Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next when his telephone rang.
"Hallo! Mr. Hussein," a heavily accented voice said. 
"This is Paddy up in County Cavan, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!

"Well, Paddy," Saddam replied, "this is indeed important news! Tell me, how big is your army? "

At this moment in time," said Paddy after a moment's calculation, "there is  myself,
my cousin Sean, my next door neighbor Gerry, and
the entire dominoes team from the pub -- that makes eight! 

Saddam sighed. "I must tell you Paddy
that I have a million men in my army waiting to move on my command.

"Begorrah!" said Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back! 

Sure enough

The next day Paddy rang back. "Right Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We
have managed to acquire some equipment! 

"And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Saddam asked.

"Well, we have two combine harvesters, a bulldozer and
Murphy's tractor from the farm. 

Once more Saddam sighed. "I must tell
you, Paddy, that I have sixteen thousand tanks, fourteen thousand armored
personnel carriers, and my army has increased to
two million men since we last spoke. 

"Really?" said Paddy "I'll have to
ring you back! 

Sure enough

Paddy called again the next day. "Right Mr.
Hussein, I am sorry to tell you
that we have had to call off the war. 

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam.
"Why the sudden change of heart?" 

"Well," said Paddy "We've had a look
at the Geneva Convention, all had a chat, and
there's no way we can feed
two million prisoners.