Um....I apologize for this......This fic has been eating
at me for a
while...might as well get it out.....sorry....
Disclaimer: I don't own any characters....except Helen Chang.
Warnings: Angst, shonen ai, Helen's POV
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Papa, what happened to our family? We used to be so happy.
Remember when we
used to go to the park and have picnics? When daddy would push me
as high as
I wanted on the swing while you just laughed and shook your head?
You
remember, don't you? Why don't we ever do that anymore? Remember
when you
and daddy used to brush my hair every morning before school? I
remember, I
wanted to be like both of you so much, I didn't know if I wanted
my hair in
a ponytail or a braid. Once, I even told you to put my hair in
both at once,
a ponytail on one side and a braid at the other. You shook your
head
disapprovingly, saying it was not sensible, but I could see you
were holding
back your laughter, while daddy just giggled and said it was a
good
suggestion. What happened? Why don't we do that anymore?
Sometimes, at night, I can hear you and daddy yell at each other
in your
room. Did you or daddy do something wrong? I remember whenever
*I* did
something wrong, I got scolded. Like, when climbed up the jungle
gym though
I wasn't supposed to and fell and scraped my knee. You yelled at
me then,
but daddy came and kissed the boo-boo away and told me you loved
me even
though you yelled at me. I know that already because you said
sorry that
night. Is it my fault you and daddy are angry at each other? I'm
sorry, I
didn't mean to do it. I promise I won't do anything wrong
anymore. I'll be a
good girl and listen to everything you and daddy tell me. If I do
that, you
and daddy won't be mad anymore, right? We'll be happy again,
won't we?
Do you ever hear daddy crying, papa? I heard him lots of times
when you have
a fight. Why was daddy crying? Did I make him sad also? I tried
to say
sorry, but daddy said it wasn't my fault. Is it, papa? I asked
daddy what
was the matter but he just smiled and said nothing was the
matter. What's
wrong, papa? You'd know, wouldn't you? You know everything, you
*must* know
what's wrong. Why won't you tell me?
Why don't you and daddy sleep in the same room anymore? I
remember you used
to tell me how much you loved daddy's chestnut hair. Well, how
could you
touch it if you're not in the same room?
Papa, why are your cheeks wet? Your eyes are as wide as quarters.
Look,
papa, I found your knife. It's a mess, it has wine all over it.
See? I'm
being a good girl, I won't play with it this time. Remember when
I found it
when I was looking through your desk and got a cut on my finger?
It hurt a
lot, and I had some red water on it, it was the same color as the
wine!
Daddy should know better than to play with your knife, he might
get hurt
just like I did! I'm sorry, papa, I didn't make this mess. I came
into
daddy's room and it was there already. I tried to wake daddy up
so he could
clean the mess, but he wouldn't wake up. He must have been very
tired and
sleepy. You'll clean it up, won't you, papa? I would have been a
good girl
and done it myself but I
can't reach the paper towels. Why do you look so sad, papa?
Daddy's just
sleeping. Don't worry, he'll wake up soon. He'll be angry when he
does
though, his long hair is stained red by the wine. When *will* he
wake up,
papa? I wish he'd wake up faster. Everything will be all right,
when he
does, won't it? Everything will turn out ok like it always does,
right? You
and daddy will make up and love each other again and we will be
happy again.
Then you can brush my hair in the morning before I go to school
and daddy
can push me on the swing like we used to, right? We'll live
happily ever
after just like in the fairy tales you and daddy read to me at
night, won't
we? Won't we?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
*frown* I'm sorry. Really, I am. I just had to get this out. Good
night
everyone.
~Akiri