Black hair, brown eyes, short but with nice teeth, high school junior, loves Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup. OK, OK, fine then. I guess it's the wrong place to put up a personal ad, but I'm only writing one because ... well, eh hem ... that's because I'm a little (cough) dateless for Valentine's Day. Yes, I've already tried asking a few girls out, and - like all the others - the 48th girl said "No." Apparently, there is a problem here. I'm beginning to think that no one wants to go out with me. Let me think. Hmmm ... one girl's mom wouldn't let her, another girl already had a date, another one thought I was a freak, and another said "I'll think about it" and never talked to me again. Would someone please tell me what I'm doing wrong here? I've already gotten my hepatitis B shots, but still! No date! I just don't get it. I'm what my friend calls "confuzzled." My breath doesn't stink, does it? Want to know what I'm going to do about my dateless situation? Do you want me to tell you what I'm going to do about it? Well, I'll tell you what I'm going to do about it. I will do absolutely NOTHING about it! That's what! What do you think of that?! I will sit here, fold my arms, cross my legs Indian-style, and wait for a girl to ask me out. Listen, I'm no quitter (well, except for that one metal ring puzzle). I'm just taking a different approach. Yeah, that's it, a different approach. Hey, I don't want to sound negative, bitter or something bad. Well, let's put it this way, and I'm speaking for other dateless guys out there: I am a guy of the 21st Century. That sounds better. It is the guy of the 21st Century versus the guy of the primitive Stone Age. It is the guy of the 21st Century who is sensitive, who listens, who considers others' feelings versus the guy of the primitive Stone Age who is nonchalant, traditional and dominating. The guy of the 21st Century is the one who breaks redundant tradition ... and that includes the typical "guy asks girl out" routine. Yeah, guy of the 21st Century - that's me, pal. Here is the big enchilada: It would be nice if the girls would break this routine and give the guys a break for once. (The whole "no" thing is getting a little redundant.) A girl who would want a date should muster up some guts and ask out the dateless guy. Breaking this routine is something new and different to do - and doing something different and new is nice once in awhile, right? Right. I am a dateless guy (hint hint). In the mean time, I'll sit here and maybe do a little moseying around the place a little. Here, I'll help some people get started. Remember: black hair, brown eyes, short but with nice teeth, high school junior, loves Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup. So, if any girl who wants to rescue me from a dateless evening, my name is Les. If you are interested and you happen to see me walking around, feel free to ask me out. I'd be more than glad to. Someone? Somebody? Please? ANYBODY?! Then again, there is always Nintendo 64.