SAFE, SANE, AND CONSENSUAL DEFINED (By LordSunray) The universally accepted credo of this lifestyle is Safe, Sane, and Consensual. Safe in that the activities participated in do not involve the risk of serious or permanent injury. An injury is an unwanted or unhealthy modification to one's person or state of mind. (Tattoo's, scarification, and piercings being viewed as intentional decoration rather than permanent damage...when done properly.) Sane in that the activities are intended to result in the mutual pleasure of both parties and are not intended to result in the rapacious pillage of another's body, emotions and/or mind for the sole gratification of one party at the expense of the other. Sane play requires that the Dominant first be in complete control of himself or herself. The Dominant must then exercise the control given by the submissive at all times for the mutual benefit and pleasure of both parties. Losing sight of the very purpose that control was given to the Dominant by the submissive is exploitative and abusive. Consensual in that each party has knowingly and voluntarily agreed to the activities engaged in and did not withdraw that consent. (Honesty is a prerequisite to knowing consent. Deception and manipulation render consent unknowing and involuntary).
BDSM Play Checklist BDSM Partner Checklist Below is a list of D/s activities that you may find helpful in guiding your erotic activities. The list can be used as follows: •- Answer YES or NO next to each item to indicate if you have ever DONE that activity. •- Indicate for each item how you FEEL about that activity by rating it on a scale of 0 to 5 or as a NO. NO means you will NOT do that item under any circumstances. A zero indicates you have no desire to do that activity (in fact, may loath it) but you are willing to do it to please the Dominant. 5 means the activity is a wild turn-on, with the other numbers indicating some level in between those two. Activity Yes No 0-5 Abrasion Anal sex Arm & leg sleeves Beating soft Beating hard Being Blindfolded Being gagged Being serviced (sex) Biting Breast bondage Branding Boot worship Bondage - light Bondage - heavy Breast whipping Caning Chaueffering Chosen food for Chosen clothing for Clothespins Cock worship Collars (wearing) Corsets (wearing) Cuffs (metal) Dilation Double penetration Electricity Enemas Examinations (physical) Exhibitionism Face slapping Fantasy rape Fantasy gang rape Fisting Following orders Foot worship Forced dressing Forced homosexuality Forced masturbation Forced nudity Forced servitude Full head hoods Genital sex Given away Golden showers Hairbrushes Hair pulling Hand jobs - getting Hand jobs - giving Harnessing Head - giving Head - getting High heel worship Homage with tongue Hot waxing Housework Human puppy dog Humiliation in private Humiliation in public Ice cubes Including others Infantalism Intricate rope bondage Interrogations Kidnapping Kneeling Leather restraints Lecturing Licking Massage - getting Massage - giving Medical scenes Mouth bits Nipple clamps Nipple weights Oral/anal play Over-the-knee spanking Orgasm denial Orgasm control Phone sex Piercing (temp) Piercing (perm) Pussy whipping Pussy worship Riding crops Religious scenes Saran wrapping Scratching - getting Scratching - giving Serving as a pony Serving as a maid Sensory deprivation Serving Serving as furniture Serving orally Sexual deprivation Shaving Spanking Speculums (Anal) Speculums (vaginal) Spreader bars Stocks Straight jackets Strap-on-dildos Strapping - full body Suspension Supplying victims Suspension (inverted) Swapping Swinging Tape gags Tattooing Teasing Tickling Triple penetration Uniforms Verbal humiliation Videoed scenes Voyeurism Whipping Wrestling
