What
Does the Bible Say About
Spanking
Children?
Proverbs 13:24(KJV):
"He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth
him betimes."
Proverbs 13:24(AMP):
"He who spares his rod (of discipline) hates his son,
but he who
loves him diligently disciplines and punishes him early."
The practical
wisdom found in these verses in the book of Proverbs covers the subject
of child rearing and corporal punishment. Children who are not properly
disciplined, are among the most miserable of children. Unruly and spoiled
children are not the blessings that the Bible says they should be to parents.
When a child is given no boundaries, they feel lost. If they have been
given boundaries, yet those boundaries are not maintained, it causes great
harm to a child, as they will not only be in dangerous territory, they
will also lose respect for authority. This is where we find so many of
the children and youth of today. They are rebels, who not only disrespect
authority, but openly defy all authority figures such as teachers, policemen,
clergy, and their own parents. The blame rests upon the parents of these
children, if they have not heeded the advice given in this and other verses
found in Proverbs.
This brings
us to the subject of how we should discipline a child who disobeys the
rules. There has been much debate on the subject of corporal punishment
(the spanking of a child). Corporal punishment simply means bodily punishment
while the definition of spank in Webster's Dictionary is: 1.) to strike
with something flat, as the open hand, especially on the buttocks, as in
punishment. 2.) to move along swiftly or smartly, a smack given in spanking.
This is what the Bible says about spanking:
Proverbs 22:15:
"Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline
will drive it far from him."
Proverbs 23:13-14:
"Withold not discipline from the child, for if you strike and punish him
with the (reed-like) rod, he will not die. Thou shalt beat him with the
rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."
First of all,
discipline of children should begin at an early age, whenever a child begins
to defy the parent. Remember the old saying, "He who spares the rod, spoils
the child." Notice that the Bible says that all children have foolishness
in their hearts. The Bible definition of a fool means one who is
a rebel, so this is saying that all children have rebellion in them and
when it surfaces, it is our duty as parents to drive it out of them.
We are to do this by punishing them with a whack on the buttocks with a
small reed-like rod. This rod could be a switch from a fruit tree branch
or a willow tree branch or a small wooden spoon. It is not to be a large
heavy rod or anything that would cause permanent physical damage.
The purpose of a spanking is not to cause any lasting bodily harm, but
to cause spiritual correction. A spanking should be swift and cause short
lived pain that makes a point. That point is that the small pain
they feel now will prevent them from feeling great pain by the act they
are committing, which could cause them loss of their lives in some cases.
(For instance, if a child tries to run across the street, they could be
run over and killed.)
Some people
say that all spanking is child abuse, but this is totally wrong. The real
abuse to the child is not to spank them when they need correction.
Of course, some parents, who themselves are out of control, can abuse their
children by beating them in angry rages. This is child abuse, however,
it does not justify doing away with spanking children if it is done properly,
and for the right reasons. Parents who beat their children, need help themselves.
They are sinful people and they not only will abuse their children by beating
them, but will hurt them in other ways as well. Many times, these same
children are left to go hungry and uncared for. They have no love. These
kind of homes need the love of Christ so that the whole family can be healed.
We are not to spank our children with uncontrolled anger, and thus hand
out unjust punishment.
Proverbs 19:18(AMP):
"Discipline your son while there is hope, but do not (indulge your angry
resentments
by undue chastisements
and) set yourself to his ruin."
Proverbs 22:6:
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will
not depart from it."
Godly discipline
will keep children from being dysfunctional later in life. We are told
as Christian parents to train our children in the ways of the Lord and
when he grows up, he will not depart from that training. Notice it
says "train" not "teach." Many parents teach their children right from
wrong, but have failed to "train" them to obey. Spanking is part
of the training. Many parents yell and threaten their children, but
never follow through with the proper punishment and therefore their children
get their own way. A disciplined child will bring great delight to parents,
while the child left alone will bring shame to the home.
Proverbs 29:15
&17(AMP):
15 The rod
and reproof give wisdom, but a child left undisciplined brings his mother
to shame.
17 Correct
your son, and he will give you rest; yes, he will give delight to your
heart.
Ephesians 6:1-4:
1 Children,
obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
2 Honour thy
father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise;
3 That it may
be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
4 And, ye fathers,
provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and
admonition of the Lord.
Prayer for
the Day:
Dear Heavenly
Father, Thank you for my children and grandchildren. I have learned so
much over the years through the parenting process. I have failed so many
times, but You have been there to pick me up and help me overcome the things
that came against me and my children. Lord, being a parent is a challenge
that only with Your help and love can we be the kind of parents that You
call us to be. Lord, I pray for all mothers and fathers who are seeking
You for help with their families. Grant Your help and favor to them.
Give them your love, wisdom and patience in dealing with their children.
May all Christians be the godly parents You call them to be, and may their
children be loving and obedient so that we all have happy and blessed homes.
I ask this in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
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