Deformation
by Nuggit

Note: I probably wrote this in the middle of the night. I don't remember writing this, not really, but I found it in my notebook. It was pretty random. When I finished reading this I burst out laughing, because it was so creepy and sick and weird and I didn't expect it at all. It is an odd jewel in my collection. I just had to put it here. Other than it being weird, it's badly written.

I got up. It was five o'clock. I went to the bathroom and flipped on the light with my index finger. My fingernail snapped off my finger and fell to the floor. "Wow, this has never happened before," I said, and bent down to pick it up, but then bumped my head on the doorknob. I got the fingernail then looked into the mirror. Now I had a half-moon-shaped bruise on my forehead. I noticed my hair was messy. So I got out a brush and started to comb it through my hair as best as I could. Actually it wouldn't comb through at all, my hair was so tangled. I yanked on the brush and off came the whole mess of hair. I tilted my head at the mirror and I could see there was a big bald patch among the rest of the fuzz. I put the brush back into the drawer, and as I closed it, accidentally rammed my fingers. I held them up and they felt a little numb. I whapped them on the edge of the porcelain sink, and there was a satisfying cracking sound. I got my toothbrush, my cup, and floss. "Floss first," I remembered, and I slipped out a string of it. In between my two front teeth, the space next to it, on one side of my canine tooth, on the other side of my canine tooth, then into the molars. In one place I got to, the floss got stuck and wouldn't come out. I tugged and tugged. Then, my tooth fell out. A molar. I looked at it for a second, then kept on with my floss into the next space, and another tooth fell out. I threw away the floss because I needed all the rest of my teeth so I could eat breakfast after brushing and mouthwashing.

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