Stupidity Moon

Mimet Fucks up

Dr. Mad Scientist: Oh Lord of Silence, I am sorry. I suck. You are much better than me.

Speakers (Because the Lord of Silence can’t talk. Ha. Ha. What kind of stupid idea is this?): Get me more heart crystals so I can become strong as I once was!

Dr. Mad Scientist: As you wish, my lord. I have a team of specialists working on it.

Speakers: Is that supposed to impress me? You haven’t had much luck so far.

Dr. Mad Scientist: Don’t worry, I’ll succeed this time! I’m sure!

Speakers: Whatever. Just get out of here. I want to play with my new stuffed Asuka doll. Isn’t she sooooooo kawaii?

Dr. Mad Scientist: Uh, yeah. Very. I’ll be going now.

* * * * * * *

Mimet (singing): I can’t sing! But I’m trying anyway! I really suck and I don’t remember the words! La la la la!

* * * * * * *

TV: SomeRandomSinger has a huge hit album! His fans, who call themselves SomeRandomSinger fans, really like him! SomeRandomSinger will be having auditions for young women who want to co-star in his movie! Come to SomeRandomPlace to try out!

Lita: What kinda name is "SomeRandomSinger fans"? Couldn’t they do better than that?

Rei: We’re not exactly in a position to criticize, considering our fans are called "moonies."

Serena: Hey, I sorta like that name.

Rei: That’s because they’re named after you.

Amy: Why were we watching TV when we should have been studying?

Mina: Ohhhh, he’s sooooo cute! I’m going to try out! I want him to be my boyfriend! I’m in love!

Rei: That’s why. She wouldn’t let us turn it off. She’s getting a little crazy about this guy.

Artemis: That might not be such a good idea-

Mina: I’m going to try out right away! Bye!

Lita: Shouldn’t we tell her that the auditions don’t start for another two days?

All others: Nah.

* * * * * * *

Dr. Mad Scientist: What’s our next target, Mimet??

Mimet: It’s this guy! SomeRandomSinger! Even though I’m his biggest fan, I’ll try to kill him and get his pure heart!

Dr. Mad Scientist: **sigh** Alright, pick up the heartsnatcher tomorrow. It’s a really good one. Because I’m a genius! HAHAHA! No, wait a minute. How come every target is a handsome young guy?

Mimet: Because, those are the guys I like to look at! They’re very pure. Also, since one of the Sailors have to have a semi-romantic relationship with him, I can’t exactly pick a girl, can I?

Dr. Mad Scientist: I’m not sure those are very good reasons…

Mimet: I’m so sorry. **crying** I’m so bad… I’m always wrong…

Dr. Mad Scientist: Uh… It’s ok… um, just do your thing. I’m sorry for, uh, whatever I did.

Mimet: Really? Thank you so much! **Hugs Dr. Mad Scientist** You’re sooooo cool!

Mimet skips away and closes the door.

Mimet: Sucker.

* * * * * * *

Mina: Hey, receptionist, where is SomeRandomSinger?

Receptionist: He won’t be here until tomorrow.

Mina: Damn, now I have to wait until tomorrow to grab him! Hey, who’s that?

Mimet: Hey, who’s that?

Mina and Mimet: Grrrrrrr…

Mina: Hey, your shirt is from his first concert!

Mimet: Wow, so is yours!

Mina: My name’s Mina! What’s yours?

Mimet: Mimet-er, Mimi! Yeah, Mimi!

Mina: Normally I’d wish you good luck, but since only one of us can win… BURN IN HELL BITCH!

Mimet: YOU TOO! I WILL WIN THIS CONTEST

Rei: Guys, cut down on the caps! Geeze, no consideration for those off set…

* * * * * * *

Mina (during interview): Aren’t I cute? Heehee.

Judge: Can you do a romantic scene with SomeRandomSinger?

Mina: Uh, HELLO! I’m a fangirl! I fantasize about doing something like that!

Judge: That might not be a very good question… Alright, next.

Mimet: Uh… Um…

Judge: What’s your name?

Mimet: Uh…Ah…Um…Uh…

Judge: It’s a simple question.

Mimet: Ah…Um…Uh…Um…

Judge: Where do we find these people?

Mina: At least there won’t be any competition from HER.

* * * * * * *

Announcer: The winners are: Somgirl1, Somegirl2, Somegirl3, Mina and Mimet-, I mean Mimi!

Mimet: God, even she slips up on my name… Good thing those Sailors are too stupid to put it together.

Mina: Hey, how did you get in? You acted like a total idiot!

Mimet: Bribe money. It can get you anywhere.

Mina: Grrrrr…

* * * * * * *

Mina: We’re finally at the finals, but where is SomeRandomSinger?

SomeRandomSinger: Here I am! I’m here to wish all of you good luck!

Mina: I’d better wait until after the show to grab SomeRandomSinger. Otherwise some other fan might beat me too him…I don’t think I could hold off a whole mob…

SomeRandomSinger: The person who scores over 80% of the fan vote will win! Now, Somegirl1 Goes first.

Mina and Mimet backstage: Grrrr…

Mina: You’ll never win, Mimet-, I mean Mimi.

Mimet: I’ll kill him before I’ll let you have him!

Mina: You wouldn’t go that far!

Mimet: Hell yeah I would.

Mina: I’ll kill you first! Grrrr…

SomeStageGuy: Hey, Mina, you’re next.

Mina: OK! **walks onstage** My name is Mina, and if you vote for me I’ll make a global tax cut using the nation’s surplus. It may cut as much as 5% off everyone’s income tax for the year! Thank you!

StupidWheelofVotes™ gives her a 70%.

Announcer: Awww, so close! Too bad you suck…

Mina: Damn. Now how will I get SomeRandomSinger?

(backstage)

Serena: Wow, you got really close Mina!

Rei: You probably would have won, but nothing in this series can carry over to the next episode. Sorry!

(onstage, the StupidWheelofVotes™ is doing Mimet-, I mean Mimi)

70…75…85! No wait, it goes back to 75.

Announcer: Almost! Very close, but you suck Mimi. Looks like we’ll have to find someone else…

Mimet: Ha! I’m not here to win this contest! I’m here to KILL SOMERANDOMSINGER! HAHAHA!

Mina: No! She was serious!

Mimet: I’m from the Bureau of Bad Behavior! So die!

Rei: That’s it! Writer!

YES?

Rei: You have to be kidding me! I know you forget their names a lot, but "Bureau of Bad Behavior"? That is so lame! It’s even worse than "Moon Kingdom"!

UM, REI, THAT’S THE REAL NAME. I DIDN’T MAKE IT UP. I SWEAR.

Rei: Good god! No wonder they’re so screwed up! What kind of idiots have names like that?

Mimet Transforms and unleashes the heartsnatcher.

Sailor Moon Transformation!

Sailor Mercury Transformation!

Sailor Mars Transformation!

Sailor Jupiter Transformation!

Sailor Venus Transformation!

Mars: Alright, what’s the heartsnatcher going to be this time? I say microphone.

Moon: As much as I hate to agree with Rei, I’ll have to say microphone.

Jupiter: I think speakers. But still pretty close.

Mercury: I’ll have to go with speakers. Very close though.

Venus: I think it’ll be a cute guy!

All: **sigh**

The smoke clears, revealing a microphone heartsnatcher!

Mars: I was right!

Moon: So was I! Haha!

Mars: Just because you copied me.

Mimet: Go, heartsnatcher! Kill them!

Micky: I have to warm up first. My voice is a very delicate tool. Do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-do!

Moon: Can I just blast her now?

Mars: Why not? Go ahead.

Super Chalice Cup Transformation!

SUPER RAINBOW SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- SPINNY- HEART ATTACK!

Micky: Alright, now I’m ready. Uh oh. Shit.

Heartsnatcher dies.

Moon: Go me! Yeah! I rock!

Rei: That was difficult. Good thing she wasn’t attacking you or anything. Then you would have really been in trouble.

Up on the balcony:

Uranus: What do they want the pure heart crystals for?

Pluto: They have found the Lord of Silence and need the crystals to restore his power.

Neptune: How do you know that?

Pluto: I don’t. I’m guessing.

Uranus: Amazing how your guess is so perfectly correct.

Pluto: I’m good at guesses. Plus I’m psycic.

Uranus: Really?

Pluto: No, but it sounds cool, right?