at you?! He SO fancies you!”
“Yeah!” all the friends cried in unison.
Jess smiled slightly. She had learnt to deal with this kind of thing, she loved Charlie, and more importantly he loved her.
After about two hours, the signing was still going on. Their manager leant down and whispered something into Charlie’s ear, and he nodded slightly.
“Right, guys” came the voice of the man in charge of minding the signing, “Charlie, Matt and James have kindly agreed to stay longer to make sure more stuff is signed”
Screams erupted from the crowd of girls still waiting excitedly in the line.
Jess watched Charlie closely. Clearly, he was getting irritable, but he kept on smiling and kissing and hugging. 
Months had gone by with the work load high. Jess was now nearly 5 months pregnant, although the bump was not evident. It was supposed to be a complete secret, but Charlie had explained about the London Girls.
The London Girls were a group of 5 girls who know where Busted were all the time. Charlie was their favourite, and they were well aware of Jess. They had taken to her and were sweet in a crazy fan type way. Charlie had explained that they had guessed about them expecting a baby. He had been speaking to his Mum on the phone outside the studios and they had heard him say “Well, her morning sickness isn’t that bad now” and had badgered him into confessing. Charlie had, eventually, making them promise to keep it to themselves. Suprisingly, they had.
“Charlie, Charlie -I brought you this” cried a girl of about 15, waving a necklace around in the air, “my parents won’t know!”
Charlie’s mouth dropped open, as used to he was getting to the adoration, it still threw him when girls gave him presents they shouldn’t be.
“Sweetheart you keep that ok?” he said softly, smiling gratefully.
“B-but its for you” stuttered the girl, clearly upset.
“You can’t give me something you parents bought for you, mate” Charlie began to look distressed.
“Come on, move along, a lot of girls want some time with the boys” came the loud, foghorn voice of the big, burly security guard, as he moved the crying girl away from the table.
Jess was stunned, it was odd to see how girls threw themselves at Charlie’s feet. She watched the girl being carried away by friends and security guards. Tears streamed down her red wide eyed face.
“Charlie, I LOVE YOUUUUU” she was screaming, kicking furiously at her capturers. 
Charlie began to rub his eyes tiredly in between signings. Jess watched him sympathetically. It wasn’t just Charlie being lazy, dark circles sat beneath the drooping, unshining eyes on Matt and James exhausted, washed-out faces also. Charlie’s abrupt sneeze shook Jess out of her thoughts. A thin film of sweat covered his forehead and upper lip. 
While the security selected four more fans to go to the table, Charlie rested his head on it. The blue painted wood was surprisingly cool against his face even in the hot afternoon sun.
“Charlie are you ok?” asked Paul, leaning down next to Charlie’s head.
“Mmpphhh no” came the muffled voice of Charlie. He began to tremble, his hands desperately trying to grip the table in a bid to steady himself.
Paul waved a “time-out” hand to the security guard and he instantly put a long, muscely arm in front of the approaching girls, who were watching Charlie in curious horror.
Jess tried to climb onto the stage, but Paul shook his head, then turned to their make-up artist.
“Annie -take Jess to the car”
Annie obeyed and signalled for Jess to follow her. With a last glance back at Charlie, she walked down to the blacked out, air-conditioned car.
“Come on, mate” groaned Paul. He pulled Charlie off of the table. Charlie’s eyes were drooping and distant, his mouth was open.
“I wunmtt go homm”
“We’re taking ya home, mate, don’t worry” said Matt, pulling one of Charlie’s arms around his shoulder. Paul took the other and together they helped Charlie to the car.
Jess was already waiting inside on the backseat, a pillow ready on her lap for Charlie to rest. When he got in Jess turned into Mother-mode.
“Take that blazer off, babe, you need to cool down”
“Mmm” Charlie mumbled, barely aware of what she had said. Jess assisted him in removing his blazer and sweatshirt, which no doubt had helped him over heat. Having done that,  Charlie laid down to rest on Jess’s lap.
She ran her fingers comfortingly through his blonde and brown streaked spiky hair. He moaned his approval and squeezed her thigh with his weak fingers.
The signing ended then. Matt and James weren’t feeling their best either and were slumped in the seats in front of Jess and Charlie, waiting to be taken home. The car, which was usually alive with the sound of three teenage boys living a dream, was so quiet and calm the silence could have been cut with a knife.
James placed his rucksack against the window and after having two painkillers for his sore head, he closed his eyes and dreamt of home. Matt leant his face against the cool glass and also closed his eyes, and realised the last year had gone by so fast he had hardy any recollection of it. He pulled at a loose thread on his jeans and sat silently. Charlie remained half asleep on Jess’s lap. 
In all of their dreams, they never imagined this would be where they were almost a year later. And with a final squeeze of Jess’s thigh, Charlie drifted into a deep sleep, and dreamt of his new life as a rock star.
                                                                             THE END