The Heresy of C.E. and B.C.E.

As EVERYBODY KNOWS, even Atheists, the world views time as based around when Gid made it, at the year zero. Even the youngest members of the human race understand this. In January of the year zero, Gid decided to mark time from then, mainly because he hadn’t done much to interfere with humanity for a good decade. (He thought changing the way humans view time would be a good way to catch up.) Our beloved ways of measuring time, that is B.G.P.W.T. (Before Gid Played With Time) and A.G.P.W.T. (After Gid Played With Time), have now been DISREGARDED by HERETICAL scholars in favour of a time measurement that COMPLETELY ignores Gid’s efforts!!!

Now the scholars argue that the Roman Empire fell in 430 CE rather than the obviously more accurate and Gidianly correct 430 AGPWT! This is heresy and must be opposed! It is a sneaky and rude way of ignoring the supremacy of Gid’s power, while STILL using time, GID’S INVENTION! How dare the scholars, who are overpaid and stupid I might add, use GID’s time without even acknowledging Him? Let us oppose this heretical rebellion against the one True Gid, NO MATTER WHAT THE SPLEEN SAYS OF THINKS.

        - GidDoctor Thutmoose, G.V.