...and now, back to PENGUIN$

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Downtown Toronto

Anita swung the car to a screeching halt in the parking lot of a Thrifty Car
Rental and shut the engine off, leaving the vehicle quiet as a tomb.
Valeria sat in the seat beside her, arms crossed and waiting for her
companion to say something. So far she'd been waiting since they'd left the
factory. Anita had listened silently to Valeria's theory on Pisces and his
involvement with the penguins as she drove, her face an odd mask of grim
determination.

After patiently watching this display of self-righteous nobility for some
time, Valeria had come to the realization that Anita had automatically
shouldered the full responsibility for the events of the past few hours.
She'd taken charge in a manner that implied that she felt that things had
been mismanaged by incompetents. It didn't sit well with Valeria, but she'd
opted to stay quiet on the issue. This was not the time to bring it up.
Besides, Valeria mused, Blake's actions seemed to have less to do with the
here and now and more to do about guilt over past things. Something had
driven this young woman around the bend recently, and it had nothing to do
with this Raina-Munin thing. Sometimes, the conscience was mightier than the
sword.

To avoid being seen unloading enough fire power to invade a small country,
Valeria had decided to have Anita park in the rental car lot across from the
side entrance to stately old Union Station on Front Street, less than a city
block from Cathedral Tower.

"Okay Orbus," Anita said, taking a deep breath after a long moment of
silence. "It's your town. Lead the way."

"Exactly what are you planning on carrying in there?" Valeria asked, feeling
uneasy. "I, uh, see you've brought quite the arsenal with you."

"I admit I went a little overboard," Anita replied tightly, "but if your
hunch is right and things get bad, we may not have the time to come back
here. I want to be damn sure we've got what it takes to deal with this
bastard."

"We can do without the missiles, don't you think?" Valeria tried to sound
reasonable and not as apprehensive as she felt. Blake seemed to be preparing
for a blood bath.

Anita took a second to think about this. "Okay," she said. "No missiles, but
I'm not gonna be happy if I have to give up the flame thrower." She opened
the car door and stepped outside. Hearing the trunk open, Valeria shook her
head and rubbed her eyes before opening her own door.

Outside the rain had stopped, but the night air was still bone chillingly
cold. Anita had removed her jacket and was strapping on an inner pants
holster, slipping in a 9mm Firestar to keep the Browning Hi-Power company.
She reached down to check the weapon she had in an ankle holster and in the
process flashed silver throwing knives in black leather sheaths at her
wrists and the tip of something long and sharp running down her back. She
slung the mini-Uzi over one shoulder before carefully sliding the jacket
over top of it, hiding the tip of the weapon with her long, curly black
hair. There simply was no way to hide the flame-thrower, though. Muttering
an oath, she opted to leave it behind. Reaching into the trunk again she
brought out a long fish shaped object.

"I don't get it," she said. "What is it?"

"It's a fish shaped hand grenade," Valeria grinned. "We didn't want the
penguins throwing them back out at us anymore. Take a sniff, they're
scented. Neat, huh?"

Anita took a sniff and wrinkled her nose. "Ew."

Valeria pulled the H&K P9mm from it's shoulder holster and checked it before
replacing it. Sighing, she glanced over the remaining buffet of weaponry and
selected a 9mm Lugar automatic and stuffed it down the back of her jeans
along with a few extra clips

Anita smiled grimly. "Okay. Let's do this."

Valeria was more than hesitant to leave the shadowy cover of the parking
lot. "Blake, do you have even the smallest understanding of the situation
here? This is Canada. It's illegal to walk around with guns sticking out all
over you. I know this is the wee hours of the morning, but do you realize
what could happen if my hunch is wrong and we get hauled off by security?"
She paused as Anita broke into peals of laughter.

The petite necromancer leaned on the car, chuckling and wiping her eyes.
"Good one, Orbus," she said. "I didn't know you had it in you, but for a
second you really had me going there."

"I wasn't joking."

Anita glanced at her with sharp eyes, all the humor suddenly gone from her
face. "You're kidding me," She said, her voice completely dead-pan.

"Nope."

"What kind of country is this?!" Anita blazed. "How do you protect yourself
from the monsters?"

"Oh we don't need guns," Valeria smirked coyly, "As I said, this is Canada.
We have manners here. The monsters do too." She really was kidding now, but
decided she was having too much fun.

She knew that the sad reality was that even though the Canadian government
had come to officially acknowledge the threat of the bizarre global vampire
population explosion, they somehow hadn't made the connection between it and
the need for an individual citizen's right to self-protection. This hadn't
resulted in any massacres, but Valeria had been in the business long enough
to know that the homeless community had become one big larder for inner city
vampires. Bodies turned up regularly and the Metro police were helpless in
the knowledge that this would continue to be an ignored issue until a
newsworthy victim turned up.

"Unbelievable." Anita shook her head. "Well Orbus, it looks like we have
only one option left to us. Attitude. Just act natural and we'll be fine. We
just walk into that building like it's no one's business. Got that?"

"You've got solid brass.... um, ovaries, y'know that Blake?" Valeria
grinned. Realizing that time was a resource they were quickly running out
of, she agreed. "Okay, but try not to shoot anyone until it's absolutely
necessary."

"Have a little faith, Orbus."

Valeria sighed. They began to walk towards the street at the end of the
parking lot where the glow of the city bathed everything in a surreal golden
light. Above them loomed the CN Tower, the largest free standing tower in
the world.

This part of the city was deceptively quiet. Except for the soggy sleeping
bodies of the homeless that curled up on steaming sidewalk vents, it looked
sophisticated and spotless. Solitary cars passed occasionally on streets
soon destined to become clogged with rush hour traffic. Toronto The Good
never truly slept. Support functions labored, police prowled, hospitals
buzzed with activity. In the after-hour clubs people danced and filled their
stomachs with lethal substances. Dreary little coffee shops became tiny
havens of warmth and dispassionate civility.

The two women walked up Bay Street, past the stark black monoliths of the
Toronto-Dominion Center buildings and the gold glass walled Royal Bank
Tower. At the entrance to Cathedral Tower, Anita stopped beside a cluster of
battered newspaper boxes to gape, slack jawed.

"It's not hard to believe that we've become Hollywood North when we keep
putting up buildings like this," Valeria muttered absently. She was staring
at one of the news boxes which had been severely vandalized. Bashed and
battered, its papers were strewn across the sidewalk and blowing down the
empty street. Bending down she stared at the headline on one of the papers.
It read:

"Researchers in Antarctica Find Hole in Ozone Layer. Penguins Deny Any Wrong
Doing."

Whoever had trashed the box hadn't gotten the joke. She looked up at Blake.
"I think we're at the right place."

Anita just shook her head and stared at the soaring cathedral-like ceilings
strung with tiny lights that ran down a main mall the size of an aircraft
hangar. "It makes me want to cross myself before I walk in," She whispered,
suddenly realizing how long it had been since she'd set foot in a church.

Valeria grinned. "Come on," she said. "This could all be a bust if we can't
get past security. These buildings are card access only."

Inside, their sneakered feet made little squeaky sounds on the white marble
floors as they hurried past silent investment firms and banks. A large
fountain bubbled quietly.

As they walked, both women began to notice a strange phenomenon. To one side
an industrial sized bucket lay overturned, a mop lying beside it in a puddle
of soapy water. Further along, a slew of empty garbage bags littered the
floor next to an overflowing waste container. Two carts, laden with cleaning
supplies, sat side by side a short distance from a floor waxing machine,
humming quietly as it idled. A single, ladies serviceable black shoe rested
on its side.

There was not a person in sight.

"Looks like they take their coffee breaks seriously around here," Anita
quipped, her voice echoing. She bent down to pick up an abandoned walkman
from the floor and fiddled with it.

"There could be a completely logical explanation for this," Valeria said,
hands on her hips as she scanned the area. "But this is pretty weird." She
watched Anita fit the headphones on her head and press play.

"Blake?" She asked. "What're you doing?"

"ROOXXXXXAAAAANNNNNN! Yoouuuu doon't have tooo puttt onnn that redddddd
dressss!"

"How sweet," Valeria said wryly. "Correct me if I'm wrong here, but this is
a side of you most people don't get to see, and you've chosen to share it
with me now."

"Sorry," Anita said, clearing her throat and sheepishly putting the walkman
back on the floor. "I learned a thing or two about not taking life so
seriously and having a good time while I was dating Sigmund. Penguins know
how to party. I usually get this way when I'm around them, and I think it's
because of our shared link."

"Riiiiight," Valeria said and sighed. "The security desk is on the other
side of these elevators. We'll need to get a look at the pass book to see
what floor Pisces signed in for. We may be in trouble if the guard just
carded him in."

"I'll do it," Anita said, getting serious.

"No, I'll do it," Valeria growled back. "I'm less obviously armed. Security
guards tend to be fussy about things like that." Taking a deep breath and
putting on her best fake smile, she started around the bank of elevators
toward the security desk.

One look at the pudgy, middle aged man with dark hair, bushy mustache and
wrinkled uniform had her jumping back into Anita who was following closely
behind.

"Shit!" Valeria whispered, shutting her eyes tightly.

"What?" Anita asked. She quickly peered around the corner. "What's wrong?"

"I sort of know that guy," Valeria cringed, distaste dripping from her
hushed voice. "Of all the security guards in the world, I never expected him
to be here. This isn't going to be easy."

She shook her head and explained, "Back before the Penguin War I took all
kinds of jobs to pay the rent. One was office temping. I worked a late shift
in one of those big black towers we passed down the street. Dumb-ass used to
be a guard there. For some reason, this guy had me pegged as a trouble maker
from the day I started. He just really had it out for me."

"Ha!" Anita grinned. "He ain't seen nothing yet. Maybe I should do this."

"No," Valeria said firmly, getting a grip on herself. "I can do this."

Taking a deep breath she straightened her spine and with a nod in Anita's
direction the two approached the desk.

Security Officer Mike Dumass looked up from his newspaper and half eaten
bologna sandwich. Seeing Valeria, recognition flared across his ruddy
features and he pursed his lips tightly.

"Hi!" Valeria said with enough false enthusiasm to match her false smile.
She clasped her hands behind her back, trying to look innocent and sincere.

"Well, well. Ms. Orbus isn't it?" Dumass replied with feigned disinterest.
He continued to read his paper. "It's always a pleasure. Anything I can do
for you?"

Out of the corner of her eye, Valeria watched Anita lean casually on the
desk and toy with the curled page corners of the pass book while she quickly
read the entries. She looked up and mouthed the word 'one-two-five'. Valeria
nodded.  "Um, I'm really sorry to bug you, Officer Dumass, but I just
started working up on the 125th floor and I left my wallet and my pass card
up there. Can you let me up to get it?"

"That's Du-MASS, Ms. Orbus," the guard said with a grunt. "It's french." He
stood slowly and placed both chubby hands on the surface of the desk. "I'll
need to see some kind of alternate ID, like a paystub."

"You don't understand," Valeria replied a little more harshly than she'd
intended. "It's all in my wallet. I need my wallet. I can't get home without
it. My friend and I were out at a bar and I realized it was gone. We're
broke. How are we supposed to get..."

"That's not my problem," Dumass snapped and crossed meaty arms over his
bulging pot belly. "You should have considered that before you went and left
your wallet up there. How do I know you're not going up to rob Dr. Pisces
blind?"

"It would have been easier to just have shot him," Anita muttered under her
breath. "That IS still an option you know."

Valeria fought the temptation to agree. She decided to try a radical new
approach: The truth.

"Officer Du-MASS," she began, stepping a little closer, causing him to look
even more suspicious. "Okay. The truth is, I don't work up on the 125th
floor, but…" she held up a hand as Dumass flashed a triumphant, superior
smile, "…but, we have reason to believe that there is trouble up there that
could become a threat to the entire city."

"The entire city," Dumass said in mock seriousness. "Now you're getting
somewhere Orbus, can you describe this trouble so I know what to tell the
police?"

"Oh boy." Valeria let out a breath. She turned to glance back at Anita, but
the Necromancer gave her a look that told her she was on her own. She turned
back to Dumass.

"Well, Officer, let me ask you a question to answer that, um, have you by
any chance seen any...penguins, recently?"

"Penguins." Dumass stared a her a moment, then began to chuckle. "Penguins?
Oh surrre." He snorted. "Everywhere I go actually. Hell, the wife picked me
up these boxers just yesterday that..."

"No, no, no," Valeria interrupted, cringing at the image that entered her
mind. "I mean real living, breathing, waddling, little webbed-footed,
flightless waterfowl."

Dumass sighed. "Is this going anywhere, Ms.Orbus?"

Valeria took a deep breath. "Officer Dumass, we have reason to believe that
Penguins are the source of the trouble I was just speaking of."

"Forget shooting him, now all I wanna do is shoot you," Anita muttered,
rubbing her eyes as the security guard dissolved into a fit of hysterical
laughter.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...ahhhhhh...oh!..oh!...AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Laughed the guard, slapping his knees and falling back into the chair behind
him. Valeria looked on, feeling helpless. Behind her, Anita paced
restlessly. The situation was falling apart quickly.

Then something caught Anita's eye at the entrance. She tapped Valeria on the
shoulder to draw her attention away from the laughing guard.

A short figure had just stepped through the revolving door wearing a long,
gray trench coat with a turned up collar and a brown fedora pulled down low,
revealing only the tip of an impossibly hooked nose. The hat swung left and
right once furtively and then the figure began to propel itself forward in
an odd manner that was far to close to waddling for comfort.

The revolving door began to turn again revealing a second trench-coated
figure that was soon followed by another until there were six figures in
all. All six began to waddle in a row across the marble floor towards the
center bank of elevators. Officer Mike Dumass, still busting a gut, waved
them past without so much as asking for a single security card.

"Evening gentlemen!" He guffawed. "Seen any penguins?"

All six froze in mid-waddle and rotated their heads in unison in the guard's
direction first, and then towards the two women. Dumass laughed even harder.

"Why does this not look good to me Orbus?" Anita whispered. Both women
immediately turned themselves away from the newcomers, pretending to fiddle
with their clothes.

The six had resumed their trek to the elevators. A soft ding sounded, the
doors of the center car opened and the first figure stepped on.

Dumass shook his head and jerked a thumb in the direction of the newcomers.
"They don't talk much, but they sure know how to party." He wiped his eyes.
"Now, girls, I don't know what kind of joke you think you're playing here
but..."

At that moment the last of the figures paused before stepping onto the
elevator. It looked back at them just as Anita turned to get a better look.
For an instant her eyes met the gleaming black ones beneath the hat.

"Damn," she said, reaching to pull the gun out of her holster.

"Excuse me!" Dumass thundered. "Exactly what the hell do you think you're
doing?!"

"Heads up Orbus!" Anita yelled, assuming a firing stance and gripping her
gun.  The penguins had rushed back out of the elevator and were pulling
fully automatic machine guns from inside their coats. The air was suddenly
filled with noise and flying bullets.

Dumass stood rooted in shock until a spray of bullets winged past his nose,
nearly taking it off. He threw himself to the floor under his desk and made
himself very small.

The desk, a few plants and the odd piece of abstract art were the only
sources of shelter in the lobby. The two women were forced to became
constantly moving targets as they dodged the hailstorm of bullets and
returned fire. Anita had lost the option to stop and remove her coat to get
at the Uzi.

Valeria rolled to the ground to avoid a burst of gunfire and came up in time
to fire a well placed shot at one penguin. It went down in a shower of
bright blue blood, sending out a wailing shriek. She raised her gun again to
provide Anita with some cover and realized that the clip was empty.
Crouching low, she scurried towards the desk with bullets slamming into the
marble tiled wall behind her. In his blind fear, Officer Dumass kicked at
her and wailed high in his throat. She ignored him as she pulled herself in
under the desk, deftly reaching for another clip and smacking it home. Then
she grabbed his face to still him.

"Mike!" She yelled. "We need to get out of here! Where's the nearest exit?!"

He began to stutter something and point.

"Excuse me for a moment," Valeria said, releasing him and launching herself
up over the desk to cover Anita who had taken another bird down and had set
her sights on one of the birds in particular. Valeria fired several times
before turning her attention back to the frightened guard.

"Th-the d-door to the st-stairwell," Dumass said, clutching a pass card in
his hand.

Valeria glanced back. "Okay. I'll cover you," she said. "Get your ass to
that door, open it, and hold it open. Wait for us."

"A little less conversation and a little more shooting, Orbus," Anita
yelled, throwing herself up against the plate glass walls to avoid a barrage
of shots, then pushing herself off and out of the way seconds before more
shots shattered the glass in her wake. The remaining four penguins were
advancing in a line, firing from directly in front of the revolving doors,
making escape impossible.

Dumass' legs had turned to jelly, but his mind was beginning to focus again.
He tried to steel himself and not think about the fact that two young women
armed with semiautomatics were saving his bacon. He reached the door and
slid the card through the reader. The light stayed an annoying red. Dumass
grunted and banged his head on the door as he tried again, pleading with it
to work. This time the light turned green and the door opened.

Seeing this, Valeria yelled: "Blake! There's an open door behind you and to
your left! MOVE!"

Anita looked back at the open door and, with a frustrated yell, turned and
headed for it at a full out run, ducking bullets all the way. She estimated
that she had one shot left. Valeria reached the door before her and threw
herself through it, but just before Anita reached it she stopped and turned.

She forced her mind to clear and took aim.

"Good-bye, Trebor," she said quietly and fired. The bullet mercifully did
her bidding. It flew through the air, striking the penguin. She watched in
morbid fascination as his chest blossomed into slick blueness, then an arm
snaked around the door and pulled her inside.

"Are all people from St. Louis this damn stupid?" Valeria glared at her,
"What were you trying to do, get yourself killed?" She gave Anita a
half-hearted shove, more intended to try and prove to herself that the other
woman was really there and not lying dead in the lobby.

"Th-that, was Trebor," Anita panted, ignoring her. "He used to be Sigmund's
second in command. He never liked me. I think he knows that I killed
Sigmund."

"Well, now he's dead too," Valeria breathed. She and Anita turned to look at
the wheezing guard just as a hail of bullets blasted into the door leaving
deep indents in the metal and causing all three to jump.

"Armor plated," Dumass said after a moment, grinning weakly. He pointed at
the stairs that lead downward. "There's a door to the parking garage just
one flight down. I think we should use it and find a way to call the cops."

"You're handling this very well for someone who was laughing his ass off at
us a moment ago," Valeria said. "Now do you see what kind of threat penguins
pose to us?" She reached for the cellular phone that was normally clipped to
her belt. Finding it missing, she squeezed her eyes shut in frustration and
uttered a muffled oath. Nothing was working out right today. She'd just have
to live with that.

"What penguins?" Dumass was ranting, angry denial all over his face. "I
didn't see no damn penguins. I didn't see nothing except six guys with big
guns."

"Whatever," Anita said, "Let's just get out of here."

They started down the stairs, but after a few steps Anita collapsed without
warning, clutching at her head.

"Anita, what's wrong? Are you hit?" Valeria leaned over to pull open Anita's
jacket to check for damage.

"No," Anita replied, "Shut up! They're talking to me." She bent over and put
her head on her knees, rocking gently.

"Penguin-foo?" Valeria kneeled before her, hands on Anita's shoulders.
"Fight it Blake!"

Anita looked up. "No...MY penguins! Valeria, you were right. They ARE here!
We have to go up. They say that going down is dangerous. You just have to
trust me on this. We have to start climbing."

"Screw that!" Dumass yelled. "What is she, insane or something? Let's get
out of here!"

"Okay," Valeria said to Anita, "we climb." She helped Anita to her feet and
steadied her. "You up to climbing one hundred and twenty five floors?"

"Watch me," Anita said and started up the stairwell two steps at a time.
Valeria followed behind.

"You're both nuts!" Dumass yelled after them, then jumped as something
slammed into the door hard enough to cause a large dent in the bullet proof
metal. He heard an eerie, mournful wailing coming from the other side and
suddenly realized that he was very alone and very unarmed.

"Damn," he said under his breath.

He ran down the stairs and wrenched open the door to the parking garage.

Continued in  Issue 7  of PENGUIN$...

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