And He Doth Descended Into the Depths of Heaven
-Part Ten-
Kuriyamimizu

© The same as always

Okay, atashi-chan, I've done all the editing I could. If I missed anything, blame it on stylistics.
Jita
(My editor, all bow before her)

Kuri holds up a new sign: More Gundam Boy torture ahead, MUCH more shonen ai and tons of WEIRD SHIT!!!!

Umm….there’s a really big 1x2 scene in here….beware those leery of sex…

*DUO POV *

“SHINIGAMI HAS RETURNED FROM HELL!”

I smiled with predatory joy as I quickly and methodically mowed down the mobile suits in front of me. Nothing was a match for my Deathscythe, and I knew it well. I smiled down at all of the faceless people below me and spoke in a voice that wasn’t quite my own.

“I’m bigger than you, I’m faster than you, and you all know it. I take pleasure in killing you. I want you to know that and take the sound my voice with you straight TO HELL!”

Heero’s voice cut over the com, sounding slightly worried. “Duo, calm down! We have to get to the carriers.”

I punched back over, the same tone caught in my voice. I didn’t mean to show this side of me to him, but I couldn’t hold him back, that shadowy demon that lived in me.

“I have to finish killing them, Heero. Get to the carriers; I’ll be there in a minute.”

Heero missed the tone, or he didn’t care. The second option was very likely considering who he was. “It’s excess; move now or I move without you.”

I swung my mecha around to face him, my eyes locked into the exact place where he would be in the cockpit, sitting there and staring at me, annoyed and with a little bit of confusion, trying to figure out what I was trying to pull. I wanted to take my scythe and just kill him then; after that, then I wouldn’t have a reason to stay sane. I could let him come out and play, the shadowy boy that stayed far behind my eyes. I knew that if I let him out, then the whole world would feel him, the boy from hell.

Just as suddenly as the thought had occurred, I pushed it away violently. I liked Heero; I liked him much too much to kill him. As for everyone else, they deserved just as much of a chance to live as I did. (A chance that you were denied) the small voice in the back of my mind whispered sweetly.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

Without thinking I slammed me head into the nearest console, trying to banish the whispering voice that was telling me what lay in store. I didn’t want to hear him. I didn’t want to think about killing millions of people without a thought. And I didn’t want to think about killing Heero. The impact made my head ache, along with most of the rest of me. Overall, that had not been the smartest thing to do in the particular moment.

Heero came over the com again. “DUO! HAYAKU!”

I pushed the reply button, my voice back to normal by now. “C - coming!”

Heero had sounded very annoyed with me. I tried to shrug it off as mission anxiety for I’ve noticed that recently the missions have been getting to him. He’ll get all tense and nervous. When I listened carefully, I heard his breathing through the com; it sounded erratic. I didn’t have time to think about it; I had to move. With the push of a button and the consuming k about it; I had to move. With the push of a button and the consuming of a Tylenol, I was off.
 

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* Heero POV*

I glared at the screen, silently willing Duo to move from his position. Just a moment ago, I had heard him laughing maniacally, bringing about a firey death to all of the unfortunate mobile suits around him. This wasn’t idle mayhem as I had first thought we were going to cause. What Duo had done was gone ahead and slaughtered all of the soldiers in those suits; I couldn’t find the reasoning behind it, but if the tone of his voice was any indication it was very likely that I didn’t want to know the reasoning behind it. I just needed to get the mission done.

I couldn’t understand why my heart was pounding in my chest and why it was so hard to breath. It wasn’t particularly hot in the cockpit. The temperature was a few degrees lower than it usually was in fact. Yet still it felt like I was boiling alive. I’m seriously beginning to doubt my own sanity. Through the random thoughts skipping through my brain, something occurred to me. Back two months ago I had been ordered to ‘self-destruct’. With one of my trademark insane laughs, I realized something. For those two months, I had been slowly and methodically destroying myself; inwardly letting the feelings and emotions that I had always ignored, run free through my subconscious.

I smiled over at Fusei who finally made herself apparent. She was translucent and out of my way, but the look on her face was priceless in my opinion. It wasn’t the first time that I had seen someone worrying about me, but the extent that she seemed to be troubled brought laughter to my lips.

/What in the name of the thirteen hells is funny?/

I continued to laugh, still mechanically moving the controls in order to get to where I had been previously going. I was laughing so much and so hard that I was practically choking. When I found enough wind to speak, I did, directly what was on my mind.

“I just realized that I’ve been doing it all to myself.”

Fusei looked as if she were about to jump out of her skin. /WHAT? DOING WHAT?/

“Everything.” _____________________________________________________________________________________

When Fusei saw his eyes jump into their fixed, staring state, she realized that she wouldn’t be getting anything out of him anytime soon. The more that she thought about his words though, the more that she got the feeling that she was missing something very simple. She wondered idly if Alex were having any better luck with Duo.

Alex was literally beside herself. Duo was mechanically following Heero, directing Deathscythe.

She didn’t know what to do with her pilot. He seemed to be acting out of the ordinary. She paused, scrunched her face and then amended her thought. He was acting out of the ordinary even for him. When he had slammed his head into the panel she reached the point of concern.

/Duo?/

She smiled when he flicked his eyes instinctually finding her even thought his eyes couldn’t.

“What’s up chibi?”

/Worried about you./

“Don’t worry, I slam my head into stuff all the time./

/What’s that term you use? I think it’s---BULLSHIT!/

Duo let his gaze travel back to what he had originally been doing. His voice dropped several decibels. “I’m fine.”

Alex didn’t like his tone but it was his, I-don’t-want-argument tone. She sighed and fell silent. Duo let his eyes fall half closed and stared ahead of him blankly. Alex had never known prayer, nor reverence for anything holier than herself, and yet her hands folded together and she prayed as a devoted Christian might. _____________________________________________________________________________________

* DUO POV *

I stared blindly ahead of me, staring at Wing Zero and wondering somewhere in the back of my mind why Heero didn’t just go into bird mode and fly up that way, leaving me to my own devices. I supposed that he felt obligated to say with me because we were wingmen. That logic seemed to agree with my rather messed up brain. It’s all the rationale that I really needed.

Alex had been talking to me a moment ago, but I didn’t have the time to talk to her right then. I had to follow Heero, otherwise he would leave without me. A child-like fear of being left behind drove me forward. I could exist alone, but I much preferred the company of others.

I made it to the carrier and punched in the necessary codes to automatically attach. It was a carrier suited for all sorts of MS, and therefore Heero had chosen it. My rather fuzzy brain argued that there was only room for one Gundam on it and then it dawned on me. He would see that I made it up safely and then he would move into bird mode and go from there. That made even more sense.

Once we were moving I leaned back into the seat gingerly. From what I could see in one of the darkened screens, I was going to have one hell of a bruise where I had slammed my head into the panel. The more I thought about that particular decision the more I regretted it.

After the jarring entry into space I was feeling bad, just as a general. There wasn’t anything specific that I could point out. It would be fair to say that overall I felt like crap, and must have looked that way if the look that Alex was giving me was any indication. I let my head loll over to her general direction and caught her eyes.

“How bad does it look?”

She looked a little confused by my question and then noted the bruise. She came over with a flap of her wings and ran her tiny fingers over the spot. As a preliminary reaction I flinched, expecting discomfort, but felt none. It just felt as if she had touched me. When I looked over into the monitor that I’d been using as a mirror I saw that it was gone. With what I hoped looked like a curious glance I studied her. Before I could say anything she smiled and then spoke.

/It doesn’t look like anything to me. You have exactly a half an hour to nap. Do so now./

I couldn’t argue with her, for in truth I would need it. With a sigh that bordered on resignation I let my head slip into the cradle of my arms and I drifted off into a dark and peaceful sleep.

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Fusei stared silently at Heero. He was still hyperventilating; in the space of five minutes he’d gone from calm and methodical to almost panicked and stressed. With a tentative hand she reached out and tangled her fingers into his rather bushy mane of hair. He registered her touch with a flick of his eyes in her direction.

“What’s wrong?”

/That’s something that I should be asking you./

As he listened to his own shallow, uneven breaths Fusei saw realization dawn on his face.
 

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*Heero POV*

There is something wrong with me. Now that I take the time to think about it, there’s been something wrong with me for a long time. With a long sigh, I let myself fall back into the padding of my seat. Fusei is still standing with me. It’s an interesting thing to watch as she lays a hand in my hair and takes away some of the anxiety that’s coiling through my mind like a black serpent.

With a hand I barely realize that I’m lifting, I brush my bangs out of my face and stare out into the cold depths of space. Out there, that’s where I think I could truly be understood. Out there is where I couldn’t think or feel - and would have to do neither. Also out there is my koi: he, she, they, they’re out there somewhere.

/Don’t you realize that he’s about thirty feet away from you napping, Heero-kun?/

When I looked up at Fusei, she didn’t say anything. It was as if she hadn’t spoken at all, yet she had.

“Why are you talking about Duo?”

It was funny to see her jump the way that she did when I mentioned Duo. Silence was the only sound exchanged between us for a long time. She was looking off into the stars as if I had asked her the most complex question that she had ever received. It was a fairly straightforward question in my mind; however women tend to be weird. When she finally answered me, it was with one of her ever increasingly familiar cryptic statements.

/I wasn’t, I was. The boy you’re thinking of isn’t the same one that I’m thinking of./

I was in a bad mood and freely admit it. “What, do you expect him to grow batwings ? Were you expecting a scythe perhaps? Maybe he’ll start carrying around a scythe.”

/Heero…/

“WHAT?”

/Shhhh……/

Her voice was like a balm on my jangled nerves. Whatever anger had possessed me a moment ago let me free if it’s fingertips and let me slip back into my right mind. With a long sigh, I fell into the seat again.

/Heero, can I do something?/

I didn’t have the energy to turn my head so I locked my eyes on her instead. “What?”

/Let me hold you for a little while./

I didn’t know how to answer that one. I wasn’t sure that I particularly wanted to either, yet my instincts told me to say yes. In this matter, I trust my instincts.

“Hn.”

Fusei smiled. /Don’t worry about enemies. I’m your eyes right now; just rest your mind. If you don’t have a clear mindset, then you’re going to fuck up. That’s the last thing that we need, right?/

She had a logical point there that I couldn’t argue. I wasn’t sure what she was going to do, and I wasn’t about to move. She solved her own problem. She faded through the seat and faded up under me. It was the oddest feeling because my fingers were touching corporal material, the smooth feeling of silk. She pulled me to her and wrapped me up in her wings. I couldn’t see anything but white. All of the concerns that I had previously held slipped out of my mind like water trickling from a stream. I had time, right now I could sleep -
 

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Quatre was sitting out on Sandrock. Over in the corner, almost out of sight, Dorthy Catalonia sat, staring at him with the wide-eyed fascination of a child. Trowa was lurking somewhere around Heavyarms, tinkering with his old friend..  It was a time of relative tranquility in the wake of incidents in the kitchen.

 Two pairs of eyes came to be locked onto Wufei as he stepped into the room. He caught Dorthy and Trowa’s eyes with an expressive quirk of his eyebrows, silently asking what they were looking at. Trowa said nothing at all and dismissed Wufei with a quick shake of his head. Dorthy just laughed and blinked, breaking the lock of eyes that she had instigated.

 Wufei sauntered over and looked over at Dorthy, silently asking what she and Trowa were looking for.

/Wufei, it’s really not my place to say. I’m just here to watch Quatre and make sure that--/

 Wufei was thrown out of his mental conversation with Dorthy as she climbed up the leg of his Gundam faster than he would have given her credit for. His breath caught in his throat as she grabbed the small Arab around the waist and hauled him off, causing them both to free fall.

“ARE YOU INSANE?” Wufei found himself screaming, too confused to do anything more than stand where he was.

 Apparently Trowa was in on whatever had possessed Dorthy, because he had hit the gravity controls in the hangar just a moment before they would have hit. Everyone and everything  was floating now. Wrenches and bolts along with just about everything else hovered in no semblance of order slightly above the ground. Dorthy was hovering as well, her back to the floor and Quatre curled up in her arms at her front.

 Many times before Wufei had questioned the necessity of having a gravity control in the hangar. The main purpose that it had been rigged there was to assist the pilots in moving the parts of their mechas that they couldn’t otherwise move. Now he wanted to know what was going on.

“CATALONIA! WHAT IN HELL POSSESSED YOU TO DO THAT?!”

 Dorthy released Quatre and looked at Wufei rather cynically. “Get clear of Sandrock.”

 Wufei looked up at the Gundam. “I am.”

“In the doorway Chang!”

 Wufei was going to argue, but wanted to see if the eccentric blonde could prove her own point.

“Your show woman.”

 Dorthy looked over to Trowa. The tall pilot, who was still over in by the control annex, nodded once and then punched the button. For a fraction of a second nothing happened and Wufei snorted. Beside falling things that had suddenly floated from their proper places nothing happened. And then he heard the tell tale groans and creaks of metal. As he watched a large piece of Sandrock’s armor fell and hit the exact place that Quatre had been standing but minutes before.

 Wufei blinked back his shock and tried to collect his thoughts. His voice came, rather unbidden, from his throat.

“H-how did you know?”

 Dorthy grinned a fierce smile. “Women’s intuition?”

 Wufei shook his head, annoyed at the lack of a solid answer fro the girl. He turned, hoping for an answer from Trowa. The other boy with the emerald eyes just shrugged, smiling.

 Wufei growled, fire in his eyes. At the touch of a hand he calmed. Sakura was telling him to stay calm, and if that’s what she needed him to be, then he would be calm. As he took a couple of deep breaths he noted Quatre looking at him. With a half smile and the raising of a single eyebrow he silently asked what was on the other’s mind.

 Quatre smiled his rather childish smile and spoke, breaking the silence that had filled the hangar for the last five minutes or so.

“I figure you know what’s going on by now ne Wufei?”

 Out of curiosities’ sake Wufei ventured to wonder why Quatre assumed such a thing. “Just for the hell of it, answer me this Quatre; why do you assume that I know what you’re talking about?”

 Quatre smiled, looking at him with eyes that weren’t his own. “I see the dragon in you Cheng Wufei, I see the angel at your side and I see what’s going through your mind right now. You were informed of your place in this a little while ago and you haven’t quite found your complete understanding of the destiny that has befallen you.”

 Wufei was unaware that he had backed up a step in response to what Quatre had become. He wasn’t the little blonde pilot that Wufei knew and trusted as his comrade. This was someone much older than he; a boy with cold eyes and a voice that pierced the very core of one’s soul. This was someone that he had met before.

“Quatre---“

 The little boy smiled, all the warmth returning to his eyes. “The simple explanation for Dorthy and Trowa to be watching me so carefully is that I have a demon or two hunting me and trying to kill me. You’d be well advised to watch yourself as well.”

 Wufei was more than confused now. “But how do you know Quatre?”

 The little boy got the distant look in his eyes again. He stared into the distance without really seeing anything at all. “The answer is, ryu, that I was there the first time.”

 Wufei had never heard Quatre sound so tired. It wasn’t his place to say or do anything. He still didn’t completely grasp the entirety of the situation, however, he knew that there was much more to come.

 Dorthy broke the silence again. “I believe that you were originally here to fix Shen-Long were you not?”

 Wufei acknowledged her with a curt nod.

“Then, ryu;  I believe that your destination is over there.”  Wufei’s line of sight followed Dorthy’s pale finger over to his Gundam. He nodded once again and walked over to Nataku, in a metal incarnation.
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*DUO POV*

 I stirred from a sleep filled with restless dreams with a hallow groan. Alex was sitting near me, observing me as a cat might observe a bit of prey.  She seemed to have been watching me the whole time I slept.

 A quick glance over at the clock on one of the many panels of Deathscythe informed me that I woke up about five more minutes than I was supposed to. On reflection I couldn’t figure what had thrown me out of the dream that I had been walking through but a few moments before. It had been a nightmare of some sort, of that I was certain; I could remember looking into my own eyes and being terrified of what I saw there. The details eluded my conscious mind. After a few moments of trying to remember the fleeting scraps of the dream I gave up.

 Alex smiled at me, her long wings unfurling themselves in the rather cramped space of the cabin. I noted with some interest that she seemed to have matured since I had first known her. She looked to be about six now. I giggled despite myself when I watched her wings fade into the consoles around her as she stretched them.

“Doesn’t that tingle?”
 

/What? My wings?/

“Yeah.”

/Actually, it only tingles when I move through electrical equipment. Deathscythe doesn’t bother me much. Did you know that your Gundam is fairly sentient?/

 I blinked at that comment. I hadn’t expected anything of the sort. “Hadn’t thought about that too much actually.”

 She smiled pleasantly. /Yeah, I don’t lie, it is./

 She stiffened, her eyes fixed straight into the distance. /Here they come!/

 When I looked onto the radar she was right. There was a group of people coming at us. I wondered whether Heero was ready or not. When his calm, collected voice came over the com I knew it was going to be a hell of a fight.

“Duo get ready!”

“Gotcha! LET’S ROCK!”

 I’ll admit to a certain fierce joy at being able to blow shit up, and that joy was coursing through my veins right now, making the situation all the richer. The airless explosions were sights unto themselves, and for just a second I let the shadowy boy saw what I saw, and we agreed in the fierce beauty of the scene.

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 Quatre woke up, his head aching. He’d been napping and the other him had taken over. The other him was trying to tell him something, but he didn’t understand. He looked over at the clock and his eyes widened. Heero and Duo should have been back hours ago. Outside the darkness was beginning to settle completely over the area, and everything was shrouded in shadow. He hoped that everything was going all right. He rose from bed with silent grace, the sheets slipping from about his waist where they had pooled. At his right Trowa stirred, bringing a hand up to brush the bangs out of his face. He winked at Quatre when the little blonde looked at him questioningly.

“Just making sure you’re all right.”

 The Arabian smiled at his koi’s low, seductive voice sounding even better in whispered tones.

“I’m fine koibito, I’m going to get a glass of water, go to sleep.”

 He walked into the bathroom and poured himself a glass of water. Once he had downed it he regressed to his previous place. When he looked to Trowa he wasn’t surprised that the other hadn’t gone back to sleep.

“I thought I told you, you ought to go back to sleep.”

 He couldn’t see, so much as he felt that Trowa smiled. “How can I when there’s something so beautiful as you out of my arms’ reach? I don’t think that I could fall asleep without you in my arms Quatre.”
 

 That was possibly the sweetest thing that Quatre had ever had said to him. He slipped back under the sheets and into Trowa’s arms, reaching up and giving the other a hungry kiss before settling his head under Trowa’s chin, a small smile plastered onto his lips.

“I feel safe with you Trowa. I know I can sleep, but you’d better too.”

 He almost laughed as a small snore permeated the air around him and filled the silence which often slipped into their room, making it seem as if they were sleeping in the very grasp of eternity itself.

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 Sakura sat with her legs tucked under her, her large, exquisite eyes reflecting the light of the moon shining outside. Her long dark hair floated around her like a cloak of midnight and a slight frown rested on her ruby-red lips. Her wings were folded casually, easily unfurled at a moment’s notice. Something didn’t compute in her mind, perhaps it was the small quandary that she faced at the moment.

 Sleeping, his fairly long hair unbound and flowing about his head in a dark halo; his features tucked into peace and oblivion; his body accentuated by a sheet and light comforter was Wufei. She had watched the boy that was in front of her for years. She had cared for him so much that she had thrown her whole heart and soul into it. She suffered when he did, and rejoiced when life turned him a good hand. It was the unconditional love of a guardian angel that every guardian gave to they who were protected. What she didn’t understand was, when it had turned into love.

 It was the forbidden act that got angels cast down to much lower positions or reassigned to someone completely new. She couldn’t love he who she protected, simply because she wouldn’t be thinking in rational terms. Instead of sometimes dealing him a hard hand, she would opt to give him the easy way out, not wanting to see him suffer, but ultimately hurting him, because he wouldn’t learn the lessons that he had to. She couldn’t fall in love with him, because she cared too much about him.

 For the time that he had been living in this house, it had taken everything in her power to keep from curling up next to him while he slept and solidifying so that she could hold him for a few precious hours until she surrendered him to daylight once again.

 She had been tempted so often that she was almost tempted to turn herself in. However, she couldn’t do that. She couldn’t willingly rob herself of that which was in front of her. Things were going to change so soon that she couldn’t abandon him now. He trusted her, and it would be wrong of her to leave him.

 As she turned once again to gaze upon her sleeping angel she watched in fascination as a small smile crept stealthily onto his features. She watched his lips begin to move as if he were about to say something. Then he spoke.

“Sakura.”

 She didn’t realize that she had fallen forward silently onto the bed. She didn’t think as she solidified and wrapped her arms and wings about him, enfolding him in her simple presence.

“Damn you Wufei Chang. I can’t help it, you’ve taken my heart from me and I won’t allow you to give it back. I don’t care if you don’t know that I’m here, I am, and I’m going to continue to be here.”

 Her heart leapt as he rolled over and folded his arms loosely about her, as if it were the most natural thing in the world for him to do. They fell into the black of sleep together that way, as lovers ought.

*Heero POV*

“Omae o korosu, you son of a bitch!”

“Heero, this idea really sucked. We should have gone back and waited for back up.”

“Screw the back up!”

“There are too many of them! You’re going to get us killed!”

“No one lives forever!”

 I admit that I didn’t know what I was doing or saying as I replied to Duo’s repeated attempts to retreat. We had neutralized the target hours ago. The original timeline provided for us had been accurate and we would have been back for dinner, that is to say, if I had let us.

 After we had gotten to the target there had been a squad in retreat. If Duo hadn’t said anything then we would be at home now, asleep or on the way there. However, Duo had piped up, cheerfully noting that they had a backup squadron in the gray area of just beyond the boundaries of the mission. The damn Shinigami and his sensors. His little outburst had triggered something in me, something dark that I didn’t like. It was the part of me that I had been trying to banish, before I asked him out.

 At that thought I stopped and stared ahead of myself blankly, the rasping sound of my own breath in my ears. Odd thoughts will tend to come at odd times, but the mother of all odd thoughts just popped to the forefront of my attention. I had been thinking of asking Duo out for a couple of months now, ever since we had moved into the house with the others. I had been trying to improve myself subtly, trying to make myself into a man, that –I- deemed worthy of him. From his body language, and some of the things that he’d said in his sleep I’m entirely positive that he’s about ready to rape me in my sleep if one of us doesn’t make a decision sometime soon. What I’d let slip out to face the world right now was –not- what I wanted for Duo.

 Someone slapped me hard. I looked up to see Fusei’s haggard and worn face, angrily staring me down with no sign of flinching.

/What in the name of the thirteen hells are you doing? There’s a –battle- occurring outside for your information. Shape up or ship out! I’ll take control of Wing if you don’t do something./

“H-hai.”

 I pride myself in bowing to no one, however, one look at my guardian angel warned me not to mess with her. I hoped that Duo would hold out for another few moments, because I had fought myself into a proverbial corner.
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*DUO POV*

 With a frenzied arc I swung the scythe out blindly, trying to get the swarm of littler suits off of me. I couldn’t take being clustered anymore. All through my life I’ve always been slightly claustrophobic, but right now I was about ready to jump out of my skin. I needed to get out of this enviroment completely and very quickly. I didn’t care about the mission, I didn’t care if G yelled at me. I didn’t care about anything in that moment save getting out of there and to somewhere where I could curl up into a fetal position and stay that way for a good long time; until the relentless agony that washed over me would recede.

 With eyes that I was positive looked like those of a wile animals I spoke without thinking, grabbing blindly at the gun at my hip and missing completely because my hands were shaking so badly.

“Alex, oh God Alex, where are you?”

 I didn’t know why she didn’t come when I called her at first. I think she probably had guessed my intentions by that time.

“I know you’re there!!”

 She faded in, reluctantly, her purple eyes pleading with me.

/What?/

 With a trembling hand I held up the gun, watching with wry amusement as it shook all over the place. Never to my knowledge had I ever been quite this desperate.

“Shoot me now.”

 Her eyes widened to the size of the teacup saucers that Quatre insisted on keeping in the cabinets and which I had almost broke when I was washing dishes the other evening.

/What?/

“Shoot me please.”  I couldn’t believe how whiny and pleading my voice actually sounded to my own ears.

/no…/

“Please!?”

 I couldn’t say what happened next. I saw the hurt in her eyes and then the next thing I knew I was facedown on the console; my eyelids slowly dropping. I smiled slowly to myself, thinking maybe she had gone ahead and killed me and that I would never be waking up again. My only regret there would be that I couldn’t see Heero one more time. A niggling little voice in the back of my head told me that I was severely mistaken.

(Just wait Duo, my time is coming yet.)

 Before I fell into the haze I heard my own choked words. “You won’t have Heero. I already do.”

-End Part Ten

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