This article is incomplete.  Sorry.  Look for future updates, well, in the future.

This section was one of my favorites to write.  It was more or less related to my job, and so I had a lot of data to work with and personal experience to draw from.  Did I actually go out to eat at all of these restaurants?  No, not really.  But if I gave a place a favorable review than you can be sure that I actually did eat there.

And, if you are interested, I also have some info on my evil clue idea and on the Matt's escape clue idea.

One note on the format:  Throughout the manual, I tried to maintain the overall impression that the OHDaMN was edited someone else, or by the team as a whole.  In this and other articles where I had to present material that was largely my own, I used an "outside" viewpoint and tried not the take direct credit for any of it.  Hopefully this worked will enough on game day, but I must admit now it sometimes makes me sound like an egotistical slob.  I hope you can forgive me the sin of continually referring to myself in the third person.

Where to Eat

Your Guide to the Listings:

The restaurant name is listed first in bold type.
Location:  the street address, sometimes with some additional helpful directions
Cost:  we have a four point scale:  Cheap, Manageable, Pricey, and Too Much.  The costs as listed refer to value as much as to actual prices charged.

Cheap -- from under $10 up to $12 or so.

Manageable -- from $12 to $20, or even up to $25 with beer.

Pricey -- expect to pay at leas $30

Too Much -- pricey, but not worth the money.

Additional note on cost:  Matt will usually have at least one beer with dinner or lunch, particularly when he is going out to a restaurant, and that extra expense is usually figured into the costs as listed.

Dress:  required attire for entering the joint.
Best time to visit is:  a suggestion on what time of day or special occasion best fits this location.
Absolute coolest feature is:  What you'd be sure to tell your friends about if you were describing the place to them.
Description:  ...would be a description of the bar or restaurant in question.
Matt's recommendation is:  a brief note from Matt, telling you either what he would probably order, or his suggestions on what is good at this location.
Update:  Updates are included for some of teh listings, where some major factor has come into play in the past year or so since the original listing was written.  (Bar closings, name changes, that kind of thing)

Atlanta Fish Market
Location:  265 Pharr Road
Cost:  Pricey
Dress:  Casual, but dressy.  (Put on a clean collared shirt, guys)
Best time to visit is:  There is no good time.  It is always packed to the gills.
Absolute coolest feature is:  The Big Fish.  It's a real big fish, though not a Reel Big Fish.
Description:  You have relatives coming in from ou of town, and want a nice place to go and eat dinner.  This would be the place to go.  Hopefully you haven't seen or talked to them in a while, because you will have plenty of time to chat while you wait for a table.  Once you do have a seat, enjoy yourself -- This is one of the best restaurants in town
Matt's recommendation is:  Grilled Tuna, with a nice white wine or crisp pilsner.

Atlanta Beer Garten
(Editor's note:  This place changed names in Feb. 2001.  Check the update below.)
Location:  3013 Peachtree Road, just north of the corner of Peachtree and Pharr.
Cost:  Managable
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Monday or Wednesday Night
Absolute coolest feature is:  The wait staff.  There is a great bunch of people working here.  Or maybe it's just the way they treat me.
Description:  The Atlanta Beer Garten is the world's best sports bar.  Now, some people who come in here are expecting a fancy brewpub-style restaurant, like John Harvard's or Rock Bottom.  If that's what you're looking for, then you will be disappointed.  Think of it this way instead -- Take a typical crappy sports bar, you know, like the one out in the suburbs near your parents' house.  Give it a thorough cleaning.  Now, add some windows so light can actually reach inside.  Throw on a brewery.  Then add the best looking wait staff this side of Hooter's.  Mix well and place in a conspicuous location not that far from Tech's campus.  Voila, the Atlanta Beer Garten.  This is a great place to catch the game, play team trivia, or even just hang out for no reason whatsoever.
Matt's recommendation is:  Beer.  It may not be the best in the world, but it is plenty good enough.  Particularly nice are the stout and the pale ale.
Update:  The beer is the still the same, and much of the description above is still valid.  The old place was huge, so along with a name change came some remodeling, and now there are three restaurants in the old Beer Garten location.  Outside is a fair-weather, Florida-themed bar, inside a cajun restaurant, and in the back is a live music venue.  Two new food menus and a new chef means the grub here is a damn sight better than it used to be, and a big step above most pub fare.  There are three new names for you to learn:  Clutch Cargo (outside, trivia on Mondays); Bayou LaRoux (inside, trivia on Wednesdays); and the Go Lounge (live music Thursday-Saturday).  But the new names are just a technicality -- I will call this the Beer Garden until the day I die.

The Big Chicken
(there is also a trourist trap description for the Big Chicken)
Location:  What, you don't know where the Big Chicken is?  How do you expect to find anything in Atlanta without knowing that?
Cost:  Cheap
Dress:  Shirt and Shoes Required
Best time to visit is:  during a special pilgimage made specifically to see the Big Chicken
Absolute coolest feature is:  The incessantly moving beak and eyes
Description:  Actually a Kentucky Friend Chicken franchise at the intersection of Cobb Parkway and Highway 120 in Marietta, the Big Chicken is one of those places you need to go and eat at least once, if only to say you did.  If you're making the trip out there for the first time, however, let me give you a couple of things to watch for.  First, it is sort of stylized in design, and doesn't look much like a real chicken.  Second, it's probably not as big as you think, and that combined with it's looks means the Big Chicken can actually be easy to miss, if you were looking for a Mothra-sized chicken astride Cobb Parkway like some modern day avian Colossus.  One other warning:  watch your driver carefully.  He may fall into a hypnotic trance and feel compelled t odrive just a mile south to some car dealership because of years of indoctrination by radio commercials.
Matt's recommendation is:  A big ol' bucket of Extra Fatty Crispy.  Screw the coleslaw and other sides and just stock up on mash potatoes and gravy.

Cajun Kitchen
Location:  840 Marietta Street, a couple of blocks north of the Engineer's Bookstore
Cost:  Cheap
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Lunch and Dinner
Absolute coolest feature is:  the wall hangings and murals
Description:  This place is a bit on the grungy side.  Everything, even the small bar, looks like it was purchased second-hand at some swapmeet.  The service is bad, there isn't much of a beer selection, and the parking lot isn't even paved.  So why come here?  They have some of the Best Damn Sandwiches in town.
Matt's recommendation is:  The Gulfer's Po Boy, a beautiful sandwich that features both fried shrimp and crab cakes.

Carlie G's
Location:  1041 West Peachtree Street (West Peachtree and 11th)
Cost:  Manageable
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Any evening after band practice
Absolute coolest feature is:  the upstairs loft
Description:  This is the former home of the Vortex, which moved to larger digs a couple of years ago, but this spot is still a great location for a small bar.  And they have 60 or so brands of beer to choose from, too.  Charlie G's, if it were even 100 feet closer to campus, would be one of those places all of us would just sort of show up at -- no plans to meet, no organized activity, just a bunch of people showing up after classes for a beer.  If you'd like to check it out, I'd recommend grabbing a whole gang of folks, so you can take up a sizable chunk of the upstairs loft/dining room, turning it into your own little club.  It's like when you were a kid and you'd hang out in a treehouse, except now that treehouse has some good beer and a waitress to bring the bottles up to you.
Matt's recommendation is:  Something unusual, like an Augustiner or Hoegaarden, and an appitizer to munch on while you chat with your friends.

Chick-fil-a Dwarf House
Location:  Various.  The original location is down in Hapeville.
Cost:  Cheap
Dress:  Shirt and Shoes Required
Best time to visit is:  If you don't know, I'm not telling
Absolute coolest feature is:  If you don't know, I'm not telling
Description:  Imagine crossing a Chick-fil-a with a Waffle House.  Yep, it really is a s good as it sounds.
Matt's recommendation is:  Chick-fil-a as a part of a complete breakfast.

Cowtippers
Location:  1600 Piedmont Avenue
Cost:  Managable
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Early evening, just as the sun is going down.
Absolute coolest feature is:  The Deck
Description:  Cowtippers has a lot going for it.  It's in a beautiful location, with trees all around, but is still easily found because it's right off Piedmont.  It has a great view off the deck, and the deck itself is huge.  It has free parking.  The beer selection is pretty good, too.  But I don't like it.  This place claims to be a steakhouse, but in my opinion they can't cook a decent steak.  I want to like this place, and I wish I could recommend it, but I can't.  There are at least 20 places in town where you can find a better meal for this kind of money.
Matt's recommendation is:  Be very specific on how you want your steak cooked.  It might not hurt to stand over the chef's shoulder and watch it yourself.

Fado
Location:  3035 Peachtree Road, in Buckhead
Cost:  Manageable
Dress:   Casual
Best time to visit is:  on a first date
Absolute coolest feature is:  The Fireplace, particularly on a cold and rainy day
Description:  Fado has a glossy quality, almost like there is something not quite real about it.  It seems like a bar from the Irish exhibit down at Epcot.  But when you get past teh darby-o'gill-and-the-little-people-disney-movie-quality the pervades the place, you'll find that it actually is a great Irish pub.  They pour an excellent pint of Guinness, the best in town, and the food here is just as good as the beer.  Stop by on a Monday night, when they host a jam session featuring musicians on traditional Irish instruments, or on a Wednesday night for other live music.  In either case, the music starts at 9 PM, but be sure to show up early because this place will fill up fast.
Matt's recommendation is:  A pint of Guinness (or two, or five) and the Shepherd's Pie.  (2001 Update:  Corned beef and cabbage was my favorite dish here, but it was taken off the menu.  Too few people were ordering it.)

Fat Matt's Rib Shack
Location:  1811 Piedmont Avenue
Cost:  Cheap, for what you get.
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Let me check... yep, I still have a pulse.  Let's go!
Absolute coolest feature is:  It's a toss up.  "Hey, you got you blues in my barbecue!"  "No, you got your barbecue in my blues!"
Description:  Fat Matt's lives up to its name, since it is shoehorned into a small roadside building and it serves Ribs.  And Fat Matt is pretty much how I fell when I leave.  Fatt Matt's Rib Shack, like most barbecue joints, offers some great value for your money.  You will likely spend more than you expect, though -- not on food but on beer -- as you sit and soak up beer, BBQ, and the Blues in roughly equal proportion.  The postage-stamp-sized stage is at one end of their already small dining room, and it features some of the best amateur and semi-pro blues acts Atlanta has to offer.  Grab some friends, get there early to grab a good seat, and dig in!
Matt's recommendation is:  The Ribs.  mmmm... ribs...  There is also chicken for those of you who are a bit more health conscious.  Order some of both.

Front Page News
Location:  1104 Crescent Avenue
Cost:  Managable
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Any afternoon for a late lunch.
Absolute coolest feature is:  The newspapers.  Go there and you'll see what I'm talking about.
Description:  If you took any random restaurant manager, even a really slow one, and gave them a setup this nice they couldn't help but make a profit.  The menu is from New Orleans, the draft is imported, and the bar has that classic neighborood feel.  You almost expect to see Norm from Cheers holding down a corner barstool, lifting a mug in greeting as you walk up the stairs to the front door.  It's quiet, up and away from the sidewalks, and Crescent Avenue is one of those small side streets that seems a million miles away from the rest of the city.  This is an ideal place for a lunch date, or a group study session.
Matt's recommendation is:  A pint of Bass Ale, and just about anything spicy off the menu.
Update:  Construction on new high-rises off of 10th, 14th, Peachtree, and West Peachtree have made getting to Crescent Avenue extremely difficult in the past year or so, and parking a real pain in the ass too.

Fubar
(Closed.  see upate.)
Location:  Corner of 13th and Crescent Avenue
Cost:  Manageable
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Thursday evenings, for the Guinness and oyster special
Absolute coolest feature is:  The kitchen, which is open to the dining area, there to the left of the bar.  You can even pull up a stool and watch the cooks work.
Description:  Fubar, besides being a candidate for the "Best Bar Name Ever" award, is also one of the few cheap places you can get good seafood in Midtown.  It may also be one of the few places where you can trust the freshness and quality implicitly; after all, you can see into the kitchen from most of the dining area.  Being just a few yards away from the chef.
Matt's recommendation is:  Any of the more than 100 kinds of bottled beer.  Try something new, like Elephant Beer or Fiedler Pils.
Update:  Metrotainment Cafes, the corporate owner, decided to put a bakery in this location instead of a bar.  At some point in the future they would like to upgrade to a deli/bakery for the lunch business, though there is no specific timeline in place.  If you have a craving for seafood, try Clutch Cargo in Buckhead (3013 Peachtree Road, in the old Beer Garten location)

Fuse Box
(Closed.  see update.)
Location:  Piedmont Road
Cost:  Too Much
Dress:  Get out the neck tie, you're gonna need it.
Best time to visit is:  With a date
Absolute coolest feature is:  The gas torch buring outside the front door.
Description:  One of those fancy places featuring fusion cuisine that seemed to have popped up overnight like a bunch of mushrooms.  "Fusion," of course, is a buzzword that means "whatever the hell the chef wants to cook."  The food here certainly is fancy, but leaves me wondering first, why that combo of ingredients?, and second, I wonder if there's stuff to fix a sandwich back at the house.  I would skip this place, unless you need to impress a date with style over substance.
Matt's recommendation is:  Anything called "California" or "Mediterranean".  Stay away from "Asian" dishes, as they tend to be spicy.  unless, like me, you like spicy.
Update:  Good riddance.  Some major renovations were going on the last time I drove by, and I'm not sure if the new building is going to be a restaurant or not.

Joe's on Juniper
Location:  Um, it's on, like, Juniper.  1041 Juniper Street, south of 11th.  (Juniper is one way headed south)
Cost:  Manageable
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  Late afternoon or early evening, when everyone else is stuck in traffic.
Absolute coolest feature is:  Old political campaign buttons embedded into the bar (a leftover from when this place was called Fillibusters)
Description:  Joe's is a great place to hang out, with excellent burgers, 32 different beers on draft, and 80 or so types of bottled beer on top of that.  Their grill is open late, so it makes a good alternative to the Waffle Ho' for that midnight craving.  Or that odd food craving, since Spam and Spamburgers are items on the menu.  Joe's is close to campus, with good food and probably the best beer selection this side of Buckhead -- So why haven't you heard about it?  Let me put it this way:  On a typical Friday night the crowd is split into roughly three parts.  There are single guys, single girls, and... other... single guys.  Yeah, so, maybe you could call Joe's a gay bar.  Don't let that keep you away.  The food here is worth a trip out.
Matt's recommendation is:  Skip the french fries.  Get a Crystal Castle burger, but sub in potato salad for the fries.  Match that with a beer you haven't tried before, like Grant's Perfect Porter or Flying Dog Pale Ale.

John Harvard's
(Closed.  See update.)
Location:  3039 Peachtree Road in Buckhead, and 1564 Holcomb Bridge Road in Roswell
Cost:  Manageable
Dress:  Casual
Best time to visit is:  With a bunch of friends for a nice dinner, followed by lots of drinking.
Absolute coolest feature is:  the stained galss window decorations
Description:  John Harvard's has arguably the best beer in town.  Their menu is also excellent.  Another plus is the selection of beers on cask -- made in small batches and usually having a much more assertive character and flavor.  There is one argument you can make against it -- if you are settling in for some serious drinking you will quickly run out of money.
Matt's recommendation is:  The Old Ivy Pale Ale, and a grilled Cuban sandwich for lunch
Update:  The John Harvard's chain (based out of Massachusets) was bought out by some chain of family restaurants that is also based out of New England.  From what I heard, they just wanted the locations up north for restaurants, and could give a rats ass about beer, brewpubs, and anything south of the Mason-Dixon line.  Harvard's must have been in trouble for a while before the buy-out, as the Roswell location closed eight months earlier than the Buckhead location.  There is a sign in the window saying they are closed for renovations, but they've been closed since February and the main sign outside is gone.  If you were a Harvard's fan, your best bet may be to try Rock Bottom, just up Peachtree about a mile.

Landmark Diner
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Max Lager's
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The Palm
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The Park Tavern
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Prince of Wales Pub
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Rock Bottom
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Sambuca Jazz Cafe
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Smith's Olde Bar
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Taco Mac
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The Vortex
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Three Dollar Cafe
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Waffle House
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And now, for the first time in print, is Matt's Truly Evil Clue Idea (TM), one so bad that they wouldn't let me use it, and also the main reason I wanted to include the restaurant reviews in the manual.  As it was originally published, at the bottom of each restaurant listing in the lower right corner in the smallest font I could manage, I included a 10 digit code.  The idea for the clue was simple:  hand the teams a single sheet of paper, upon which is a Universal Product Code -- you know, the little box of thick and thin black lines and numbers on the back label of everything sold in stores, the ones the laser scanners read at the check-out counter.  That's it.  Random lines, ten numbers, and no help.

The way to solve it, of course, is to realize that a UPC is more commonly called a "bar code".  We give you the bar code, you go to the manual and look up the bar.  If you noticed the numbers on the restaurant listings.  If you don't take it to a grocery store and try to get it scanned.  If you don't treat the numbers like a secret code and decode the words "GO TO NEWNAN".

But we never used the bar code.  (The kicker, I thought, would be to use the actual UPC from a can of Draught Guinness, just in case someone did have it scanned.  The bar code in that particular case would have been used for Fado Irish Pub.)

The other clue idea intended to make use of these restaurant listings needs some back story.  Starting on the very day we won, while we were still playing the game, I insisted that I did not want to win, I didn't want to be on game control, "If nominated I will not run, if elected I will not serve".  My concession to the rest of the team was that if they did manage to win, I would volunteer to be a clue site.  I would have holed up in a bar somewhere, and people would have to come in and see me to get their clue.

Despite my best intentions, eventually I was dragged kicking and screaming from my comfy couch into Game Control meetings, and later chained to a word processor until I finished the OHDaMN.  Or at least that's how I remember it.

It was at one of these GC meetings, when we were discussing themes for Get-a-Clue 2000, that the idea of "Matt on the Run" came up.  Here's the set-up:  During an unrelated opening skit, we would stage a small scene where I would blow up in anger at the rest of Game Control, throw a bunch of papers into the air, and stalk out of the Couch Building while muttering something about 'going to get a beer'.  Actually, I think the idea was "John on the Run" first, but I'm self-centered enough to prefer the other version.

During the game, teams would receive various humorous clues relating to my disappearance, and at some point in the game would have to figure out exactly where I was at.  Teams would get a paragraph citing "Matt sightings" and would have to plot out on a map where I was headed, using the information given to you in the restaurant listings.  I, in the meantime, would be hanging out in the aforementioned bar drinking the aforementioned beer.

I think it was doubt in my acting abilities (or the water balloon launcher) that finally scuttled this idea.  Honestly, it's all for the best anyway.  While it was hilarious to discuss stuff like this in meetings, I think the actual implementation would have lacked something.

Another idea was related to this one, but did not require me to act.  It did, however, require a map that was not provided to you in the OHDaMN, showing midtown and buckhead with each of these restaurants listed and labeled on it.  Folks would be given a paragraph describing a bar crawl through town.  If you went and plotted it on the map you'd get an unintelligible squiggle, but if you noticed that there were exactly 26 listings, and each restaurant had been given a one-letter label, you would then have a complete alphabet capable of decoding the message, and a fair explanation on why I kept going back to the same bars a lot in the bar crawl description.  The message thus encoded would not necessarily have anything to do with me or with the bars, but even so it would send the strong subliminal message that I am an alcoholic.

Please note that all three of these clue ideas never really got serious consideration, and that the bar code and bar crawl clues were dumped early in the "brainstorming" phase.
 

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